Dark Tranquillity finishes shaving their balls

EvilVince

EvilVince

Satan Christ
Dec 16, 2001
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Morristown, Arizona
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Vocalist Mikael Stanne of the Swedish melodic death metallers DARK TRANQUILLITY has issued the following update:

"I can't believe it... We made it! It's done and there is nothing I can do about it. We have NO MORE pubic hair!

"Just got back from the barber where all pubes are now shipped off to Denmark where Tue Madsen will perform his magicky magic on the things we've been working on these last 7 weeks. I just finished shaving my balls a couple of days ago and it feels sweet.

"As always with shavings, there is alot of stress and self-doubt, but being in a more than familiar environment in Martin's [Henriksson, guitar] barber shop has helped tremendously. The shavings have not only been smooth and focused but the overall feeling that we are creating something amazing has really driven us through this. It turned out so different and diverse that the hardest thing for me now is to find a suitable title for the whole thing. How can I sum up in a title something that is everything and nothing, grounded and out there, intorvert and extra-terrestial all at the same time? I know, we're going to just call it "Shaving Our Balls".

"Welll, keep watching this space and I will let you know soon enough. I feel so clean and fresh down there!

"Right now I am just so glad it's done. Anders [Jivarp, drums] did a fantastic job shaving our balls in the barber shop, Micke [Michael Nicklasson] has delivered some really fine pubic hair, Martin and Niklas [Sundin, guitar] have really outdone themselves with scissors and shaving cream and Martin B [Brändström, electronics] has poured a lot of pubic hair into his endeavor. Now all we do is wait for the wigs, and this being our first time weaving out of house so to speak we are really excited to see what the hell we've been up to!"


-Vince
 
Haha.

Yeah, it's an interesting update. I look forward to hearing the wigs... or... whatever... soon too :). Especially as they're so enthusiastic about the whole thing.

The worse thing though...

And jesus god in heaven, I don't really want to even say it...

I hope Stanne didn't shave off his facial hair too! :(
 
lame/10.
 
As much as the homosexual innuendo of ball shaving excites me, I think I'll pass
reading that and just comment in a MMO way:

*Wall of text crits you for 471952*
*you die*
 
As for a title, it'll surprise me if they don't just name it after one of the tracks... I kind of expect that. I'll be glad if they don't though. I had a horrid feeling it was going to end up being called Blind at Heart. In my opinion insignificunt would be better.

@plinny... I'm well surprised and pleased DT have such a good reaction on blabbermouth. Most all that site semmes to be is youtube style shitty arguments over what opinions are *yawn*... luckily no idiot has offered "DT are boring" to the pot yet to trigger one off.
 
King Chaos said:
As for a title, it'll surprise me if they don't just name it after one of the tracks... I kind of expect that. I'll be glad if they don't though. I had a horrid feeling it was going to end up being called Blind at Heart. In my opinion insignificunt would be better.

@plinny... I'm well surprised and pleased DT have such a good reaction on blabbermouth. Most all that site semmes to be is youtube style shitty arguments over what opinions are *yawn*... luckily no idiot has offered "DT are boring" to the pot yet to trigger one off.
Click to expand...

You know, those who think dt is boring... I'd send them off right to Opeth :D

I had insignifiCunt in mind, but too many won't recognize the irony.
 
King Chaos said:
AI'll be glad if they don't though.
Click to expand...

In all likelihood the majority of long-time fans prefer variety, eclectic choices, original titles, and therefore agree with your opinion. It remains to be seen whether DT's choices reflect more the will of their historical fans or a generic, run-of-the-mill flavor for easier picks. While I'm not saying they're going to choose taking into consideration this aspect, the result is bound to mean something in terms of the kind of band they are at this point in time.
 
rahvin said:
In all likelihood the majority of long-time fans prefer variety, eclectic choices, original titles, and therefore agree with your opinion. It remains to be seen whether DT's choices reflect more the will of their historical fans or a generic, run-of-the-mill flavor for easier picks. While I'm not saying they're going to choose taking into consideration this aspect, the result is bound to mean something in terms of the kind of band they are at this point in time.
Click to expand...

I like albums which have title tracks that are really good, like Haven, Back to Times of Splendor or Annhilation of the Wicked. But sometimes it makes me think that the title track is named because it's the best song or whatever, and it doesn't really make sense when the song is underwhelming in comparison to the rest of the album (Damage Done, Come Clarity). But not just to satisfy us fans, I can imagine Stanne as an artist would rather conjour a name that sums up the entire vision than single out part of it...

I'm really looking forward to the artwork too. Sundin (I'm assuming he'll do it) out did himself with the whole character thing (and all the concept work circulating it).

I'm really hoping their influences haven't come full circle and they haven't paid too much attention to the american metal scene and sound (like with In Flames)... which at present, as far as I can tell, is a watered down version of sweden 11 years ago anyway. The Gallery + Destroy Erase Improve + Blink 182 (the water) = Atreyu etc...
 
King Chaos said:
I'm really looking forward to the artwork too. Sundin (I'm assuming he'll do it) out did himself with the whole character thing (and all the concept work circulating it).
Click to expand...

You can utilize your Paint skills on this one :heh:

I'm really hoping their influences haven't come full circle and they haven't paid too much attention to the american metal scene and sound (like with In Flames)... which at present, as far as I can tell, is a watered down version of sweden 11 years ago anyway. The Gallery + Destroy Erase Improve + Blink 182 (the water) = Atreyu etc...
Click to expand...

What are you talking about?

All this "american scene" is watered down degraded shite which didn't make past inner censor of scandinavian musicians. In the mid-90s. So the product of that abortion is US metalcore.

I'm filled with despise, but I have no idea what in-particular I'm speaking about. Hmmm.
 
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