I Shot Someone Today!

[Officer Nice]

And to me they are just fat with a nippple, they're no fun. I've never known a guy to mess with them for more than 30 seconds so I think guys overdramatize their interest in (o)(o)s. Whereas penises do neat stuff and really neat stuff happens at the end. How did I go from guns to genitals?

I guess you meet guys who don't like them as much as others do

Penises do neat stuff? Well, I can make balloon animals with mine
but that's nothing to brag about...

You went from guns to penises because guns could be a phallic symbol.

-OfficerNice

 

[NapalmForLunch]

I've never shot a riffle but with my pellet gun I can shoot a hole in a slice of paper then shoot that hole again without hitting the paper from about 20 yards back.

 

[Captain Beard]

Geez, it's official, I got offered free sexual play.
Damnit, Amy would kill me... Sorry, no can do.

 

[Officer Nice]

Geez, it's official, I got offered free sexual play.
Damnit, Amy would kill me... Sorry, no can do.

you need a wingman ha ha


-OfficerNice

 

[ScientistOfDarkness]

Geez, it's official, I got offered free sexual play.
Damnit, Amy would kill me... Sorry, no can do.

Well I didn't know you had an amy. I have a cat! She's black and white and is sitting on my bed now getting fur on my black pillows.

 

[Captain Beard]

Yeah, I have a profound liking for her, so it makes me have a "conscience."

Ah well. Hey, NdX says he'll lend his to you, if you want it.

 

[mReEtTaIlRsEkD]

i clicked on this thread thiking it was anotherporno story
don't ask why

 

[PlatypusJesus]

Your cat sheds?

 

[ScientistOfDarkness]

Your cat sheds?

LOM and metalskater - Both of you!!! Dirty birdys!! specially LOM!

 

[PlatypusJesus]

You should wash it more blackwater.

 

[ScientistOfDarkness]

You should wash it more blackwater.

The well's done froze over.

 

[PlatypusJesus]

I'm sorry....I'll warm it up for you.

 

[Guerrilla]

I would like to urinate standing up. I've been out so much lately, my thighs are sore from squatting in public restrooms. Other than that, I'm content with my innie. But if I did have a penis for a day, I'd be whacking it like there was no tomorrow.

You do know there's a guide for women on how to pee standing up right? www.restrooms.org/standing.html

 

[PlatypusJesus]

I think what you meant to say was guide....guerrilla.

 

[Guerrilla]

I think what you meant to say was guide....guerrilla.

Yeah, I was thinking about hooking up with a girl and typed guy instead. Anyways, I hit the edit button before you wrote that reply.

 

[ScientistOfDarkness]

haha I didn't even notice what he originally said.

I don't think I'm going to be trying that method, but thanks anyway.

 

[PlatypusJesus]

Yeah....could get messy.

 

[Guerrilla]

I bet LoM pees sitting down. Too tired of his mom barging in when he's standing up taking a piss, only to quickly sit on the toilet and manage to get a few drops of pee on her face, before LoM can force himself to stop peeing. Golden showers are fun, but not when it's your mom you're peeing on.

 

[PlatypusJesus]

You've obviously been spying on me, Guerrilla.

 

[PlatypusJesus]

Do you know about my deepthroating giraffe?