I was remembering earlier some of the ridiculous misconceptions I had about the world when I was a little tyke. Specifically, when I was about of nursery school age (no older than five, barley old enough to remember). I'm sure that I had many, but the ones that I recalled today were:
- When I was very little, we visited my Pop-Pop (maternal Grandfather) a lot. He was from Queens and lived close to JFK, so I got to see a lot of very low flying planes when I was there. Therefore, I concluded that planes in New York where a lot bigger than planes in Pennsylvania. A lot bigger.
- I was also at Pop-Pop's when I came to the conclusion that blue and purple had been switched. I was coloring with my cousin, and I recall picking up or being handed a purple crayon, when the color I really desired was blue, which, as far as I was concerned, was called purple. Logically, I concluded that whoever was in charge of the colors had decided that blue and purple should swap names. I was annoyed, because I liked blue when it was called purple and I liked purple when it was called blue. This one, now, probably confuses me the most, because I have no idea where the fuck I got the idea that blue was originally called purple and vice versa.
- I thought there were two number tens. That is, when you were counting, you'd come to the number ten twice, since it obviously existed twice. My rationale for this was that ten was obviously the hugest number there was. In nursery school, that's about as high as you count, and that's how many fingers you have, so it made sense to me. Ten was the difference between being a kid and being a grownup. When you were ten, you were a grownup, like my Dad. I also knew that my big brother was ten, and that he was clearly not a grownup. Therefore, I concluded that there was two tens, and I told this to my Dad (who responded by saying "okay"). I thought this was a dumb and confusing system.
So, what were some of your bizarre childhood misconceptions? And "I used to think there was a God LOL" doesn't count. Sorry, Cookiecutter.
- When I was very little, we visited my Pop-Pop (maternal Grandfather) a lot. He was from Queens and lived close to JFK, so I got to see a lot of very low flying planes when I was there. Therefore, I concluded that planes in New York where a lot bigger than planes in Pennsylvania. A lot bigger.
- I was also at Pop-Pop's when I came to the conclusion that blue and purple had been switched. I was coloring with my cousin, and I recall picking up or being handed a purple crayon, when the color I really desired was blue, which, as far as I was concerned, was called purple. Logically, I concluded that whoever was in charge of the colors had decided that blue and purple should swap names. I was annoyed, because I liked blue when it was called purple and I liked purple when it was called blue. This one, now, probably confuses me the most, because I have no idea where the fuck I got the idea that blue was originally called purple and vice versa.
- I thought there were two number tens. That is, when you were counting, you'd come to the number ten twice, since it obviously existed twice. My rationale for this was that ten was obviously the hugest number there was. In nursery school, that's about as high as you count, and that's how many fingers you have, so it made sense to me. Ten was the difference between being a kid and being a grownup. When you were ten, you were a grownup, like my Dad. I also knew that my big brother was ten, and that he was clearly not a grownup. Therefore, I concluded that there was two tens, and I told this to my Dad (who responded by saying "okay"). I thought this was a dumb and confusing system.
So, what were some of your bizarre childhood misconceptions? And "I used to think there was a God LOL" doesn't count. Sorry, Cookiecutter.
That's awesome.
