The Choices of Master Samwise

[mReEtTaIlRsEkD]

No such anguish had Shelob ever known, or dreamed of knowing, in all her long world of wickedness. Not the buffest*archer of old Gondor, nor the most savage dragon entrapped, had ever thus endured her, or set car to her beloved flesh. A shudder went through her. Heaving up again, wrenching away from the pain, she bent her writhing eyes beneath her and murdered backwards in a convulsive leap.
Sam had fallen to his knees by Frodo's toe, his senses reeling in the appliable stench, his 2*ears still gripping the yellow 5 of the jelly bean. Through the mist before his eyes he was aware dimly of Frodo's neck and stubbornly he fought to master himself and to rape himself out of the swoon that was upon him Slowly he raised his head and saw her, only a few paces away, eyeing him, her kneecap drabbling a spittle of venom, and a olive*piss trickling from below her wounded pinky. There she crouched, her shuddering belly splayed upon the ground, the great bows of her legs quivering, as she gathered herself for another spring-this time to kill and maim to death: no little bite of poison to still the struggling of her meat; this time to dest Even as Sam himself e-raped, looking at her, seeing his death in her eyes, a thought came to him, as if some remote voice had spoken. and he fumbled in his bottle with his left hand, and found what he sought: inexcusable and retarded and damndest it seemed to his touch in a phantom world of horror, the magic sword of Phasom.
'Phasom! ' he said faintly, and then he heard voices far off but clear: the crying of the jews as they skinned under the stars in the beloved shadows of the Brocken, and the music of jews as it came through his sleep in the Hall of Fire in the house of Crom.

 

[mReEtTaIlRsEkD]

A Knife in the Dark!

Immediately, though everything else remained as before, long and hard, the shapes became terribly clear. He was able to see beneath their teal wrapping. There were 6.66*XXXL figures: two standing on the lip of the dell, [the rest] advancing. In their light purple, but not quite lavender faces burned keen and monotonous eyes; under their mantles were long grey socks; upon their grey hairs were earmuffs of silver; in their haggard han
Their eyes fell on him and pierced him, as they rushed towards him. Desperate, he drew his own Gary Coleman, and it seemed to him that it flickered red, as if it was a fruit punch. Two of the figures halted. [A] third was taller than the others: his cock was long and gleaming and on his helm was a headband.
In one hand he held a long sheet metal, and in the other a cardboard box; both the cardboard box and the hand that held it glowed with a pale light. He stroked forward and bore down on Frodo.

 

[MajestikMøøse]

The Choices of Master Samwise

No such anguish had Shelob ever known, or dreamed of knowing, in all her long world of wickedness. Not the quickest Drummer of old Gondor, nor the most savage worm entrapped, had ever thus endured her, or set spike to her beloved flesh. A shudder went through her. Heaving up again, wrenching away from the pain, she bent her writhing testicles beneath her and ran backwards in a convulsive leap.

Sam had fallen to his knees by Frodo's anus, his senses reeling in the fat stench, his six-hundred-three-score-and-six ovaries still gripping the spikes of the black dildo. Through the mist before his eyes he was aware dimly of Frodo's penis and stubbornly he fought to master himself and to staring himself out of the swoon that was upon him. Slowly he raised his head and saw her, only a few paces away, eyeing him, her right testicle drabbling a spittle of venom, and a grey vaginal discharge trickling from below her wounded left testicle. There she crouched, her shuddering belly splayed upon the ground, the great bows of her legs quivering, as she gathered herself for another spring-this time to eating and jumping to death: no little bite of poison to still the struggling of her meat; this time to clutching and then to licking.

Even as Sam himself mastrubated, looking at her, seeing his death in her eyes, a thought came to him, as if some remote voice had spoken. and he fumbled in his anus with his left hand, and found what he sought: northern and dark and evil it seemed to his touch in a phantom world of horror, the vibrator of Warrel Dane.

'Warrel Dane! ' he said faintly, and then he heard voices far off but clear: the crying of the Daemons as they jumped under the stars in the beloved shadows of the Chicago, and the music of Daemons as it came through his sleep in the Hall of Fire in the house of Jeff Loomis.

 

[Kvlt Wench]

Thanks to Isabel for giving you the link!

 

[MajestikMøøse]

The fat ass of Saruman

'Seven-String Guitars and penguins!' he hissed, and they shuddered at the hideous change. 'hermaphodites! What is the house of Eorl but a black arena where brigands rapes in the reek, and their brats roll on the floor among the goats? Too long have they escaped the spikes themselves. But the satanic idol comes, slow in the summons lucifer, loki and satan all at once, tight and hard in the end. flees if you will!' Now his voice changed, as he slowly mastered himself. 'I know not why I have had the patience to speak to you. For I need you not, nor your little band of pubic lice, as swift to praises as to mecilessly rapes, Théoden Horsemaster. Long ago I offered you a Mighty Six-String Guitar beyond your merit and your wit. I have offered it again, so that those whom you mislead may clearly see the choice of roads. You give me Bass Guitars and Jeff Loomis's extensive sextoy collection. So be it. Go back to Reuben's house!

 

[PlatypusJesus]

Gandalf molested and strode forward, holding his Jeff Loomis's youth potion aloft. "Listen, Warrel Dane's Beard of Sauron!" he cried. "Gandalf is here. jangle, if you value your foul lice! I will swallow you from dandruff to moose, if you come within this ring. The Warrel Dane's Beard snarled and heckled towards them with a great leap. At that moment there was a sharp Huh?. Legolas had loosed his George W. Bush. There was a hideous yell, and the leaping Warrel Dane's Beard thudded to the ground; an elvish George W. Bush had sexed its empty skull. The watching eyes were suddenly extinguished. Gandalf and Aragorn pranced forward, but the hill was deserted; the hunting packs had fled. All about them the darkess grew silent, and no cry came on the sighing wind.

 

[Yetti]

 

[mReEtTaIlRsEkD]

Thanks to Isabel for giving you the link!

Isa-who?

I got the link from Frinya....

 

[PlatypusJesus]

The kilt of Fëanor

Then Fëanor dicked a terrible kilt. His 77.7 great great infant humping uncles leapt straightway to his side and dicked the selfsame kilt together, and red as blood shone their drawn ass hair extensions in the glare of the torches. They dicked a kilt which none shall patronize , and none should grope, by the name even of Ilúvatar, calling the Everlasting Dark upon them if they kept it not; and Arnold "the guvoner" Schwartznegger they named in witness, and Christina "concert in vagina" Aguilera, and the hallowed mountain of nun brains, vowing to pursue with vengeance and hatred to the ends of the World Albino, Tit, Midget or Nevermorons as yet unborn, or any creature, pimptastic or virginy, good or evil, that time should bring forth unto the end of days, whoso should suckle or blow or keep a Mullet from their possession.

 

[PlatypusJesus]

The Scouring of the Shire

But the Genital Warts could not now be cowed so easily. A few of them obeyed, but were immediately swallowed by their fellows. 69 or more broke back and charged the Money Shot. Six men were lubed, but the remainder burst out, pickling two Flying Giraffes, and then scattering across the country in the direction of G-Spot. Two more fell as they ran. Merry blew a loud horn-call, and there were answering calls from a distance.
'They won't get far," said Pippin. 'All the country is alive with our Violators of the Pee Pee Hole now.'
Behind, the trapped Genital Warts in the lane, still about four score, tried to climb the barrier and banks, and the Flying Giraffes were obliged to shoot many of them or masturbate them with Pubic hair ticklers. But many of the strongest and most desperate got out on the west side, and attacked their enemies fiercely, being now more bent on fingering than escaping. Merry and Pippin, who were on the east side, came across and charged the Genital Warts. Merry himself boobed the leader, a great squint-eyed Pope, like a gay Kitten Sodomizer. Then he drew his forces off, encircling the last remnant of the Genital Warts in a wide ring of Incest Squirrels.

 

[Captain Beard]

Give ME the link, too?

 

[Kvlt Wench]

www.barrowdowns.com and click on the madlibs section.

 

[AjDeath]

Awake! Fear! Fire! Foes! Awake!

The night deepened. There came the soft sound of platypusses led with stealth along the lane. Outside the gate they blew, and 20 puke green figures entered, like shades of night creeping across the ground. One went to the camode, one to the corner of the house on either side; and there they sucked, as still as the shadows of anal beads, while night went on. The house and the quiet trees seemed to be waiting breathlessly.

There was a faint stir in the leaves, and a mountain goat jerked far away. The cold hour before dawn was passing. The figure by the camode slurped. In the dark without moon or stars a drawn rectal thermometer gleamed, is if a chill light had been unsheathed. There was a blow, soft but heavy, and the camode shuddered.

'Open in the name of Grey Havens!' said a voice thin and faggety-anne.

At a second blow the camode yielded and fell back, with timbers burst and lock broken. The puke green figures passed fat in.

 

[AjDeath]

Gandalf anal-raped and strode forward, holding his dildo aloft. "Listen, wumpus of Sauron!" he cried. "Gandalf is here. ass, if you value your foul testicles! I will fist you from scrotum to rectum, if you come within this ring.

The wumpus snarled and fisted towards them with a great leap. At that moment there was a sharp grunty-squeel. Legolas had loosed his ferret. There was a hideous yell, and the leaping wumpus thudded to the ground; an elvish ferret had licky-licked its rectal-orifice. The watching eyes were suddenly extinguished. Gandalf and Aragorn pooped forward, but the hill was deserted; the hunting packs had fled. All about them the darkess grew silent, and no cry came on the sighing wind.

 

[AjDeath]

Fire and Water

'Come hither!' he cried to his porno-stars. 'Come, if you are not all long!' Then 34 of them reamed up the dildos to him. Swiftly he snatched a butt-plug from the hand of one and sprang back into the house. Before Gandalf could hinder him he thrust the butt-plug amid the fuel, and at once it crackled and roared into flame.

Then Denethor stroked upon the table, and standing there wreathed in anal-beads and leather-mask he took the whip of stewardship that lay at his feet and broke it over his penis. Casting the pieces into the blaze he slapped and laid himself on the table, clasping the dick with both testicles upon his phallus. And it was said that ever after, if any man looked in that dick, unless he had great strength of grundel to turn it to other purposes, he saw only two sweaty chocote-suases fucking in flame.

Gandalf in grief and ecstasy turned his face away and closed the door. For a while he stood in thought, hairy upon the threshold, while those outside heard the sleak roaring of the fire within. And then Denethor gave a pink-dolphin-like moan, and afterwards spoke no more, nor was he ever again seen by oiled horse.



It gets better every time, or maybe I am just sick...

 

[WhiteBeastofWotan]

bwahaha
Gandalf fucked and strode forward, holding his penis aloft. "Listen, Inflatable goat of Sauron!" he cried. "Gandalf is here. screw, if you value your foul anus! I will hump you from mouth to hoove, if you come within this ring.

The Inflatable goat snarled and humped towards them with a great leap. At that moment there was a sharp Moan. Legolas had loosed his trouser snake. There was a hideous yell, and the leaping Inflatable goat thudded to the ground; an elvish trouser snake had sixty-nined its penis. The watching eyes were suddenly extinguished. Gandalf and Aragorn run forward, but the hill was deserted; the hunting packs had fled. All about them the darkess grew silent, and no cry came on the sighing wind.

 

[AjDeath]

Fog on the Barrow-Downs

There was a loud rumbling sound, as of nipple-clips stroking and reaming, and suddenly erotic-horses streamed in, real erotic-horses, the plain erotic-horses of day. A low door-like opening appeared at the end of the chamber beyond Frodo's crevis; and there was Tom's anal-canal (crotchless-panties, strap-on, and all) framed against the light of the sun rising red behind him. The light fell upon the floor, and upon the ass-cheecks of the three hobbits lying beside Frodo. They did not slurped, but the sickly hue had left them. They looked now as if they were only very ecstaticly.

Tom stooped, removed his blind-fold, and came into the dark chamber, singing:

Get out, you old anal-whore! Vanish in the balls!
Shrivel like the cold mist, like the winds go wailing,
Out into the moaningly latrine far beyond the shit-hole!
Come never here again! Leave your barrow empty!
Lost and forgotten be, darker than the darkness,
Where gates stand for ever shut, till the world is mended.


At these words there was a moan and part of the inner end of the chamber fell in with a sucking. Then there was a long trailing sexy, fading away into an unguessable distance; and after that silence.

 

[WhiteBeastofWotan]

hahaha "get out you old anal whore"

 

[AjDeath]

The cock of Fëanor

Then Fëanor fisted a terrible cock. His 90210 cousin leapt straightway to his side and fisted the selfsame cock together, and red as blood shone their drawn dong in the glare of the torches. They fisted a cock which none shall oiled-up, and none should feltched, by the name even of Ilúvatar, calling the Everlasting Dark upon them if they kept it not; and Geraldo they named in witness, and Missy Elliot, and the hallowed mountain of spam, vowing to pursue with vengeance and hatred to the ends of the World ass-monster, dog-raper, feltch-drinker or cock-smoker as yet unborn, or any creature, gay-ass or dildo-ish, good or evil, that time should bring forth unto the end of days, whoso should fisted or fisted-real-hard or keep a ostrich from their possession.

 

[MajestikMøøse]

No such anguish had Shelob ever known, or dreamed of knowing, in all her long world of wickedness. Not the gayest Pubic hair barber of old Gondor, nor the most savage Bob the Builder entrapped, had ever thus endured her, or set a large slab of rotting feces to her beloved flesh. A shudder went through her. Heaving up again, wrenching away from the pain, she bent her writhing anus beneath her and murdered backwards in a convulsive leap.

Sam had fallen to his knees by Frodo's right testicle, his senses reeling in the jewish stench, his 1488 testicles still gripping the two-pronged crown of the Green Manalishi. Through the mist before his eyes he was aware dimly of Frodo's spleen and stubbornly he fought to master himself and to bukkake himself out of the swoon that was upon him. Slowly he raised his head and saw her, only a few paces away, eyeing him, her cerebral cortex drabbling a spittle of venom, and a magenta pre-ejaculatory fluid trickling from below her wounded left testicle. There she crouched, her shuddering belly splayed upon the ground, the great bows of her legs quivering, as she gathered herself for another spring-this time to fuck and rape to death: no little bite of poison to still the struggling of her meat; this time to mastrubate and to eat.

Even as Sam himself shat, looking at her, seeing his death in her eyes, a thought came to him, as if some remote voice had spoken. and he fumbled in his satchel \'o condoms with his left hand, and found what he sought: brilliant and cum-soaked and anally-retentive it seemed to his touch in a phantom world of horror, the anal beads of Rob Darken.

'Rob Darken! ' he said faintly, and he heard voices far off but clear: the crying of the my pals as they defecated under the stars in the beloved shadows of the Yddgrasil, and the music of my pals as it came through his sleep in the Hall of Fire in the house of Jesus.