I've read many funny April 1st postings this week and this one is pretty good.
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"April 1st Breaking News!
A new NSA software is to be released from Fractal Audio in the near future. Here is a recent interview about this from us at the Company Exposure Satire Community.
To start off, we politely asked both Cliff and Scott to pass the ID gear opinion police security check that we always require. We asked them to pose for a photo of them together with their passports, Axe fx, today's newspaper and a piece of toilet paper with the words "we never lie & we promote good business ethics" with their signatures, wearing speedos and pinching each other's nipples. They agreed reluctantly. Those who refuse our ID police check will be publicly ridiculed or worse.
Q: So please tell us about your collaboration with NSA and the new software. We know Vladimir Putin, North Korea and China also are interested in this.
-Cliff Chase:
We are very proud to work with NSA and with this software we finally can have total surveillance control inside everyone's computer and keep opinions at bay that are the slightest negative towards Fractal Audio and the Axe fx. Our proud high post removal and member banning ratio is not found elsewhere on gear forums and that ratio will sky rocket now on both the Fractal forum and on The Gear Page forum that we use as a marketing platform. Just like before, anyone who says anything negative about the Axe fx on these two forums will be ridiculed, accused of flame baiting, censored, deleted and banned. With this software it will happen before they even log in for the first time. I can't wait!
Q: That sounds like impressive new technology. Now some more questions.
Many users really like the Axe fx product but aren't you worried by the fact that many make fun of your completely unique and aggressive censorship control? Some say such behavior is a sign of weakness and product insecurity. You two work close together with marketing and are known to have a very aggressive online presence towards those who for various reasons don't like the axe fx or prefer other gear. History also show evidence of Fractal being exposed and proven wrong and using FUD, creating false info about other gear in order to promote the Axe fx. Gear users also don't see any other companies staff or CEO's behaving like this, so don't you think that it's counterproductive and bad PR for the company? Isn't a humble attitude and acceptance of different opinions the most important thing for companies brand internet reputation and for potential customers?
-Scott Peterson:
Absolutely not, and we're not aggressive. That's ridiculous, haters gonna hate, haha! YMMV. I have 20+ years of pro marketing experience, I know some basic psychology too and I have no agendas here. I'm just a regular guy/neutral fan-boy who's polite and fair and I don't know what things like double standards and FUD means. I'm the neutral admin and owner of TGP and a beta tester and moderator on the fractal forum and I represent and promote the Axe fx product with tens of thousands of posts. My forum rhetoric and presence does not hurt Fractal Audio. Cliff and I are so tight together. We work hard so our forums becomes a place where members are nicely submitted to walk in straight lines. Those who stray from the line will be dealt with. Other forums don't have this strict control and censorship at all. I wouldn't call it "management by fear", I call it a healthy company controlled environment. I would be a great resource to any company's PR section. I know best how to promote a positive brand image and my online aura is positive, despite what everyone else says everywhere else outside of the FAS and TGP forums.
Q: And what do you think of your new NSA software?
-Scott Peterson:
This new NSA thing is amazing and will make life easier for me! Let me tell you, it's 24/7 hard work to strap on the uniform, silence, ridicule, prevent exposure and demand proof of every single gear user out there who says something not in favor of the Axe fx or Fractal Audio. Why would anyone be allowed to share negative opinions about the axe fx or Cliff's or my behaviour on a gear forum? Who do they think they are? We work hard to exterminate those opinions and we delete anything they can complain about. For me it's perfectly OK if users complain about gear like Line6, Boss, Eleven rack on my forum. I take on the grandiose role as both gear and opinion police and I frequently and proudly violate the TGP forum rules of conduct. I'm immune and can't be reprimanded you know, and that goes for Cliff too for that matter. Being able to call users agenda trolls and being protected when trash talking other gear without being suspended is important for us. We're a great tag team promoting the Axe fx in a professional and positive way.
Q: Your hard work together almost sounds intimate, some say you could be more than friends, maybe lovers or more. Is this true?
-Scott Peterson:
Haha, no. But haters gonna hate, ymmv.
