ITT, we tell strip club stories to make Jerry feel better

[Reign in Acai]

That's sweet!

Have you ever been to a bachelor party with two strippers willing to do lesbian shit . . . in a barn about 25 miles from anywhere civilized . . . with no security for the strippers . . . and LOTS of drunk hicks/rednecks?

Let's just say I started feeling sorry for the girls . . . until they proceeded to physically abuse the bachelor (i.e. extreme S&M tactics).

I'm only reminded of this because one of the strippers shoved a loli pop in her pussy . . . and then tried to get it in her ass. It was either too sticky or too big for the ass, though.

And yes . . . the bachelor sucked on it after that.

That's how we roll in Kansas.

Yea bachelor parties slay. Licked the nipples off of this bints chest at my buds bachelor party.

The lesbian shit afterwards was pretty weak. 400 bucks for just a little double sided dildo action. I want to see some fucking carpet munching for that price damnit!

Oh and Mark, after a couple hours of thinking, I'm over it brutha. 500 bucks isnt much money for some quality nipplage in your mouth, and a handful of Knudsen low fat cottage cheese ass Hail to sweet Titties!

 

[Nate The Great]

This is the part where the Swedish fellows get all frightened by the talk of tits and ass, and then they tell us how ugly women are and how they'd rather ramble on about some random lyrics.

 

[Reign in Acai]

This is the part where the Swedish fellows get all frightened by the talk of tits and ass, and then they tell us how ugly women are and how they'd rather ramble on about some random lyrics.

Yea big titties are not "tr00".

 

[NAD]

This is the part where the Swedish fellows get all frightened by the talk of tits and ass, and then they tell us how ugly women are and how they'd rather ramble on about some random lyrics.

hahahaha

Yeah there's starting to become a real two party system here, those who like drugs and boobs, and those who suck at life. Politics has nothing do with it.

 

[Reign in Acai]

hahahaha

Yeah there's starting to become a real two party system here, those who like drugs and boobs, and those who suck at life. Politics has nothing do with it.

I only like boobs. I'm a "moderate". :Smug:

 

[NAD]

hahaha awesome.

 

[NAD]

I'm a firm believer in the philosophy of a ruling class, especially since I rule.

 

[Erik]

 

[JayKeeley]

Even better, she wanted to have sex again so badly, she woke my roommate up and HE CLIMBED INTO MY BED AND FUCKED HER RIGHT NEXT TO ME WHILE I WAS PASSED OUT!

I don't even know what to say here.... I'm laughing so hard.

OK I mean, why didn't he just do her in his own bed???

This reminds me of Harold and Kumar go to White Castle and that scene where the car mechanic's HOT wife asks them both to fuck her at the same time, "one in the front and one in the back"....and then they start questioning whether they should do it just because their balls will be rubbing up against each other. Haha, men can debate over anything.

 

[MFJ]

SHOTGUN ANUS

 

[Erik]

This reminds me of Harold and Kumar go to White Castle and that scene where the car mechanic's HOT wife asks them both to fuck her at the same time, "one in the front and one in the back"....and then they start questioning whether they should do it just because their balls will be rubbing up against each other. Haha, men can debate over anything.

ugh i sure fucken wouldnt

 

[NAD]

Yeah if I ever tag team a bint with some other dude, it'll have to be one getting skull and the other plowing down south.

And even then I doubt I could do it, seeing and hearing some other sweaty naked scoring within 3 feet of me isn't my idea of fun. I mean I watched myself in a mirror once and nearly lost my boner. She dug it though, whatever.

 

[lurch70]

yeah, my dick is the ONLY star of the show in my fantasies

 

[JayKeeley]

I love watching it in the mirror! (Chicks love it btw).

Yeah, I couldn't do it with some chick and another dude involved in her action ever, unless of course it was my own clone. Even then it would be icky. I'd be like, "dude, you need to workout".

 

[NAD]

"dude, you need to workout".

haha, it's like Mel Brooks in Spaceballs: WHY DIDN'T ANYONE TELL ME MY ASS WAS SO BIG!??!

x09824082

 

[JayKeeley]

haha, it's like Mel Brooks in Spaceballs: WHY DIDN'T ANYONE TELL ME MY ASS WAS SO BIG!??!

x09824082

Hahaha, yeah when he comes through the transporter with his head on back to front.

By the way, HIGH ANXIETY is on TV tonight!! Actually it's on now -- public network.

 

[MadeInNewJersey]

hahahaha

Yeah there's starting to become a real two party system here, those who like drugs and boobs, and those who suck at life. Politics has nothing do with it.

hmmmm

dunno where I fit then, since I quit drugs

 

[MadeInNewJersey]

@ JayK

btw, I would totally have a 3some with a chick and some other dude, provided a) said dude was a friend of mine, and b) there were clear-as-day rules of engagement, i.e. no man-on-man groping

The chick would LOVE it, that'd be hot.

 

[Erik]

a) said dude was a friend of mine

isn't that

even worse

 

[MadeInNewJersey]

No, at least I would trust him.