How do I convince my boyfriend death metal is not mood music?

[Shpongled]

My boyfriend is absolutely not a sadistic sex killer. He is a kind and generally considerate person. But he loves listening to gruesome death metal—music best described as blasting noise with deranged growls and shrieks that often (from what I can tell) celebrates horrendous misogynistic violence. He respects that I am not a fan of this music and doesn't usually play it when I am around. But he gets a huge charge from listening to it when we have sex and is comparatively lackluster at the deed when he doesn't have it to fire him up. Although I find the music unpleasant and distracting, I don't object when I feel focused enough to block it out. What really bothers me are the awful themes. It disturbs me that a seemingly well-adjusted man in his 30s is aroused by torture fantasies set to music. He says it's just about the "energy" for him, but I really don't know what to think about someone who wants to listen to Cannibal Corpse when he makes love to me. Am I being oversensitive about this?

 

[Will Bozarth]

what a cunt

 

[Morganna]

She obviously doesn't have too much to worry about in her life, if his music bothers her this much.

 

[Dead Winter]

That's what you get for being a metalhead and dating empty-headed cunts.

Stick ta yer own kind!!!!

 

[EricT]

You forgot the answer!


Dear Blasted,
It's always a comfort to know the person you love is not a sadistic sex killer—so right there you have something to build on. I like the image of you two making love: He's cranking up Cannibal Corpse's romantic classic "Bloody Chunks" while you're sticking in the ear buds of your iPod and desperately turning up the volume on Michael Bublé's version of "I've Got You Under My Skin." When you're not having sex, you say he's "generally considerate," which is not exactly a declaration that "I've got you under my skin/ I've got you deep in the heart of me/ So deep in my heart, that you're really a part of me." But couples need to have sex, and he finds it hard to perform unless you are forced to listen to songs of female dismemberment. As you describe it, you get through these sessions by trying to disassociate yourself from what is going on. This does not sound like a formula for sustained intimacy. I don't think you're being oversensitive about the gruesome nature of your boyfriend's favorite erotic imagery, especially since you are supposed to endure it. I have a hard time seeing where this relationship is headed—it already sounds like a Cannibal Corpse.

 

[Dead Winter]

*smacks forehead*

 

[WhiteBeastofWotan]

Reminds me of the douches that bring their nonmetal bimbos to shows. They always look miserable. Or they look like they're trying to fit into the bad metal crowd.
Leave the bitches at home guys.

 

[Anvil]

Reminds me of the douches that bring their nonmetal bimbos to shows. They always look miserable. Or they look like they're trying to fit into the bad metal crowd.
Leave the bitches at home guys.

I made that mistake once. Her fault for wanting to do things I liked to do.

 

[Tide In Mind Out]

Haha I just read that on MSN.

 

[Undefined]

*smacks forehead*

It's called a facepalm, say it right!

 

[Brooks]

It's called a facepalm, say it right!

Fuck yer internet.

 

[WhiteBeastofWotan]

Erroneous, a facepalm is over the face as follows:

Whereas he was doing the time honored forehead slap:

 

[neal]

is it cause he didnt mention the romantic tracks like 'fucked with a knife' ' i cum blood' 'entrails ripped from a virgin's cunt' 'stripped raped and strangled' 'pounded into dust' etc? more love to be found on those classic gems.

 

[dreaming neon darkspot]

ahahahah @ this thread

 

[Twelveby5]

From Skin To Liquid, now that's a FFest song.

but seriously, have you tried telling him, no boom boom if DM is on? Try it. When you're in the middle of 'love making' stop abruptly.... tell him his George is not exactly grinding your fancy.... i dont know.... like everybody else i took my ex to a metal concert once, was the worst gig i've ever been to. She wanted Pepsi, then she wanted to pee, then she wanted a sandwich.... I could've killed her that day, instead i broke up a month later

 

[Cat5Messiah]

Ha!

I read that at work today. I wanted to bust out some Deicide or Necrophagist right then and there.

 

[flying_whale]

I don't need Viagra.




































do you?

 

[azal]

this guy sounds like a faggot too for needing a certain music in order to be able to give it to her good.

sounds like a pretty good couple if you ask me.

 

[derek]

^^^.

 

[stefan86]

Reminds me of the douches that bring their nonmetal bimbos to shows. They always look miserable. Or they look like they're trying to fit into the bad metal crowd.
Leave the bitches at home guys.

haha, yeah' cause metal chicks are SOOOOOOOOO fun right?