i just don't get wiccans at all. seriously. what the hell?
- Thread starter minxnim
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VangelicSurgeon
Three Star General
VangelicSurgeon
Three Star General
VangelicSurgeon
Three Star General
VangelicSurgeon
Three Star General
note - this totally wasn't supposed to be 'rag on the fatties' thread, but after viewing several thousand-odd photos of wiccans, it just seems to keep happening. I can't explain it!
the beaching one is the besssttt.
okay, this poem is from the wicked wiccan wit website:
(please note the name of the author, PLZ)
The Eve of Midwinter
by Aurora Borealis Medicine Turkey
'Twas the eve of midwinter, and all through the coven
The witches were cookin strange things in the oven.
There were mugwort frittitas, and dragon's blood stew
And mescaline eggnog and mandrake fondue.
There were hot mountain oysters and road-kill pate
And spotted owl kidneys, and wombat flambe.
The circle was cast and the herbs had been smoked
In the hopes that the Goddess would soon be invoked.
When out of the hot tub arose such a clatter
I jumped on my broom to see what twas the matter.
And what should I see in the blackberry thorns
But a soaking wet Goddess and eight unicorn!
"I was just sitting down with my vibrating phallus
And a good book," she muttered "You bitches are callous.
I came when you called, over all my objections,
And got lost in the woods- you give lousy directions.
You turkeys invoked me, now look at my dress
My period's late and I got PMS."
She cursed and she muttered, she looked like a wreck
The unicorns whimpered and sat on the deck.
We gave her some weed and got her some grub
We brought her clean towels and she soaked in the tub.
Then she rose, hot and dripping, and gave us her blessing,
And jumped in her chariot, without even dressing!
"On Isis, on Eris, Oya and Astarte!
On Ishtar, Inanna! Kali and Hecate!"
We heard her exclaim as she climbed through the air
"Thank Goddess there's only eight sabbats a year!"
okay, this poem is from the wicked wiccan wit website:
(please note the name of the author, PLZ)
The Eve of Midwinter
by Aurora Borealis Medicine Turkey
'Twas the eve of midwinter, and all through the coven
The witches were cookin strange things in the oven.
There were mugwort frittitas, and dragon's blood stew
And mescaline eggnog and mandrake fondue.
There were hot mountain oysters and road-kill pate
And spotted owl kidneys, and wombat flambe.
The circle was cast and the herbs had been smoked
In the hopes that the Goddess would soon be invoked.
When out of the hot tub arose such a clatter
I jumped on my broom to see what twas the matter.
And what should I see in the blackberry thorns
But a soaking wet Goddess and eight unicorn!
"I was just sitting down with my vibrating phallus
And a good book," she muttered "You bitches are callous.
I came when you called, over all my objections,
And got lost in the woods- you give lousy directions.
You turkeys invoked me, now look at my dress
My period's late and I got PMS."
She cursed and she muttered, she looked like a wreck
The unicorns whimpered and sat on the deck.
We gave her some weed and got her some grub
We brought her clean towels and she soaked in the tub.
Then she rose, hot and dripping, and gave us her blessing,
And jumped in her chariot, without even dressing!
"On Isis, on Eris, Oya and Astarte!
On Ishtar, Inanna! Kali and Hecate!"
We heard her exclaim as she climbed through the air
"Thank Goddess there's only eight sabbats a year!"
avi
W3RK3R
xfer
I JERK OFF TO ARCTOPUS
one of my college roommates became a Discordian upon graduation. i guess that's one of the cooler neopaganisms, but they still have a lot of awfully lame goddess shit.
principiadiscordia.com
is her rendition of the discordian Bible.
principiadiscordia.com
is her rendition of the discordian Bible.
Dear mom and dad.
I am just writing you this note to say THANK YOU for not raising me as a weak minded gullible individual who falls prey easily to cults. Otherwise I could have ended up fancying myself a priestess and wearing a horrid pink satid dress, stuffing myself senseless with witch food.
Xoxo
amanda
VangelicSurgeon
Three Star General
chupe666
You may enter up to 25 ch
chupe666
You may enter up to 25 ch
chupe666
You may enter up to 25 ch
Ok, story time.
My stepmom's sister is a crazy wiccan woman. Her husband is a high priest of something or other. She makes soap, and her daughter's name is Tabitha.
AND I'M NOT LYING.
Each Christmas we see her, we get soap. Like that rough kind with all the oats and stuff in it. At first, we got it like 10 yrs ago, before I saw those kinds of soaps at those Body Shop type stores, and I thought it was some freakish crap soap that would turn me into a Thespian or something.
And incidentally, 80% of these pictures of wiccan women match her description: 250lbs, glasses, long brown hair wearing something with fringes.
My stepmom's sister is a crazy wiccan woman. Her husband is a high priest of something or other. She makes soap, and her daughter's name is Tabitha.
AND I'M NOT LYING.
Each Christmas we see her, we get soap. Like that rough kind with all the oats and stuff in it. At first, we got it like 10 yrs ago, before I saw those kinds of soaps at those Body Shop type stores, and I thought it was some freakish crap soap that would turn me into a Thespian or something.
And incidentally, 80% of these pictures of wiccan women match her description: 250lbs, glasses, long brown hair wearing something with fringes.
chupe666
You may enter up to 25 ch
Hey, y'all! Don't forget Southeastern Massachusetts Pagan Pride Day!
Should be coming up in September.
http://www.semappd.com/
(scary side note: at bottom of webpage, "Web Design donated by Burnley Allen Wilkins" appears.
WITCHES HAVE TAKEN OVER MY SURNAME!! ACK!!! TOTALLY HAUNTED!!!)
Should be coming up in September.
http://www.semappd.com/
(scary side note: at bottom of webpage, "Web Design donated by Burnley Allen Wilkins" appears.
WITCHES HAVE TAKEN OVER MY SURNAME!! ACK!!! TOTALLY HAUNTED!!!)
BigFakeSmile
toe much love!
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