attn: creative people

i honestly encourage you to engage in a maddening experience. i don't mean trying to get toby to come pick you up on time, but rather something like sleep deprivation, fasting, hallucinogenic drugs, excessive physical activity, or something that can shake up your mind a bit and that you actually need to recover from.
 
okay #1 and 2 are no strange concepts to me. considering hallucinogens still makes me a little skittish, the physical activity thing, maybe, but i can't say i don't do that either.

yeah what i think i need is some incentive. like a headstand.
 
boredom and inner tension puts me to sleep. it keeps me on a schedule, eating, etc. total chemical routine, thus, prison. my entire life i've been like this, and i wonder if it's some sort of childhood surgery/trauma survival mechanism that kicked in and never left. never will leave. i hate it.

thus, i doubt i can physically keep myself awake for 5 days w/o chemical assistance. narcolepsy will kick in.

i can stay awake for obscene amounts of time if i'm really upset though. usually this surrounds drama, but if someone wants to chop my face or leg off, have at it.
 
antennatrash: remember when i thought there was a stone baby growing inside of me?

antennatrash: what the fuck was wrong with me?

archives key:hehee

antennatrash: that was stupid, now that i think about it

archives key: correction: you thought it was an immaculately conceived stone baby