I sold a book to some anal retentive freak on ebay who freaked out because the pre-filled information provided by the publisher had the DIMENSIONS of the book listed incorrectly. He sends me this.
"The book you shipped to me was not to the dimensions described in your add (sic)that I bid & paid for. What can you do to make it right, not willing to pay my own return shipping for your misleading add (sic), waiting on reply."
Here's the reply he waited for.
You've totally foiled my evil plan to extort the extra money I get by misrepresenting the dimensions of a book. I am almost relieved, after 8 years as a respected member of the ebay community I thought they'd never catch me, I spent years on the run, always waiting for the shoe to drop on the facade my life had become. Now I can stop pretending, hiding and putting on this damn mask that hides my shame. What an evil misleading monster I am! I imagine your frustration as you carefully measured each side to verify that, indeed, this book is unreadable and completely useless. By plugging in an ISBN number a description is automatically filled in, making my nefarious deception so effortless, I laughed in the middle of the night thinking of the million of dollars I can bilk from ebayers everywhere by sending them books that are smaller (or larger)than it said they were. Ha HA Sir! I mock you, sir. I totally got $1.99 out of you. And then to tidy up my evil, evil plan(and this is where my true GENIUS shines),I charged you THREE dollars for shipping,knowing that the post office would charge me FIVE dollars and THIRTY FIVE cents to ship it! When you were painstakingly measuring the dimensions of the book, did you happen to notice the postage sticker on the package that said $5.35? (perhaps I should try farming or become a member of congress). By my calculations, in conning you in such a perfect way, I managed to net -$.36 That's MINUS THIRTY SIX CENTS
MY GOD MAN, how do I live with myself? HAHAHA, you got PWND SIR! PWND! I'd love to expound more on this but I have to go find more books to measure thoroughly so I can be sure the pre-filled information provided by each ISBN number is incorrect. And also I need my "me time", where I smoke cigars and roll around in my piles of negative capital in a wife-beater and silk underwear like Demi Moore in that one movie. I'm sorry for the catastrophe your life has become, but it's a cruel world and I need to make my way through it minus thirty six cents at a time.
"The book you shipped to me was not to the dimensions described in your add (sic)that I bid & paid for. What can you do to make it right, not willing to pay my own return shipping for your misleading add (sic), waiting on reply."
Here's the reply he waited for.
You've totally foiled my evil plan to extort the extra money I get by misrepresenting the dimensions of a book. I am almost relieved, after 8 years as a respected member of the ebay community I thought they'd never catch me, I spent years on the run, always waiting for the shoe to drop on the facade my life had become. Now I can stop pretending, hiding and putting on this damn mask that hides my shame. What an evil misleading monster I am! I imagine your frustration as you carefully measured each side to verify that, indeed, this book is unreadable and completely useless. By plugging in an ISBN number a description is automatically filled in, making my nefarious deception so effortless, I laughed in the middle of the night thinking of the million of dollars I can bilk from ebayers everywhere by sending them books that are smaller (or larger)than it said they were. Ha HA Sir! I mock you, sir. I totally got $1.99 out of you. And then to tidy up my evil, evil plan(and this is where my true GENIUS shines),I charged you THREE dollars for shipping,knowing that the post office would charge me FIVE dollars and THIRTY FIVE cents to ship it! When you were painstakingly measuring the dimensions of the book, did you happen to notice the postage sticker on the package that said $5.35? (perhaps I should try farming or become a member of congress). By my calculations, in conning you in such a perfect way, I managed to net -$.36 That's MINUS THIRTY SIX CENTS
MY GOD MAN, how do I live with myself? HAHAHA, you got PWND SIR! PWND! I'd love to expound more on this but I have to go find more books to measure thoroughly so I can be sure the pre-filled information provided by each ISBN number is incorrect. And also I need my "me time", where I smoke cigars and roll around in my piles of negative capital in a wife-beater and silk underwear like Demi Moore in that one movie. I'm sorry for the catastrophe your life has become, but it's a cruel world and I need to make my way through it minus thirty six cents at a time.
Hats off to ya!
he should give you a positive feedback based on the reply alone.
