Worst thing youve heard in bed?
- Thread starter Starscream
- Start date
Hopkins-WitchfinderGeneral
we are children of god
Don Corleone
Emre
well, she had actually said it in a naive way...she was quite inexperienced after all.
anyways, everything was settled in a few minutes. hehe.
anyways, everything was settled in a few minutes. hehe.
Lolita Vampiriá
Sister of Mercy
I like facials if I can/ I am allowed to wash my face afterwards... 
But what are the worst things I've heard during sex:
- One (or two...) of my ex b/f:s wouldn't want to go down on me - I can't remember what was his excuse though... So no wonder we broke up.
- After the intercourse the man says: "I'm too tired to do anything for you, let's go to sleep". This has happened more than once... :Smug:
Women need satisfaction too.
But what are the worst things I've heard during sex:
- One (or two...) of my ex b/f:s wouldn't want to go down on me - I can't remember what was his excuse though... So no wonder we broke up.
- After the intercourse the man says: "I'm too tired to do anything for you, let's go to sleep". This has happened more than once... :Smug:
Women need satisfaction too.
Hopkins-WitchfinderGeneral
we are children of god
Lolita Vampiriá
Sister of Mercy
Eirik
Progressive Viking
I second Lina on the "you like that, bitch?" thing.. it's a turnoff
no.. nobody's done that to me
no.. nobody's done that to me
Pancakes
whatta guy
The worst thing I ever heard in bed was Sasquatchvagina moaning. The best thing was Lina moaning; but alas, that was just a fantasy
My sister's heard all the ribs on one side of her body dislocate after she rolled over in bed, once.
My sister's heard all the ribs on one side of her body dislocate after she rolled over in bed, once.
Silver Sable
The Silver Goddess
Well... not exactly the worst that I've heard, but more of a whole experience and all...
Long LONG time ago, the guy gets his jollies after approx 3.4 minutes, and to be "considerate" tries to use his hands to kinda finish what he couldn't do otherwise... after about a minute or so of that, this horrible blank look crosses his face like he is wondering how many hitpoints a frost giant has... and then he noticed his hair is all stuck to his face because he is sweaty, and he began to wipe his face, but he realized where his hands had been, and looked all disgusted like he was contaminated, and thus tried to blow the hair out of his face and kinda made a sound like an elephant.
At that point I said give up, and went to shower (and do the job myself).
Long LONG time ago, the guy gets his jollies after approx 3.4 minutes, and to be "considerate" tries to use his hands to kinda finish what he couldn't do otherwise... after about a minute or so of that, this horrible blank look crosses his face like he is wondering how many hitpoints a frost giant has... and then he noticed his hair is all stuck to his face because he is sweaty, and he began to wipe his face, but he realized where his hands had been, and looked all disgusted like he was contaminated, and thus tried to blow the hair out of his face and kinda made a sound like an elephant.
At that point I said give up, and went to shower (and do the job myself).
veil the sky
Lexicon V
Lolita Vampiriá said:I like facials if I can/ I am allowed to wash my face afterwards...
now that's the difference between a girl and a woman right there folks..... *sniff* right there.....
Pancakes
whatta guy
She has something called ellehrs dunloss syndrome, or something like that. Genetic disease, makes all of her joints really weak.Nogie said:holy shit thats possible??
Saqlevurasha
Sadistic Creampuff
veil the sky
Lexicon V
Lolita Vampiriá
Sister of Mercy
Quote: Originally Posted by Lolita Vampiriá
I like facials if I can/ I am allowed to wash my face afterwards...
I like facials if I can/ I am allowed to wash my face afterwards...
veil TEH sky:
now that's the difference between a girl and a woman right there folks..... *sniff* right there.....
So I ain't a woman if I wash my face? :zombie:
DotNoir
Nyhverö
No, you should never ever wash your face again...
Hmmm... the worst thing... maybe "that looks like a fish" WTF?!?!??! But she didn't mean it in a bad way, or so she told me...
Hmmm... the worst thing... maybe "that looks like a fish" WTF?!?!??!
But she didn't mean it in a bad way, or so she told me...
veil the sky
Lexicon V
Nogie said:he meant that you ARE a woman cuz you like "facials" and girls would go ew ew ew.
i think thats what he meant anyway.
and allow me to add: ew ew ew
yeh that's what i meant. and don't worry lolly, i'll clean your face for you... like a mother cat cleans her kittens.
Lolita Vampiriá
Sister of Mercy
TheSilentMan
Silent Knight
I felt this would be a good place to post this... since it is kinda on topic here:
30 Harsh things a Woman can say to a naked Man
1. I've smoked fatter joints than that.
2. Ahhhh, it's cute.
3. Why don't we just cuddle?
4. You know they have surgery to fix that.
5. Make it dance.
6. Can I paint a smiley face on it?
7. Wow, and your feet are so big.
8. It's OK, we'll work around it.
9. Will it squeak if I squeeze it?
10. Oh no... a flash headache.
11. (giggle and point)
12. Can I be honest with you?
13. How sweet, you brought incense.
14. This explains your car.
15. Maybe if we water it, it'll grow.
16. Why is God punishing me?
17. At least this won't take long.
18. I never saw one like that before.
19. But it still works, right?
20. It looks so unused.
21. Maybe it looks better in natural light.
22. Why don't we skip right to the cigarettes?
23. Are you cold?
24. If you get me real drunk first.
25. Is that an optical illusion?
26. What is that?
27. It's a good thing you have so many other talents.
28. Does it come with an air pump?
29. So this is why you're supposed to judge people on personality.
30. I guess this makes me the early bird.
30 Harsh things a Woman can say to a naked Man
1. I've smoked fatter joints than that.
2. Ahhhh, it's cute.
3. Why don't we just cuddle?
4. You know they have surgery to fix that.
5. Make it dance.
6. Can I paint a smiley face on it?
7. Wow, and your feet are so big.
8. It's OK, we'll work around it.
9. Will it squeak if I squeeze it?
10. Oh no... a flash headache.
11. (giggle and point)
12. Can I be honest with you?
13. How sweet, you brought incense.
14. This explains your car.
15. Maybe if we water it, it'll grow.
16. Why is God punishing me?
17. At least this won't take long.
18. I never saw one like that before.
19. But it still works, right?
20. It looks so unused.
21. Maybe it looks better in natural light.
22. Why don't we skip right to the cigarettes?
23. Are you cold?
24. If you get me real drunk first.
25. Is that an optical illusion?
26. What is that?
27. It's a good thing you have so many other talents.
28. Does it come with an air pump?
29. So this is why you're supposed to judge people on personality.
30. I guess this makes me the early bird.
Alex78
Fretbuzz Virtuoso
I hear techno music coming from the appartement below me _every_ morning. I use earplugs because of that, but it's still annoying, cause I wake up then. god I could kill that someone.
unfortunately my arguments are a bit weak, because I usually sleep until 10 am, and the music starts at 8, and well, thats the time ordinary people are already awake
unfortunately my arguments are a bit weak, because I usually sleep until 10 am, and the music starts at 8, and well, thats the time ordinary people are already awake
Black Dragon
Longest Here
I had a g/f that would fart sometimes when she was having an orgasm. One time it as quite juicy, she went 'uhheeruh!' at the same time.
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