Is this any good?

[Ryan M.]

So I like to write. This is something I wrote just on the spot (Sorta freestyled haha ) while chatting with a friend. It was a pretty crazy chat you could say haha!.

-[Stranger In The Mirror]-

Pollution of our twisted minds
Reflects once more in the foggy mirror
Sinful traits of many kinds
I step once more to see them clearer

A face as black as night
Before me
A harsh and foul sight
can I see

To fall for yet another lie
To watch another smile die
I fall into a lifeless dream
A place where no one's who they seem

It's name is hate
It's cold, cold eyes
Communicate
And all light dies

As a stranger I stand
In this wasted land
A stranger to myself

With blood on my hand
No I can't understand
So I put it all on the shelf

Forget the face of yesterday
His stare unending, deep
And put your mortal fears away
And face the edge of life, so steep

Tonight I stand before the edge
A dreamer standing on the ledge
I take a step into the void
And face the dream I can't avoid

This chasm of a deeper dream
This place where I'm not who I seem
Just another world within
Just another world of sin

There's a mirror
There's a face
I see clearer
MY disgrace

And reality stands before my eyes...

Like a thousand nightmares all in one!
I look towards the shattered sun!
This world is fallen... So am I!
And one day I will have to die!

So I wont waste my little life
On such a place as this
I wander down the road, no strife
To wander the abyss!

 

[M@RS]

If it weren't for the fact that it's a total rip-off of Mirror of Souls...I'd say it's awesome. xP

 

[FleshAndBloodTheocracy]

And you used "it's" incorrectly.

 

[M@RS]

No. "It is awesome" was shortened to "it's awesome".

EDIT: Lawl, nevermind. You were talking to Ryan.

 

[FleshAndBloodTheocracy]

Yes....yes I was.

 

[guitr4God]

sounds like a power metal song (which is a very good thing!)

 

[Ryan M.]

O.K. so I just noticed it IS a rippoff... Hahaha! I wrote it fast and I guess my obsession will leak through sometimes ... Hahaha!

So here are two more for ya:

-[His Game]-

Candles blown by the wind of the night
The wall dully lit by a red candlelight
He play's a tune to comfort us
He says that life is perilous

He says we must enter his game
To live forever, in his name

To avoid the wear
To avoid the tear
Of a long unending road

But a road of despair
Was I already there?
And I carry a burdensome load

"This is my game!
My pieces, you rise!
Under one name!
With fiery eyes!"

Into a sea of discontent
Under an evil covenant

Under the name
of Diabolus
He conquers the nation
Spreading mass-devastation

Within his game
Stands great Secutus
Without invitation
Taunting with damnation

"Diabolus is his name"
Says the follower of I
"Play his eerie little game
And roll the ancient cursed die"

Running from him faster
Aura, alabaster
Psychedelic midnight
Visions made of pure fright

Master of a higher power
Higher then the highest tower
Take away this nightmare, dull
Take my penalty, in full

Even though my penalty is great...


-[Where Were You?]-

Sometimes I feel like dying
I see no point in trying

Where is the blue sky
After the rain
All I do is lie
To cloak the pain

In the distance, a rain cloud
I hear the watchers crying
And I can hear them, so loud
Again, no point in lying

I will never be the same
As days pass, I must face it
That this great pain is but a game
And the source of pain, I'll trace it

Where were you when I was calling?
Where were you at the break of dawn?
Where were you when I was falling?
Will you be here when they are gone?

A fallen angel’s hymn of war
Another dark immortal
Another chant, I bare no more
A step beyond this portal

And all I see is darkness!!!!

Wait!
What's that sound?
But another taunting of the damned?

Fate!
We are bound!
Fallen like the walls we've rammed!

But a voice in the darkness I heard...

"As the walls are closing
In on you
My presence, juxtaposing
Will get you through"

And a peace has dawned on my soul
As if the shadows have turned to light
And even though these times are dull
You will conquer the dead of the night

A bridge to fill the great divide
A prison wall destroyed
I walk towards the other side
I run, so overjoyed

And the darkness surrounding is but a shadow of the past...

You were there when I was calling!
You were there at the break of dawn!
You were there when I was falling!
You were there when they were gone!

Though my friends may leave me, true
I can always run to you

The king above all kings!
The bringer of the light!
The ruler of all things!
Who rules above the night!

 

[M@RS]

You should seriously write lyrics for a power / progressive metal band. That was awesome.

 

[Feoreunn]

"Where Were You?" is especially great. I can imagine some melodies when reading it.

 

[Ryan M.]

You should seriously write lyrics for a power / progressive metal band. That was awesome.

IF there was a band wanting a lyricist... I would haha

Thanks guys for the feedback on my last 2 haha!