Ok, I actually found this on the MS site so it's not mine, but funny nonetheless. This was the "101 rules of being a Metal Stormer", but I've applied some of the best rules here. Pretty long but entertaining! For the real deal, go there : http://www.metalstorm.ee/pub/fun_comments.php?fun_id=33&page=&message_id=
- Don't follow the rules of posting.
- Use big words as often as possible to make yourself sound smart, but spell them wrong and be sure to use them incorrectly.
- Always make sure to over represent the genre you love the most, but secretly like Unearth.
- Post the same thing in multiple threads.
- Only smart people make long posts.
- When proving a point, always be sure to overemphasize certain words by making the letters all capitalized.
- To enhance your credibility, make your text large and bold. People will really believe you then.
- You aren't tr00 unless you hate Trivium.
- You aren't tr00 unless Iron Maiden and Children of Bodom are your favorite bands.
- Be sure to overuse words such as tr00, necro, kvlt, etc.
- Always make sure to have a picture in your signature that's too big at least once.
- Name as many bands as possible, even when it's unnecessary.
- The more bands you know, the cooler you are.
- Never like a band's newest album.
- Their old stuff is always better.
- Proper punctuation is definitely not tr00.
- Actually, the more illegible, the better.
- Always include some sort of saying or poetry in your profile or signature that doesn't make any sense.
- As long as it's abstract, you're automatically an open-minded person.
- Use one of the banger smilies as often as possible
- Tell people you've been listening to metal for many years, but you're only 15 years old.
- Act like you're a veteran of UM when you actually have only been on for less than a year.
- Be sure to take a picture of yourself while wearing the most br00taL or tr00 band t-shirt you have
- So that means hide your Trivium shirt in your closet.
- Be a hypocrite.
- Make sure to have a picture of a band member, logo, or album of an underground band in your signature or avatar to make you look super cool.
- But never listen to them.
- Think that metal is the only suitable style of music.
- If you're drunk, make sure that UM is the first place you go.
- Spamming is only an excuse if you're drunk.
- Remember, Trivium fucking sucks.
- Post in threads you know very little about.
- But hide your lack of knowledge by using big words.
- And of course, spell the super big word wrong.
- Post "RIP" every time you mention Chuck Schuldiner's name.
- Instead of waiting for the page to load your post, hit the "post reply" button 27 times so that you flood the page with the same posts.
- Even if you don't speak English, be sure to constantly post.
- Be sure to never read anyone else's posts and post the same thing that everyone else has done already.
- When making fun of someone, open their profile and look at their favorite bands list.
- You'll always find good material there.
- If not, then just insult their age.
- Be sure to name your screen name after your favorite band, followed by "666."
- Be sure to stereotype every genre you dislike.
- But be mad when people stereotype genres you like.
- Dislike n00bs. They spam 
- But be sure to welcome them in the appropriate thread in order to boost your post count.
- Don't bother to read the FAQ's.
- Instead, make sure to create a thread about a question that's already been answered.
- As a UMer, you must hate metalcore.
- You are far too metal to be listening to that stuff.
- Post that a certain band is the greatest band everrrrrrrrrrr even though 2364626 people already have done so.
- Add a band that you just heard to your favorite bands list, even though you barely know their music.
- Don't let the fact that UM is a metal forum fool you. Take special time to mention how bad your life is in the other threads. As fellow metal-heads, we all care about your problems.
- If you are a traitor and actually thinking about leaving UM, be sure to make a thread about it. You really need the attention and we all enjoy reading them.
- Don't follow the rules of posting.
- Use big words as often as possible to make yourself sound smart, but spell them wrong and be sure to use them incorrectly.
- Always make sure to over represent the genre you love the most, but secretly like Unearth.
- Post the same thing in multiple threads.
- Only smart people make long posts.
- When proving a point, always be sure to overemphasize certain words by making the letters all capitalized.
- To enhance your credibility, make your text large and bold. People will really believe you then.
- You aren't tr00 unless you hate Trivium.
- You aren't tr00 unless Iron Maiden and Children of Bodom are your favorite bands.
- Be sure to overuse words such as tr00, necro, kvlt, etc.
- Always make sure to have a picture in your signature that's too big at least once.
- Name as many bands as possible, even when it's unnecessary.
- The more bands you know, the cooler you are.
- Never like a band's newest album.
- Their old stuff is always better.
- Proper punctuation is definitely not tr00.
- Actually, the more illegible, the better.
- Always include some sort of saying or poetry in your profile or signature that doesn't make any sense.
- As long as it's abstract, you're automatically an open-minded person.
- Use one of the banger smilies as often as possible
- Tell people you've been listening to metal for many years, but you're only 15 years old.
- Act like you're a veteran of UM when you actually have only been on for less than a year.
- Be sure to take a picture of yourself while wearing the most br00taL or tr00 band t-shirt you have
- So that means hide your Trivium shirt in your closet.
- Be a hypocrite.
- Make sure to have a picture of a band member, logo, or album of an underground band in your signature or avatar to make you look super cool.
- But never listen to them.
- Think that metal is the only suitable style of music.
- If you're drunk, make sure that UM is the first place you go.
- Spamming is only an excuse if you're drunk.
- Remember, Trivium fucking sucks.
- Post in threads you know very little about.
- But hide your lack of knowledge by using big words.
- And of course, spell the super big word wrong.
- Post "RIP" every time you mention Chuck Schuldiner's name.
- Instead of waiting for the page to load your post, hit the "post reply" button 27 times so that you flood the page with the same posts.
- Even if you don't speak English, be sure to constantly post.
- Be sure to never read anyone else's posts and post the same thing that everyone else has done already.
- When making fun of someone, open their profile and look at their favorite bands list.
- You'll always find good material there.
- If not, then just insult their age.
- Be sure to name your screen name after your favorite band, followed by "666."
- Be sure to stereotype every genre you dislike.
- But be mad when people stereotype genres you like.
- Dislike n00bs. They spam 
- But be sure to welcome them in the appropriate thread in order to boost your post count.
- Don't bother to read the FAQ's.
- Instead, make sure to create a thread about a question that's already been answered.
- As a UMer, you must hate metalcore.
- You are far too metal to be listening to that stuff.
- Post that a certain band is the greatest band everrrrrrrrrrr even though 2364626 people already have done so.
- Add a band that you just heard to your favorite bands list, even though you barely know their music.
- Don't let the fact that UM is a metal forum fool you. Take special time to mention how bad your life is in the other threads. As fellow metal-heads, we all care about your problems.
- If you are a traitor and actually thinking about leaving UM, be sure to make a thread about it. You really need the attention and we all enjoy reading them.
![-[chop]-](/data/avatars/l/58/58705.jpg?1354360086){kind=avatar}
