for the girls of this board: i've figured out the funnest game to play in the bathtub

[screwdriverqueen]

alright so post-period right?

i don't know about you, but i get this weird sort of post-period afterbirth stuff that comes out of my cooch on occasion.

so here's the game:

while taking a bath, i've learned how to actually SHOOT the post-period chunks out of my vag! i'd call them more veiny plasma balls, rather than chunks, really, because they seem to have a definite semi-solid form about them.

they're clear, and sometimes have dark brown or red veins running through them (on close inspectation.)

so once you eject these little fuckers (with a good amount of velocity) then this part is amazing:

THEY SWIM AROUND IN THE BATH WATER LIKE SEA MONKEYS, FISH, STINGRAYS, OR LIVING DINOSAURS! (TRIOPS.)

and then you frantically try to catch it in glee, and when you do.... you stick it on the lip of the bathtub. if you happen to experience the post-period afterbirth consecutively for days, then you can line them up all neatly on the edge of the bathtub and try to see if anyone notices.

sad part is, they DO evaporate at a pretty fast speed, so they end up looking like dirt or a little clump of hair.

anyway, i shit you not, try it, it's sort of fun.

 

[Pseudonym]

:zombie:

That was...
........................
............................
...................................
.......................................Brilliant.

p.s. I'm a dude

 

[screwdriverqueen]

yeah, see....

i was feeling a little bad about that. excluding all the guys from experiencing all this fun.

i'm currently thinking of an equivilent for males, but my mind keeps wandering towards motorized rubber rafts with remote controls up the ass. but this would be painful. so no.

 

[screwdriverqueen]

ps: this is how it is acheived:

what you do is build up the muscles in your vag, i guess?!

all i know is that you pretend you are drinking the ocean through your vadge, and then you sort of hurl it out. but not hurl as in vomit, it's more a powerful, graceful genital motion.

cept sometimes when the post-period afterbirth vagina balls come flying out, the water around that area gets uh, MURKY! for a second.

but just swish it around with your hand, the water clears right up in a matter of seconds. but don't spend too much time trying to clear the water of vagina flakes because then the "FISH" will lose it's velocity and stop swimming. and then there's no game at all.

 

[FuSoYa]

for a minute i comprehended that as meaning remote control rafts that would drive up your butt, and I was envisioning the propellor part of the outboard motor totally twisting or chopping rectum as it made its way up.

Well, when guys sit in the tub, it's fun to experiment with peen buoyancy. We've got that at least.

 

[Lunatic_Fringe]

dammit... I WANT A VAGINA!!!!!

 

[Pseudonym]

Your Vag should be like, set in a plaster cast, and put in the Vag hall of fame for all to bow and worship. A true pioneer! Lol, I have NEVER heard of any of this before, and it's blowing my mind.

 

[screwdriverqueen]

if i had a floating peen, i'd flick it a bunch of times and watch it bobble up and down in the water.

you are lucky, because you can do this any time of the month that you desire.

i need to wait specifically for those veiny vaginal plasma ball times of month. :/

 

[BigFakeSmile]

during your period, going to the bathroom is like modern art. those neat crimson amoeboids...

 

[FuSoYa]

OK OK wait a second I have to interrupt you LURKERS and say that it is UNACCEPTABLE for you to post only when screwdriverqueen posts about her vag!!!

 

[screwdriverqueen]

bigfakesmile.....

HAHA YES!

and sometimes when you pull the tampon out and drop it into the toilet, you hear a PLOP right after the tampon itself PLOPS in the toilet, and then you realize that yup, it's one of those bloody vag chunks.

 

[Pseudonym]

I equate this thread with a gruesome car crash, when you pass by it you really don't want to look, but curiosity keeps you from not looking, and you just stare at the mangled bodies. In this case its bloody menstral Vag talk!

 

[BigFakeSmile]

and how about those times when you actually feel the second your period starts? feels like letting go, or a warm waterfall from inside you.

 

[screwdriverqueen]

Originally posted by FuSoYa
OK OK wait a second I have to interrupt you LURKERS and say that it is UNACCEPTABLE for you to post only when screwdriverqueen posts about her vag!!!

oh, don't get upset.

my post-period plama chunk-covered vag just brings out the best in everyone.

 

[screwdriverqueen]

Originally posted by BigFakeSmile
and how about those times when you actually feel the second your period starts? feels like letting go, or a warm waterfall from inside you.

hmm. well mine don't actually ERUPT in streams and streams of blood/uterine lining from my cooch. (waterfall)

it

drips?

no velocity. that's why the post-period vagina balls are so fun. EJECTING!

 

[FuSoYa]

percolates.

I imagine that a period globule ejection would sound like the background noise in Tourian!

 

[FrostGiant]

I was going to post something, then I realized that I really don't know how to respond to any part of this thread.

 

[BigFakeSmile]

jeez i was away from the computer for a few minutes but im back. i should clarify. its not a literal eruption -- its a waterfall sensation, but then theres not really anything much there.

 

[Fidel Castrato]

will someone plz mod this???

 

[avi]

Originally posted by FrostGiant
I was going to post something, then I realized that I really don't know how to respond to any part of this thread.

I'm with you. :zombie: