Quite Possibly The Most Off-Topic Topic in UM OS history....

Wicked Child

Wicked Child

DYNO-MITE!
Mar 4, 2003
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Vista, CA
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Since I trust the judgement and opinions of most of you here, I thought i'd run this by you.

I'm 19 years old. And in my 19 years, i have lived the most unlucky love life you could possibly have at my age, without anyone getting hurt physically.This has made me, in a way, afraid of crushes. It never goes my way, I always get hurt, so i ignore them. I never know how to approach a girl, either, never really did, so that just makes things worse.

And that brings me to my new problem. I take the public bus to and from school every day. The good ol' 320. A couple weeks ago, I met this girl on that very bus. It was a thursday evening, about 5:30pm, pacific time. I got out of my Political Science class early that day, so i took the 5:10pm 320. And around 5:30, the bus stops at the Vista Transit Center. Anyway, she gets on, and my IMMEDIATELY pay attention. It was weird, my eyes literally took control of the rest of my body and forced me to look at her.

Unfortunately, the bus ride was too short to really start up any meaningful conversation. A word or two, but that's probably it. This past Thursday, i get out of Political Science early again, so i take the early 320 bus...again. We get to Vista and she gets on. This time, the bus is packed full, so she sits in the front, i'm in the back.

So, we've talked, but it was small talk, bu something about her pulls me to her. I have no idea what, but i just feel pulled to her. She has a "responsible" aura about her. The way she presents herself, the way she talks, and believe me, that is a turn on. She has a good girl look to her which is another turn on, and not to mention that she's really pretty, overall. And i swear, I SWEAR i've caught her looking at me!

She works at the mall at the Pat & Oscar's restraunt. I live LITERALLY across the street from the mall. I want to talk to her, i want to see her.But since i barely know her(i don't even know her name!), i don't know how to approach her.

This might be a petty thing, but there's only one way to find out. I know, not an easy scenario, but any ideas?
 
Bro, sounds like you're looking for a commitment, this sounds like it could lead to something. You can talk to her & like you said, you caught her looking at you. She's interested, no doubt. Take things slow like, you don't wanna freak her out.
Try asking her if she'd like to get together for something to eat. Like guys gals eat too, though maybe not as much. It's a perfect time to get to know her better & in a public place, which won't scare her away...
I wish you luck in your persuit of happiness...
SIXXSWINE-\m/
 
I'd say you're pretty lucky man. There's never been a girl in my life who's so immediately caught my notice as what you describe. My best advice is that you be yourself and go talk to her, as soon as possible.
 
I can't give any specific advice. Being there, pass through that, and 18 years later still don't know a proper recipe.

The best advice is BE YOURSELF. Take the dive and do your best, if it works congratulations, if not you'll learn something for the next time. The worst battle is the one that was never fought ;)
 
Wicked Child, I gotta say that everyone here has offered up some great advice. I think you should take it all. Now here's 2 cents from your favorite uncle Ted:

First - you GOTTA talk to her. Do not miss this opportunity. But like the Swine said, it's all in how you go about it. BE HONEST. Just start with a hello and a smile and tell her that you happen to see her all the time and just thought it would be great if you could get to know her. (something along those lines...just play it cool and HONEST.) Don't be too shy - women love confidence - but don't be obnoxious either. Just let her know that you keep seeing her around and think it'd be great to get to know her. that's about it.
REMEMBER THIS: You have nothing to lose. The absolute worst thing that can happen is that she has a boyfriend and/or says she's not interested. Then you move on knowing that , "Hey...at least I tried. I have balls as big as churchbells...I am a great man...and there are more girls out there." But if you DON'T talk to her you could spend all your life wondering what if.

Better to regret DOING something than NOT DOING something.

But I honestly don't think you'd have any regrets either way. You win or lose but at least you got off the bench.

Ask some of the girls in here....perhaps they'll tell you some pointers...but I think that no matter what a simple hello and would you like to go out sometime will do the trick...just be you. IN FACT - I think that most beautiful women are just waiting for somebody to honestly approach them and talk to them...I think most men are intimidated by beautiful women so they won't ask 'em out. The babes only get the sharks, in that case.

Good luck young brother.

ted
 
Go after it. The worst she can say is no. At least try to get her to have lunch of coffee with you and actually talk to her. You may find out her personality is shite.

Telling women you post on UltimateMetal is a sure-fire way to make a great first impression!
 
I couldn't give you any better advice than what Ted just gave you. You are not exactly an ugly man Nick, so she may be a little intimidated by you. Just don't rush things.
 
In the Netherlands we have a saying;

If you don't shoot you always miss.

Be explicit as possible to her in your body talk, eyes and what you say that you are very interested in her.

It's the biggest compliment you can give her. If she's not interested, leave it at that, but meet her and show her that you are interested.

Don't worry about looking nervous. Being nervous is good! Its a sign that you value her. That you think meeting and talking to her is important to you.

Also, and this is the most important thing to do:

Be your goddamn self!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Be unassuming. Do not ever pretend to be something your not.
Honesty from the very first second.

I wish you good luck man. I'll be thinking about you :)
 
wow.....I KNEW i could count on your opinions! Seriously, thank you all! I really, really appreciate every piece of advice you have ALL given me, and i will try my absolute damnedest to do you all proud and most importantly,prove to myself that i can actually ask out a girl without freaking out.

The best time to make my move is on Thursday, which is when I KNOW she's headed to the mall for work. That's the one day i'll be sure to run into her. Thing is, i just hope that my Political Science class gets out early again, but judging from the past couple classes, i most likely will. Get in class at 4pm, spend a good hour studying a foreign form of government, and again, judging from the past couple classes(we started this unit last Tuesday), i'll be out by 5pm, instead of the usual 5:30pm. If not, like I said, i know where she works and i literally live right across the street from it. But I don't really wanna bother her at work, and if i walk in, i'd feel obligated to order something, even though their breadsticks are to die for. :)
 
Wicked, go to where she works (as long as she deals with the public) and say to her "hey I know you from the bus. My name is Nick. She should tell you her name and tell you her something like 'it's nice to meet you' then you ask her if she would like to grab a bite to eat (there in the mall) after she gest off work." Don't make a formal date at first. She may say that she has to "close" and the mall and food places will be closed after she gets off, then you ask for a date.... just a food date. You ask her if she would like to go out to eat with you on a night when she is off.
Don't take her to McDonalds, nor a sophisticated place either. Ask her to go with you to a Mom and Pop cafe or something. The rest is up to you....



Bryant
 
You swear you saw her looking at you? I doubt it? You are probably just imagining things. I mean you seem to be fucked up in the head anyways. I bet she thinks you are a stalker of some sort. My advice is to stay away from her so she doesn't kick you in the nuts and then call security. Stay in your room and continue to rock back and forth and contemplate suicide.
 
nataservant said:
You swear you saw her looking at you? I doubt it? You are probably just imagining things. I mean you seem to be fucked up in the head anyways. I bet she thinks you are a stalker of some sort. My advice is to stay away from her so she doesn't kick you in the nuts and then call security. Stay in your room and continue to rock back and forth and contemplate suicide.
Click to expand...
wow thats good advice there :err: I think you far more fucked up than Nick could ever possibly be .... my advice to you is not fuck with Nick he is our friend and you would be suprised at what we can acomplish as a group you wouldnt be the first flaming troll we have had bounced from here another bit of advice if I may Mind your own buisness ...FOAD
Jonah666.jpg
 
Is that a tear coming out of your eye?
How long did it take you to get that pose down?
Not long enough because your picture is crap.
Thank you, come again.
 
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