I was thinking about this last night. Why are our friends are friends? How do they become our friends? I think that a friendship starts because in its beginning a friendship offers benefits, which can be positive or negative, social or personal, whatever; I think this information can show one who their real friends are. Ive noticed that when the benefits of a friendship are gone, most deteriorate, except the ones that have real meaning. If this is the case then I would wager that most people have few real friends. To me, a friendship shouldnt be based on solely on benefits. Think of the benefits that come from your friendships, remove them, would that person still remain your friend. The only thing needed in a true friendship is the benefit of that friendship (for lack of a better phrase). I think it is something natural, I think a true friend is someone you can talk about nothing with for hours. What do you think?
"Friend" or Friend
- Thread starter S4R
- Start date
Belial
Rainbow Demon
I have no friends. I refer to some people as friends, because They've been friends of the family since I was a little kid and I lack a better word to describe my relationship with them. I don't actually consider them friends.
To me, a friend is someone you can get along with. Who accepts you as the person you are, and you enjoy being around. The friendship shouldn't be based on "benefits" but it should be benefitial in the sense that your life would be less interesting if that person wasn't in it.
To me, a friend is someone you can get along with. Who accepts you as the person you are, and you enjoy being around. The friendship shouldn't be based on "benefits" but it should be benefitial in the sense that your life would be less interesting if that person wasn't in it.
i try not to distinguish between real friends and just friends... that's why i don't consider all to many persons being friend. most of them will go through fire for me as i would do for them. that's what true friends are for. i don' t need the rest. we understand each other without words.
Lakestream
Member
I don't have that many that I consider being REAL friends, but I've got quite a bunch of people I refer to as friends...there's a bit of a difference
Belial
Rainbow Demon
mindflesh
Rainbow Satan Overflow
Nobody I know - except for my family members - would "go through fire" for me... most wouldn't even go near the fire...
Belial
Rainbow Demon
Magisterial
Night-Shadow
I too have three true friends and lots of... aquantences, although sometimes its hard to be sure. One of my friends i have known since the day she was born and i would do anything for her. She's in England at the moment and upon hearing of some very pleasing results of my study recently she rang me. She was moved to tears. She's someone i know will always be there.
Misanthrope
Latin, NOT Mexican.
I base friendship on trust and i trust no one at this point. Just 2 people that are close to me so that about tells it.
Belial
Rainbow Demon
Misanthrope
Latin, NOT Mexican.
let me think.........my REAL friends, I define as people that I can talk to about personal stuff. Trust them with stuff like that. I've got two of those. The rest of the people are just people I hang out with whenever they're around. I also define real friends as people that you hang out with, say, outside of school. You call them regularly and such.
Lina
kickass elizabethan style
I went through a mini-crisis about a year ago when I worried that my best friend and I were growing apart because we didn't giggle for hours over private jokes anymore and because I didn't feel like I could talk to her about the things that excite me the most -- music, politics, etc. But then I realized that it's just a part of growing older. There's definitely a honeymoon period for friendships -- just because that fades doesn't mean I should "divorce" them. Our friendship is fine now because we just don't expect as much out of each other. She still knows me better than anyone, so it would be a waste to dump that.
But one thing that depresses me is that it seems you have to make your good friends early in life -- before they find someone else to fill that role. For instance, I had lots of acquaintances in my classes at college, but there's not a single person that I met in college that I ever hung out with outside of class. My three friends are the people I met during my senior year of high school (huge school, so we didn't know each other before then). I never branched out because I was too comfortable with my routine of hanging with my high school friends -- even though I could feel us diverging. I regret that, but I also don't know what I could have done differently, because (1) I didn't live on campus, (2) I didn't go to random parties, and (3) everyone gets on my nerves.
And to be honest, I would never pick my current friends now. They believe in God, they're ignorant about current events, they listen to crappy music, etc. The ONLY thing tying us together is our past.
At any rate, I'm glad I have the few close friends that I do -- apparently, some of you are more lonely than me. I should count my blessings.
But one thing that depresses me is that it seems you have to make your good friends early in life -- before they find someone else to fill that role. For instance, I had lots of acquaintances in my classes at college, but there's not a single person that I met in college that I ever hung out with outside of class. My three friends are the people I met during my senior year of high school (huge school, so we didn't know each other before then). I never branched out because I was too comfortable with my routine of hanging with my high school friends -- even though I could feel us diverging. I regret that, but I also don't know what I could have done differently, because (1) I didn't live on campus, (2) I didn't go to random parties, and (3) everyone gets on my nerves.
And to be honest, I would never pick my current friends now. They believe in God, they're ignorant about current events, they listen to crappy music, etc. The ONLY thing tying us together is our past.
At any rate, I'm glad I have the few close friends that I do -- apparently, some of you are more lonely than me. I should count my blessings.
City_of_da_Moon
All hail the tardo
City_of_da_Moon
All hail the tardo
MetalManCPA
Papa Opeth
Other than family - I have only 2 people in my life I call friends. I don't waste my time looking for friends, and I have no interest in friendship outside of what I already have.
I have a great family - right through the great-grandmother. Any time open (which isn't much) my family likes to spend with the rest of the family, not seperated with so-called friends. My kids are the same way - they have acquantances in school, not "real" friends that can be trusted.
I am sitting here, though, waiting for my son (freshman in college) to bring forth his 1st girlfriend. I actually look forward to these perceived milestones in life. Everybody asked me, or just believed I would be real sentimental and sad sending my firstborn off to college. Actually, I thought it was cool. Hey - why should I sadden myself over the inevitable? I just plain enjoyed the moment.
I have a great family - right through the great-grandmother. Any time open (which isn't much) my family likes to spend with the rest of the family, not seperated with so-called friends. My kids are the same way - they have acquantances in school, not "real" friends that can be trusted.
I am sitting here, though, waiting for my son (freshman in college) to bring forth his 1st girlfriend. I actually look forward to these perceived milestones in life. Everybody asked me, or just believed I would be real sentimental and sad sending my firstborn off to college. Actually, I thought it was cool. Hey - why should I sadden myself over the inevitable? I just plain enjoyed the moment.
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