I must say that last year TheGearPage also proudly implemented a script tool that prevents any thread history searches on Google. No one can find all the deleted threads and posts anymore. We love it, exposure can be dangerous. It's not possible to Google TGP history anymore, try it.
Q: Isn't that called "damage control", deleting information and exposure that is not in favor for a company.
NSA have already surpassed Orwell's 1984 book and with this soon to be released NSA software we might see this even more, is that correct?.
-Scott Peterson:
Yep and that's how we like it! Cliff and I really know PR and how to give Fractal Audio a positive brand reputation. We would never hire so called "professionals" to handle important online PR for Fractal.
Q: Will the NSA software help you censor users who talk about specific gear in the off topic section on the fractal forum?
-Cliff Chase:
You bet, and with this new NSA tool the control will be complete. Non competitive gear like Line6, Boss and Eleven rack is OK to discuss there but many threads about the new Amplifire from Studio Devil have been deleted. Just look at it and read the specs. The Kempler posts have given me roids and a terrible rash all over my body so I can't sleep and I can't remember how many of those discussions we have ridiculed and deleted. And those who post about going back to real amps after playing the Axe fx 2 must be insane. A good sounding product can only be marketed by numbers, measurements and a high DSP cost. Algorithms and programing is not important for sound, but I still constantly re-model and make sound changes to the Axe fx even though it was 120% real many years ago with the same DSP. What can be better, why complain? Only agenda trolls do that!
Q: Can this new NSA software prevent even more people from presenting hard evidence that the new fractal ultra-res IR have less high freq content and limited bandwidth and is in fact not at all higher resolution than normal available IR's? Many say the hyped ultra-res IR marketing claims are false here.
-Cliff Chase:
Sure it will help. I will always be right even if others prove me wrong. I'm all about being a humble guy who value positive PR branding and business ethics.
Q: Thanks gentlemen for the interview and good luck in the future!
-Cliff Chase:
Thanks! With NSA help it will be a tough year indeed for haters and agenda trolls.
-Scott Peterson:
Haters gonna hate, YMMV."
--------------------------
------------------------
"April 1st Breaking News!
A new NSA software is to be released from Fractal Audio in the near future. Here is a recent interview about this from us at the Company Exposure Satire Community.
To start off, we politely asked both Cliff and Scott to pass the ID gear opinion police security check that we always require. We asked them to pose for a photo of them together with their passports, Axe fx, today's newspaper and a piece of toilet paper with the words "we never lie & we promote good business ethics" with their signatures, wearing speedos and pinching each other's nipples. They agreed reluctantly. Those who refuse our ID police check will be publicly ridiculed or worse.
Q: So please tell us about your collaboration with NSA and the new software. We know Vladimir Putin, North Korea and China also are interested in this.
-Cliff Chase:
We are very proud to work with NSA and with this software we finally can have total surveillance control inside everyone's computer and keep opinions at bay that are the slightest negative towards Fractal Audio and the Axe fx. Our proud high post removal and member banning ratio is not found elsewhere on gear forums and that ratio will sky rocket now on both the Fractal forum and on The Gear Page forum that we use as a marketing platform. Just like before, anyone who says anything negative about the Axe fx on these two forums will be ridiculed, accused of flame baiting, censored, deleted and banned. With this software it will happen before they even log in for the first time. I can't wait!
Q: That sounds like impressive new technology. Now some more questions.
Many users really like the Axe fx product but aren't you worried by the fact that many make fun of your completely unique and aggressive censorship control? Some say such behavior is a sign of weakness and product insecurity. You two work close together with marketing and are known to have a very aggressive online presence towards those who for various reasons don't like the axe fx or prefer other gear. History also show evidence of Fractal being exposed and proven wrong and using FUD, creating false info about other gear in order to promote the Axe fx. Gear users also don't see any other companies staff or CEO's behaving like this, so don't you think that it's counterproductive and bad PR for the company? Isn't a humble attitude and acceptance of different opinions the most important thing for companies brand internet reputation and for potential customers?
