Do you wipe your arse standing up or sitting down?

[Reign in Acai]

That's what I did. Do you think I'm so naive to use the same brown piece of 2ply back and forth to the point of self prostate examination?

I got a fistful of charmin, went from lower hemisphere to the upper on my arse, folded the paper, repeated, folded again and got the edges of the grime. I then bent over slightly and attempted to dig any chunklets that remained out of my perpetual virgin rectum. Behold, no stains. But Hark, something was adrift in my buttum. I sat on the bowl and to my chagrin, Shit stains were large and in charge!!


Cara, you have a dirty bum. There's no shame in it, just change your habits going forward. Prevention of UTIs can save lives!!!

 

[Tide In Mind Out]

It sounds like maybe you needed to shit some more

 

[Reign in Acai]

Cara, I want you to take pictures of the toilet paper after your next stool.

First, pictures of the toilet paper after a full complete wiping while standing. I then want you to take a picture of the toilet paper after wiping sitting down. I guarantee that there will be a russet smear on the fecal fabric.

 

[Tide In Mind Out]

We shall see.

 

[~Neurotica]

Aww, guys, you're so cute

 

[Reign in Acai]

How rare is Impaled's - Mondo Medicale? I see it going for $40 on egay, amazon, and half.com?

I went to sell this shit and make some cheddar? Chtulufagn, where the fark are ye?

 

[Conspicuously Absent]

I was half expecting jerry to ask for step for step pictures of you demonstrating... or video.

 

[Reign in Acai]

Nah, we have a cyber-sibling relationship, it would be quite awkward.

 

[Tide In Mind Out]

Not really, seeing as how I've actually seen one of your turds in person. While it was still fresh, too!

If I made a video or took detailed pictures, all that might be seen is a slight hint of buttCHEEK, poop, and toilet paper.

 

[Reign in Acai]

Not really, seeing as how I've actually seen one of your turds in person. While it was still fresh, too!

When was this my dear?

 

[Tide In Mind Out]

When was this my dear?

HC I. The Primordial Poo!

 

[Reign in Acai]

Was that at the hotel when I called you in to the bathroom to bask at my achievement? I don't remember splunking at the venue.

 

[Tide In Mind Out]

Yeah, hotel.

 

[Tide In Mind Out]

So I just shat, did my wiping standing up as usual, and then made an additional wipe while sitting.

Pictures are coming. Prepare to never visit this thread again, because I'm not smudging out the details

 

[Chromatose]

Weird, as I as pooping this morning I thought about how the only worthy course this thread could take next was to take pics of said wiping.

WHAT A COINCIDENCE

 

[Tide In Mind Out]

Last wipe done while standing. Clean!

Additional wipe done while sitting. Still clean!

Let's zoom in.

 

[Krilons Resa]

You've gotta be shitting me.

 

[Reign in Acai]

You've gotta be shitting me.

I do not believe it. Can you take pictures of your technique (fully clothed)?

Have Derick snap the shots.

 

[Climb Thar Hill]

let's not forget though. different craps may require more or less wiping. I know some craps are messy as all hell while others are neat...

we'll need more tests

 

[Tide In Mind Out]

this one was soft, and required a decent amount of wiping.

JUST ACCEPT IT. Wiping How-To tutorial at HC 3.