How many licks?

S4R

gooey
Sep 7, 2001
8,575
9
38
41
.il.us
How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?


I know the owl said 3, but i would guess about 350.
 
...it was only two licks:p :p because the cheating ass owl licked the Tootsie pop twice and then bit it....
Man, if I had been that kid I would have pulled that owl out of his tree and kicked his feathery, know-it-all butt.:mad:
 
The number of licks it takes to get to the center, I've found, is inversely proportional to to the fraction you get of putting 1 over the address of the store from whence you purchased the tootsie pop.

And, oddly enough, my wife married me for the same reason, fox...
(heh, no, I'm not married, I just wanted to say that)
 
Well Hoser, it all comes down to a matter of interpretation of a lick. Assuming you think of a lick as being the tongue going from point A to point B on the sucker, with those two points not exceeding half the circumference, I can see why the women like you. I also include though (when talking about a lick) the total insertion of the sucker into ones mouth, and pulling out of that sucker, with a small amount of suction, not to reach a point to actually crack the shell, ending with a slight "pop!" It is this skill that I speak of when I say I married my wife for her ability to get to center in so little licks. :)
 
True, true, I was interpreting a "lick" as a movement of the tongue outside the mouth, or, perhaps, a movement of the tootsie pop (or other random orifice) in a vertical motion back and forth on top of the surface of the tongue, again, external from the mouth. Also, a horizontal, perhaps even "thrashing" motion (are you listening, Lina?) in quick and multiple directions would be encompassed by the "lick" - it's in no means a unidirectional motion.

What you describe, foxdvd, I would probably be inclined to classify as a "suck", i.e., working down the tootsie pop (or other random orifice) with not only the tongue, but the lips as well. This method, due to the full submersion of the tootsie pop (or other random orifice) in saliva, would be more effective at reducing it to it's chewy centre in a shorter amount of time. I'd say the reason your wife is more efficent is because she has a more effective method, probably from previous experience of some nature or another. Then again, these are all extrapolated assumptions.

(Heh. Oh dear...)
 
HoserHellspawn, I understand fully why you would call my above definition a suck. My inability to properly explain my wife’s tootsie roll consumption is my one downfall in life. What you describe as a suck, is in truth a combination lick/suck that might need a new term created.

The process begins with the insertion of the sucker into the open, willing mouth of the woman. Approximately 90 percent of the sucker enters the mouth, as her soft lips close about the sweet candy. These next steps are extremly important in understanding the difference between this process and a suck; so follow closely. At this point air pressure is removed from the mouth, entering the lungs, causing a seal to take place. The seal is only enough to keep saliva from exiting the mouth, and not enough to remove any trace particles from the sucker.

At this point the sucker is turned 180 degrees in the mouth across the base of the tongue. A slight moaning sound is made by the woman to indicate this process is taking place. The sucker is then pulled from the mouth, in a slow, deliberate process. It is important to note that no contact is made between the sucker and the roof of the mouth, because this would be indication that such an amount of air had been removed as to be called total-suction. As the final amount is pulled from the mouth, the suction process, what little was there in the first place, is completely removed, resulting in small amounts of saliva dripping down the mouth. The final step in this process is for the woman to lick her lower lip softly to remove any trace particles of candy and saliva.

I hope you can agree that this would not be a suck. I also will admit that this is not your normal definition of a lick. Maybe we can come up with a new term.
 
I both congratulate you for overcoming this great downfall, and accept your proposal.

One possiblity would be to combine the words "lick" and "suck". Examples would therefore include "sick" and "luck"... and I'm sure we can agree that the latter, "luck", is strangely appropriate, on some level. However, it is unfortunately an existing word.

Somebody please get luke some new pants...