-Scott Peterson:
Absolutely not, and we're not aggressive. That's ridiculous, haters gonna hate, haha! YMMV. I have 20+ years of pro marketing experience, I know some basic psychology too and I have no agendas here. I'm just a regular guy/neutral fan-boy who's polite and fair and I don't know what things like double standards and FUD means. I'm the neutral admin and owner of TGP and a beta tester and moderator on the fractal forum and I represent and promote the Axe fx product with tens of thousands of posts. My forum rhetoric and presence does not hurt Fractal Audio. Cliff and I are so tight together. We work hard so our forums becomes a place where members are nicely submitted to walk in straight lines. Those who stray from the line will be dealt with. Other forums don't have this strict control and censorship at all. I wouldn't call it "management by fear", I call it a healthy company controlled environment. I would be a great resource to any company's PR section. I know best how to promote a positive brand image and my online aura is positive, despite what everyone else says everywhere else outside of the FAS and TGP forums.
Q: And what do you think of your new NSA software?
-Scott Peterson:
This new NSA thing is amazing and will make life easier for me! Let me tell you, it's 24/7 hard work to strap on the uniform, silence, ridicule, prevent exposure and demand proof of every single gear user out there who says something not in favor of the Axe fx or Fractal Audio. Why would anyone be allowed to share negative opinions about the axe fx or Cliff's or my behaviour on a gear forum? Who do they think they are? We work hard to exterminate those opinions and we delete anything they can complain about. For me it's perfectly OK if users complain about gear like Line6, Boss, Eleven rack on my forum. I take on the grandiose role as both gear and opinion police and I frequently and proudly violate the TGP forum rules of conduct. I'm immune and can't be reprimanded you know, and that goes for Cliff too for that matter. Being able to call users agenda trolls and being protected when trash talking other gear without being suspended is important for us. We're a great tag team promoting the Axe fx in a professional and positive way.
Q: Your hard work together almost sounds intimate, some say you could be more than friends, maybe lovers or more. Is this true?
-Scott Peterson:
Haha, no. But haters gonna hate, ymmv.
I must say that last year TheGearPage also proudly implemented a script tool that prevents any thread history searches on Google. No one can find all the deleted threads and posts anymore. We love it, exposure can be dangerous. It's not possible to Google TGP history anymore, try it.
Q: Isn't that called "damage control", deleting information and exposure that is not in favor for a company.
NSA have already surpassed Orwell's 1984 book and with this soon to be released NSA software we might see this even more, is that correct?.
-Scott Peterson:
Yep and that's how we like it! Cliff and I really know PR and how to give Fractal Audio a positive brand reputation. We would never hire so called "professionals" to handle important online PR for Fractal.
Q: Will the NSA software help you censor users who talk about specific gear in the off topic section on the fractal forum?
-Cliff Chase:
You bet, and with this new NSA tool the control will be complete. Non competitive gear like Line6, Boss and Eleven rack is OK to discuss there but many threads about the new Amplifire from Studio Devil have been deleted. Just look at it and read the specs. The Kempler posts have given me roids and a terrible rash all over my body so I can't sleep and I can't remember how many of those discussions we have ridiculed and deleted. And those who post about going back to real amps after playing the Axe fx 2 must be insane. A good sounding product can only be marketed by numbers, measurements and a high DSP cost. Algorithms and programing is not important for sound, but I still constantly re-model and make sound changes to the Axe fx even though it was 120% real many years ago with the same DSP. What can be better, why complain? Only agenda trolls do that!
Q: Can this new NSA software prevent even more people from presenting hard evidence that the new fractal ultra-res IR have less high freq content and limited bandwidth and is in fact not at all higher resolution than normal available IR's? Many say the hyped ultra-res IR marketing claims are false here.
-Cliff Chase:
Sure it will help. I will always be right even if others prove me wrong. I'm all about being a humble guy who value positive PR branding and business ethics.
Q: Thanks gentlemen for the interview and good luck in the future!
-Cliff Chase:
Thanks! With NSA help it will be a tough year indeed for haters and agenda trolls.
-Scott Peterson:
Haters gonna hate, YMMV."
--------------------------
