Im going to start a black metal band.....

[spawn]

This was inspired by someone asking what black metal was....

Well, my new band Snorgabort is doing well, our first album has just been finished, with the title "Edible Botanical Miscreants: First Cycle", we wear a combination of every Kiss members makeup on our faces and all have long black hair.
Sadly, we had to sacrifice our first singer to the devil because he growled to lowly when he knew we wanted a high pitched squeal.

Song titles from our first album include:
"Gnomes In The Troll Woods"
"Black Winds Fill The Night With Darkness"
"Locrious The Destroyer Of Souls And Wells"
"Gather Forth The Masses For Redemption From Misanthropianism And Face The Wrath Of Beelzebub: Part One"
"Vampiric Succubus Instigating Fearless Nephilism From Whence They Came"
and of course, the cult classic:
"Witches Coven Of Black Souls For Timeless Necrolism And Fleshless Undead Martyrs"

We are TRUE black metal. We dont smile in photos. EVER.

We have a keyboard player. They play keyboards and look scary.

As you can see, we shall conquer the world. For all black metal must be taken seriously.

 

[phlogiston]

Locrious The Destroyer Of Souls And Wells

I love that song! Especially the bit in the middle with the drums!

 

[Joe Salami]

Spawny, you have WAAAAAAAAAAAAAY too much time on your hands.....

 

[KoichCPA]

I'm starting a Chalice cover band called Phallis, and every song is about a penis.

 

[Kem]

Hahaha Koichi. Where were you on Saturday night, we needed you up in Brisbane. I didn't watch Chalice, I just stayed out by the bar at the Gabba Hotel and drank

 

[TRrEiTxIxRiE DTrash]

Chalice suck hehe.

Hahahahahahahahha Spawny. But you aren't true enough with a keyboard player. You need to just have a guitarist/vocalist and a drummer. Bass and keyboard aren't brutal or raw enough.

Was the album recorded in a Norweigan forest in the middle of winter?

 

[KoichCPA]

I like Shiralee alot,i mean chalice...

Chalice are actually a good band,they are just well different,and shiralee is hot.

 

[Southy]

Spawny do you ever wonder if you dont have too much time on your hands??

 

[Goreripper]

You couldn't possibly be truer than Corpse Paint.

 

[spawn]

Koichi, I have to agree with you, the singer in Chalice is beyond beautiful!

Joe: Sadly you are right, I do have too much time on my hands

Troops: It was recorded in a Scandanavian forest, in winter, with no clothes on

Southy: If I dont have too much time on my hands, then god help someone who DOES!

Goreripper: Corpse Paint? I think our keyboardist killed their lead singer

 

[spawn]

Originally posted by phlogiston


I love that song! Especially the bit in the middle with the drums!

Thats my favourite bit too! (Oh no, I smiled!)

 

[Lord Tim]

FALSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Icarus]

Spawny....you should go on tour with Impaled Northern Moon Forest!

Check out some song titles:

GAZING AT THE BLASPHEMOUS MOON WHILE PERCHED ATOP A VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY FORSAKEN CREST OF THE NORTHERN MOUNTIAN

MASTURBATING ON THE UNHOLY INVERTED TRACKS OF THE GRIM & FROSTBITTEN NECROBOBSLEDDERS

LUSTFULLY WORSHIPPING THE INVERTED MOONGOAT WHILE SKIING DOWN THE INVERTED NECROMOUNTAIN OF NECRODEATHMORTUM

SUMMONING THE UNHOLY FROZEN WINTERDEMONS TO THE GRIMMEST AND MOST FROSTBITTEN INVERTED FOREST OF ABAZAGORATH

GRIM AND FROSTBITTEN GAY BAR

And thats not all! check out the album cover!

http://www.metalprovider.com/analcunt/tumb-IMPALED7''.JPG

Teehee

Oh yeah........heres a site to help you with song titles:
http://www.returntothepit.com/bullshit.html

 

[spawn]

Oh wait, I forgot, we changed our names, we are now:
Emperor Tyrannos Sharbanath Disprin (thats me of course)
Thorazine Clomenculous Demazin
Nimbus Cumulo Fortense
Zeebum Zoomonk
Soracat Jumpover Thefence and
Bumberloo Banderboom Belgord

Too much time, I just have too much time on my hands

 

[Tough As Steel]

 

[spawn]

Originally posted by Icarus
Spawny....you should go on tour with Impaled Northern Moon Forest!

Check out some song titles:

GAZING AT THE BLASPHEMOUS MOON WHILE PERCHED ATOP A VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY FORSAKEN CREST OF THE NORTHERN MOUNTIAN

MASTURBATING ON THE UNHOLY INVERTED TRACKS OF THE GRIM & FROSTBITTEN NECROBOBSLEDDERS

LUSTFULLY WORSHIPPING THE INVERTED MOONGOAT WHILE SKIING DOWN THE INVERTED NECROMOUNTAIN OF NECRODEATHMORTUM

SUMMONING THE UNHOLY FROZEN WINTERDEMONS TO THE GRIMMEST AND MOST FROSTBITTEN INVERTED FOREST OF ABAZAGORATH

GRIM AND FROSTBITTEN GAY BAR

And thats not all! check out the album cover!

http://www.metalprovider.com/analcunt/tumb-IMPALED7''.JPG

Teehee

Oh yeah........heres a site to help you with song titles:
http://www.returntothepit.com/bullshit.html

They are not TRUE! Only Snorgabort is real black metal, we are true purveyors of doom and misanthropia and bad things. Oooogy boogy boogy

 

[Southy]

hmmm just too much bloody time

 

[Kem]

Hahaha. Sorry to tell you guys but the singer is married to the drummer. She even has a kid, which is well, odd. We were hanging around outside and this guy with a little kid came up to us and asked us if we new anyone in Chalice because he had her kid. Hehehe

 

[spawn]

Typical. Bloody drummers get all the luck

 

[KoichCPA]

My hopes and dreams.gone.