I'm Looking For a Wife...

[ScientistOfDarkness]

It's not built for the American palate.

I don't need to eat it, just make it. *gets ass back in the kitchen where it belongs*

 

[derek]

Oh, I can cook - You don't need to cook for me whatsoever.

I do however Like my slippers gently toasted for when I come home from work.

 

[ScientistOfDarkness]

Oh, I can cook - You don't need to cook for me whatsoever.

I do however Like my slippers gently toasted for when I come home from work.

I'll have Blitzkrieg bring them to you at the door upon your glorious return home. And the children sitting 'round the peat fire awaiting your tales of the day at work.

Reality: argue about what fast food place to have for dinner, argue about what to listen to in the car, argue about what to watch on tv, argue about who wants sex, bitch some more and fall asleep on the couch.

 

[derek]

Well, kids aside, I cook, clean rarely watch tv, will listen to anything, not sex-crazed and my bed is large and wooden and owns the couch.

yep.

 

[ScientistOfDarkness]

Well, kids aside, I cook, clean rarely watch tv, will listen to anything, not sex-crazed and my bed is large and wooden and owns the couch.

yep.

Yeah, sadly that's my current reality.


The puppy and I can be packed and ready in a week. I'm wearing jeans and a Vintersorg shirt to the wedding, if you care to coordinate.

 

[derek]

I'll just wear Jeans and a plain slate coloured t-shirt. I'm not one for band shirts.

 

[ScientistOfDarkness]

I'll just wear Jeans and a plain slate coloured t-shirt. I'm not one for band shirts.

Good. You won't steal from me.

hehe you said "coloured"

colour, theatre, loo, and post. I'm ready.

 

[derek]

EXCEPT, I hardly say any of those things.

 

[ScientistOfDarkness]

EXCEPT, I hardly say any of those things.

Well fuck. Bet you say that.

 

[derek]

Quite alot, in many different contexts. I say alot of Scottish things you won't get either.

 

[ScientistOfDarkness]

Quite alot, in many different contexts. I say alot of Scottish things you won't get either.

At least you can make it seem like you're calling me something sweet while actually insulting me.

 

[derek]

Aye, I certainly can.

What exactly are you bringing to this wedding, again?

 

[ScientistOfDarkness]

Aye, I certainly can.

What exactly are you bringing to this wedding, again?

Boobs. And cabana boys.

 

[derek]

Sold!

 

[Necromunchkin]

Ahh, wove, twue wove.

 

[ScientistOfDarkness]

Deal. We'll go over the immigration laws soon. For now, I will mentally prepare myself for the beatings and bearing of semi-retarded children.

 

[Captain Beard]

I'll be the bouncer!

 

[Necromunchkin]

I'll be bartender!

 

[ScientistOfDarkness]

I'll be the bouncer!

You can officiate. And verify that the union is consumated.

 

[Captain Beard]

"Hey, not that hole!" *pushes both of you apart* "Now try again."