Arctopus review: Pitchfork blows one again

where do their numeric ratings come from anyway? it seems like they're completely useless if a 5.1 is no good but a 6.8 is good.

He probably has a complex algorythm that produces such precise figures because reviewing albums is SCIENCE and everything can be abstracted in a series of codified ratios, be it inspiration, emotion, resonance.
 
Negative reviews are just about the most worthless thing ever. You gain almost nothing from reading one, the only thing that matters is why people like a certain piece of music, not why others don't like it. If i read a review i want to read at least an objective attempt to suggest why people would like it (in a non condescending way). Ideally i'll read a review from someone who loves the album and can express why in an informative way. I dont want to hear words such as "boring", "uninspired", "pseudo-intellectual" etc which all really say nothing more than "i dont like it".

Seriously, i struggle to think of many times i've ever read a completely negative comment about a piece of music and actually thought it had some relevance. People typically are not limited by what they like, but by all their stupid boundaries defining what they dont like. I really don't need to hear about it! Much better to break down boundaries and discover the magic in something, than to read about what it's not achieving.

I guess the only use for negative reviews is if you find a reviewer whose taste is almost exactly the same as your own (practically impossible), and it can suggest not that the album is necessarily bad, but that it's not for you. And i'm not suggesting negative things shouldn't be said, just that i see a lot more worth in saying "this album is good because a,b,c but from that angle the drawbacks are x,y,z" as opposed to "this album sucks because of d,e,f" which usually has no relevance to what the album is actually achieving.

rant ended
 
YaYo said:
Negative reviews are just about the most worthless thing ever.

/agree and /disagree

Most negative reviews are worthless for the reasons you mention - but I think there has got to be a way of writing about music (and maybe even an actual working writer operating this way) that can take what the reviewer thinks the band is trying to do and analyze how successful it is - so there's at least some logical basis for criticism. Of course the problem is that most bands have no idea what they're trying to do.
 
I love reading negative/critical reviews, especially when they're done well

the problem is that 70-80% of all music that gets released and reviewed is painfully mediocre. it makes it really hard to write about b/c you can't really trash it, but you can't laud it either. since I can't just say "meh" about everything, it's a real challenge to find new ways to talk about this dreck.
 
A refinement:

Most music doesn't suck, because there is a heavily standardized (if often unconscious to many performers) method of making music "work" - the rules are easy to follow and especially in rock music - most people with a passable skill at their instrument can pull it off - they can tug at your emotions or get your adrenaline up because there are methods to do this catalogued by the history of the genre - same in movies.

True this all relies on a moving target definition of "sucking" - I guess what I mean is that most bands are effective within the structured limits they place themselves in.