From The White House:
We at Americans For Purity hope that you never have to deal with the tragic heartbreak of a child who Masturbates. But the sad fact is, Masturbation is rampant among today's youth. The first step towards dealing with a problem is to recognize that the problem exists. Here are some of the most common warning signs that your child may be Masturbating.
1. Does your teenager have acne? Masturbation often leads to excessive hormone production, which is the cause of acne. Very few teenagers who don't Masturbate have acne.
2. Is your teenager depressed? If a teenager acts sullen, withdrawn or unhappy the most likely cause is Chronic Masturbation.
3. Does your child lock his or her bedroom door? It is not healthy for a teen to want privacy. Chances are he or she is in there Masturbating!
4. Does your child listen to "Rock And Roll" music? If a teenager has rebelled against God far enough to listen to the Devil's music, then he or she has almost certainly rebelled enough to try Masturbation.
5. Are there semen stains on your son's bed sheets or underwear? There's only one way they could have gotten there! Line up all of your sons at least twice a day for a family Prayer Meeting and Underwear Check!
6. Does your teenager have Liberal political opinions? The weakness of mind brought on by Self-Abuse often leads to left-wing sympathies.
hahahaha
7. Does your child wear fashionable clothing or hairstyles? If your child can't resist the peer pressure to look a certain way, he or she probably can't resist the peer pressure to Masturbate, either.
8. Does your child look guilty or deny Masturbating? Very few teenagers will openly admit to Masturbating!
9. Have you caught your child Masturbating? If you walk into your son's bedroom without knocking and he's in there with his pants down holding his erect penis, he's probably Masturbating.
We at Americans For Purity hope that you never have to deal with the tragic heartbreak of a child who Masturbates. But the sad fact is, Masturbation is rampant among today's youth. The first step towards dealing with a problem is to recognize that the problem exists. Here are some of the most common warning signs that your child may be Masturbating.
1. Does your teenager have acne? Masturbation often leads to excessive hormone production, which is the cause of acne. Very few teenagers who don't Masturbate have acne.
2. Is your teenager depressed? If a teenager acts sullen, withdrawn or unhappy the most likely cause is Chronic Masturbation.
3. Does your child lock his or her bedroom door? It is not healthy for a teen to want privacy. Chances are he or she is in there Masturbating!
4. Does your child listen to "Rock And Roll" music? If a teenager has rebelled against God far enough to listen to the Devil's music, then he or she has almost certainly rebelled enough to try Masturbation.
5. Are there semen stains on your son's bed sheets or underwear? There's only one way they could have gotten there! Line up all of your sons at least twice a day for a family Prayer Meeting and Underwear Check!
6. Does your teenager have Liberal political opinions? The weakness of mind brought on by Self-Abuse often leads to left-wing sympathies.
hahahaha 7. Does your child wear fashionable clothing or hairstyles? If your child can't resist the peer pressure to look a certain way, he or she probably can't resist the peer pressure to Masturbate, either.
8. Does your child look guilty or deny Masturbating? Very few teenagers will openly admit to Masturbating!
9. Have you caught your child Masturbating? If you walk into your son's bedroom without knocking and he's in there with his pants down holding his erect penis, he's probably Masturbating.
