Need Some Feedback

Soul Forlorn

May 15, 2001
Illinois, USA
Hello everyone. I have a new song on called "A Bird In a Robe of Black". Also, I have another song called "Away With The Breeze" that has been on for maybe a month now. I'm wondering if any of you would be so kind as to listen to these songs, or any other of my songs for that matter, and give me some feedback. Also, for those of you already familiar with my material could you let me know what you like the best and least in my songs. I post this not to get high on the charts but to get an idea of what musical direction I should concentrate on. I would really appreciate it and I'd just like to say you guys are great. This forum rules!

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Yea man, some seriously cool shit! Great vocals too, you seriously got to do something with this man, I like your stuff way way more than about 99.96% of the "signed" acts that I've heard, it makes me think there's got to be a market for the music you are producing and you owe to the world to share on a larger scale! (ie. get a record deal). It's a shame you live so far away cuz I'd love to do some kinda insane prog rock/groove collaboration with you and a kick-ass bassist (I'm a jazzy/fusion drummer as you know) cuz i can tell your ideas and style aren't just limited to death metal. Sorry I don't have specific examples of what I like, when I get more free time (soon) I'll listen to your offerings more and I'll totally analyse it to death and let you know. The things that stand out for me are the vocals, the epic and inspired song structures, the depressing atmospheric energy, and the titles of the tunes. The playing is very slick and polished as well, a must for the retentive types like me, hehe. Listening to your shit, the cliche "don't quit your day job" never came to mind.. and you know me, I hate everything! :) heheh

you rule!

I downloaded "Away With The Breeze" and I thought it was very good. Good guitar riifs, good drum fills, and, the vocals are great :D I was wondering if your drummer uses an electronic drum set, cause there was something it that sounded really clean, and ... well, electronic. That's not a bad thing at all, just curious :heh:
Anyways, good luck, and hope to hear some more from the band.
Thanks guys! I really appreciate the feedback and hope to get some more.

I was wondering if your drummer uses an electronic drum set, cause there was something it that sounded really clean, and ... well, electronic. That's not a bad thing at all, just curious
by Defected

Actually Soul Forlorn is a one-man band. I do everything myself, not because I'm stuck up or anything(I'd love to do a collaboration with someone), it's just I don't know anyone around the area in which I live who would be interested. The drums are electronic, not by an electronic drum set though. The sounds are produced by a combination of a synth and drum machine and are completely programmed by me on my computer via midi.

Listening to your shit, the cliche "don't quit your day job" never came to mind.. and you know me, I hate everything! heheh
by Satori

That's no shit Satori, you do hate everything which is why your opinion really means a lot. Thanks

the death vocalist in your band is scaring the shit out of me!!
by Xtokalon

Thanks man, I've never really considered myself much of a vocalist but after hearing several good comments about the vocals it inspired me to keep creating more songs with vocals

btw, your logo and the picture on the mp3 site with the moon in the background and the silloueette of wheat in the foreground are awesome too. Peace
by Xtokalon

That's actually kinda funny. That picture was never meant to be represented that small. Those are actually just scrawny trees in winter on top of a ridge during twilight(that's actually the sun, not the moon)
I'm at work now with all kind of hassle around me so I can't concentrate in analyzing the music now, so I'll do the commentary later. I just wanted to say that your vocals sound, like said, scary. :) They could be a bit "brighter" at some points, though.
I just wanted to say that Xtokalon analysis was very good and I think he communicated the ideas very well. Soul, if are able to do what he describes, it would be fucking amazing! Going in more exteme directions with more "overplaying" and clashing would be so cool. It's got to be hard cuz it's just you alone so you don't have the benefit of the styles and ideas of others which give that rich and erratic multi-layred sound.

If you had a CD I would totally buy it! Good luck man

Thank you Xtokalon for your analysis. It's really the first constructive criticism I've gotten, and is very much appreciated. I think I know what you mean about being more "multi-layered" and more "competition with the instruments and melodies." Opeth is one of the few bands that does that effectively. Could you possibly give some examples of what you are describing. I'm definitely not disagreeing with you concerning my music, it's just that as I look back most of my songs are very multilayered. There are some parts that have four guitars doing different things all at once, not to mention synths, bass, and drums along with the guitar. I'm just trying to get an idea of what I could do differently in the future. I will say that on the song I'm working on now I'm working on having more variety in the song, more parts, more solos, and more variety in the drum lines and bass parts. Vocals are completely new for me, but I'm working on my voice, trying get more variety out of it. Not so much on "Her hands...", but on "Away..." and "A Bird..." they are somewhat monotone with little variety in terms of emotion. That was completely intentional on "Away...". On that song I was trying to create the most gloomy, dark feel that I could. As far as for my music being gloomy, I'm glad you think so! That is purely my intention, though I plan on putting more anger, despair, and pure evil into future work. Intentional overplaying is difficult in the environment in which I record. I'm not in a professional studio so sometimes having too much ends up sounding too muddy and the emotions in the song that I try to get across end up getting lost in the mix. And yes Satori, I'm definitely at a disadvantage concerning being by myself. Being with others who have slight differences in style but share an overall same way of musical thought is truly a magical thing. Again, thanks for the feedback and Xtokalon I'd love to hear you expand your thoughts a bit, possibly with some examples.
Ah, Xtokalon, now I know what you're talking about. It's something everyone who records in a home studio environment battles-production quality. I'm in no way even close to being a professional sound engineer and I can't afford thousands of dollars of equipment. Ironically though, just the other day I was pondering this aspect of my music and on the song I'm currently working on hopefully there will be a few minor changes for the better. I'm experimenting with some reverb and delay effects as well as doing more with panning and expanding and I'm pleased with the results. I feel the quality of the production on my previous work is fairly decent, especially for home studio recordings, probably decent enough that the average listener would find it at least listenable. I'm hoping others feel the same way. Damn, I guess I just need to quit kicking myself in the head and just realize my stuff will never have the production quality of the mighty Opeth. Anyway, I can't thank you enough for the critique. It really means a lot to me. Hopefully on my next song you'll hear changes for the better. Shit, now I just need to figure out how I can become more E V I L!:lol: