DriftAlongLiquidSky
Member
- May 30, 2006
- 402
- 13
- 18
Ill be the scary and disturbing stripper that someone stupid like Sexi_Alexi hires, then i can make the whole thing really akward.
I'm Looking For a Wife...
- Thread starter derek
- Start date
Kvlt Wench
sews no mercy
I always forget how to do the grammar endings for numbers.
And I'm actually pretty good at writing in Cyrillic. My cursive rocks.
And I'm actually pretty good at writing in Cyrillic. My cursive rocks.
ScientistOfDarkness
a prophet in cosmology
Yep. I'm the caring Scotsman of the new Millenia. We only get drunk four times a week, and only beat the wife once! The kids usually escape the beating, and we usually get up for work, as opposed to claiming benefit for the leg we broke escaping from a shop robbery!
dreaming neon darkspot
natures' retard
change of plans. i'm marrying a Russian chick. we'll provide "entertainment" for the bachelor party. AND be flower girls!Nope!
So far I had one serious offer from Laura, but Will was part of the package and his goat-herding skills are negligible. Besides, her father was not happy with my bartering.
After that, the thread sorta turned into this.
I think I may just remain painfully alone.
you can still have Will, though.
Captain Beard
No longer active
- Sep 6, 2001
- 28,010
- 99
- 48
dreaming neon darkspot
natures' retard
i fixed my post gloriously, after actually reading the last 2 pages of this thread and being made aware of the turn of events.
Captain Beard
No longer active
- Sep 6, 2001
- 28,010
- 99
- 48
Yes, it appears I'll be running a stud farm in Derek and Samantha's bedroom since he'll be very drunk. Should just install guide rails for him to use.*sigh*
I took the first wife that offered herself, I could not wait!
I like this idea very very much.
ScientistOfDarkness
a prophet in cosmology
As do I. Nearly as much as the idea of the bruises to come. I imagine you're a gentleman and will stay away from the face.
Of course!
I employ only the most tried and tested techniques of Scots-Irish wife beating - Perfected over hundreds of years.
I employ only the most tried and tested techniques of Scots-Irish wife beating - Perfected over hundreds of years.
ScientistOfDarkness
a prophet in cosmology
I don't drink - all the alcohol will be yours. To aid in the beatings and making of the semi-retarded children.
ScientistOfDarkness
a prophet in cosmology
Your last name had better be Mac something, I'm not coming all this way for a Scottish husband to be Samantha Smith.
It's Patterson, actually. Which is very heartily Scottish. It's actually a varient of the Irish Paterson, but I'm not going to tell you why exactly we changed it many decades ago upon invading Scotland.
ScientistOfDarkness
a prophet in cosmology
It's Patterson, actually. Which is very heartily Scottish. It's actually a varient of the Irish Paterson, but I'm not going to tell you why exactly we changed it many decades ago upon invading Scotland.
It's better than Sadler. Which is far too English and horse related.
You're not 17 are you? I've always thought of you as being like 18. Must be the good genes. I'm still holding on to the hopes that our first son will be retarded or dwarf.
DreamNeonBlack
Member
It's Patterson, actually. Which is very heartily Scottish. It's actually a varient of the Irish Paterson, but I'm not going to tell you why exactly we changed it many decades ago upon invading Scotland.
Patterson??? Thats it?
Oh come on man, that name MUST be changed to Macpatterson or something equally as cliche.
I don't know Sammie, I'd say break the deal. But it is your call.
I say everyone begin a list of possible name changes for....< sigh > Derek Patterson
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