I am indestructable...

[dill_the_devil]

So yesterday, I decided to go AWOL from my usual Saturday afternoon DJing responsibilities at the Giffard in Wolverhampton. I gather a bunch of mates and head off to Birmingham... where I rapidly proceed to spend practically the entire of my weekly wages on Strongbow, Carling, Carlsberg, double shots of Fire & Ice, Stella Artois, one can of Coke, a deck of fags, a copy of Nasum - Inhale/Exhale and an egg and bacon sandwich. Over the course of the day I drank nearly my own body weight, bought a girl I'd previously never met a black rose, got thrown out of Subculture, recommended Steve Kenney from Frost some good death metal in Scruffy Murphy's, then ended up in Solihull at the house of the girl who I bought a rose for, with my best mate, having her mom make me cups of tea and donate the electric recliner chair for me to sleep on.

I'm bunking off work more often.

 

[Nate The Great]

You used so much British jargon, I could hardly tell what language that was.

So . . . this girl . . . what's up with the black rose. Was she a goth or something?

 

[dill_the_devil]

LOL - hey, we invented the language, we can fuck with it however the hell we like!

As for the girl, yeah, she is kind of, but she has really varied music tastes it seems... anything from VNV Nation to Every Time I Die.

 

[JayKeeley]

I bet you stank like a brewery. 'Tis the Strongbow that did it, you might as well be drinking car battery acid. You need to balance that shit out with some Special Brew castor oil.

 

[dill_the_devil]

Strongbow is evil stuff, 'tis true. I'm still feeling a leeeetle bit dodgy now, but what the hell, it was a good night out! Thank goat tomorrow's a bank holiday - no work! I'm gonna go pick up an eighth and get stoned later to celebrate.

 

[Nate The Great]

Is smoking allowed in bars in the UK? The funny thing about California is that you don't smell like a smoldering pit of ash when you leave a bar . . . I kind of miss that.

 

[dill_the_devil]

Yep, we're currently still allowed to smoke in pubs, but the Nazi thought police (aka the anti-smoking lobby) are no doubt already working on that. Bleeding heart liberals have also recently caused Punch And Judy shows to come to an end because they're too violent and promote domestic abuse. I hate the moral majority.

 

[Krilons Resa]

Utoh. Sounds like England is following suit eh? Shit, Im moving to the Netherlands godamnit.

Btw, did ya get sexy with the lady friend??

 

[dill_the_devil]

LOL - nah, she's too young. I was just being charmingly extravagant because by six o' clock, all of my mates had gone to work or gone home, so I was completely on my own. She took me out, introduced me to her mates and gave me a place to crash. My best mate Jack came back out after he'd finished work and met us at two in the morning, staggering around drunkenly insulted cyber-goths and taxi drivers.

 

[Krilons Resa]

C'mon maaan..if there's grass in the field....PLAY BALL!

 

[dill_the_devil]

LMFAO - no, seriously, when I say too young, I mean she doesn't turn legal 'till next month. I'm not going down as a nonce! Besides, she fancies my mate. Hehehehe...

 

[Nate The Great]

Get 'em before the hair does . . .

 

[dill_the_devil]

*falls off chair laughing* Nah, mustn't think naughty thoughts about the teenies...

 

[NAD]

You get kicked out of places often don't you? We need to start partying together.

It's so god damn stupid that you can't smoke in bars. Get fucked up, kill your liver, contract an STD from the toilet seat, crash your car, but DON'T FUCKING SMOKE, IT'S BAD FOR YOU!!! :Smug:

 

[Nate The Great]

What's funnier is that they made ephedra illegal, but smoking is still legal. I'm all for smoking, but there's something fishy here (it's called tax revenue).

Oh . . . and if you're old enough to go to the store, you're old enough to get bread.

 

[Krilons Resa]

What's funnier is that they made ephedra illegal, but smoking is still legal. I'm all for smoking, but there's something fishy here (it's called tax revenue).

Oh . . . and if you're old enough to go to the store, you're old enough to get bread.

Don't fucking get me started on the cock-suckin' FDA!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[dill_the_devil]

You get kicked out of places often don't you? We need to start partying together.

I've been banned from the 24-hour ASDA in Wolverhampton three times in the same year, and I still keep going back.

1 - I was on a bender with the singer and bassist of now-defunct aggro-industrialists Lucys Drowning at the Slackers night in the Terrace Bar above the Wolverhampton Wanderers football ground. After spending all of my cash on Aftershocks (40% proof menthol liqour) and falling asleep on the table, the singer roused me from my slumber and we headed to go get sandwiches. As soon as I got through the revolving door, I stumbled and fell through the magazine rack. "Security!"

2 - A month later, again after a night on the booze at Slackers, I went back into the Asda. After successfully navigating the aisles and getting some chicken wings, I raise my hand and start sending the dangling overhead price signs swinging. I hit one of them rather too hard, one of the hooks comes loose and the sign swings down in an arc to crash into the fizzy pop. "Security!"

3 - Two months after that, my friends and I have been thrown out of Slackers after one of our number started an argument with the manager, who had simply asked him to put his shirt back on. Never mind, I was wasted. Off to the Asda. Through the revolving doors, swing wide past the magazine rack, stumble over my own feet and go face first into the pre-packed sandwiches. "Securi - don't I know you?"

 

[Ayeka]

LMFAO - no, seriously, when I say too young, I mean she doesn't turn legal 'till next month. I'm not going down as a nonce! Besides, she fancies my mate. Hehehehe...

A month isn't that long...

 

[dill_the_devil]

LOL - I'm 20, it's wrong! I'll just settle for encouraging her cannabis smoking and underage drinking... I'm a guide for a new generation, really.

 

[Ayeka]

Heheheh...fair cop, mate! Bring her round here and you can do it with a clean conscience