say something about ... yourself!

I think I've finally broken. I might lose my job tomorrow because one of my employees may have stolen $60 bucks out of the register. He's 17 and ghetto as shit so I wouldn't put it past him. But oh, how shit can climb uphill. As assistant manager and the only manager there it is my fault, which I accept. However, when my manager implied that I may lose my job, I just cracked. It's always one step forward, two steps back. I work 50 hrs a week and go to college 3 days a week. I've been busting my ass trying to get out of parents house and into an apartment with my gf of 5 yrs, whom I seldom see anymore due to our schedules. I have no time for hobbies and I have a piece of shit car which is literally always on E. I lost financial aid due over some bullshit that had nothing to do with my performance(3.0 gpa) and so I have to pay my own tuition which I might not be able to do now.

Today in the car I just snapped and cried. I haven't cried in years.

I had to get this off my chest because my gf is asleep at her apartment(which she fucking can afford on her own).

tl;dr = I am a 23 years old failure-to-launch story. I was born a streetrat and I will die a streetrat and I am just tired of trying.
 
Dude, don't stop. You're 23 years old; you're practically still a baby...you have your whole life ahead of you. You don't know for sure that you're going to lose your job, and with your qualifications as manager of what I assess as being a retail job or supermarket, you will find another job, don't worry. The early twenties are fucking hard, that's why everyone has so much fun because our lives pretty much suck. There's no decent job, you're inundated with tons of work and college if you go, and you just scrape by until you have enough experience to move forward. You're just paying your dues, and I know that sounds like a shitty thing to say, but it's true. One day you will look back on all of this and laugh, trust me.

What is the rush, anyway? I know moving out into your own apartment and such is nice, but you're in college; save your money and stay with your parents until you either graduate or leave school. You're making yourself miserable trying to do too much with too little. If you just HAVE to have an apartment, why don't you move in with your gf and pay half her rent (provided that she wants to move in with you)? It's good that you're a go-getter, but sometimes you gotta know your limits.
 
Today in the car I just snapped and cried. I haven't cried in years.

I had to get this off my chest because my gf is asleep at her apartment(which she fucking can afford on her own).

tl;dr = I am a 23 years old failure-to-launch story. I was born a streetrat and I will die a streetrat and I am just tired of trying.

You have a car, a girlfriend, that's more than I can say for myself at 23. Chin up, bro.
 
I moved out of my parents house for the first time at 23 myself. I moved in with my girlfriend at the time and about a year later I was back at home, having much the same dilemma as yourself. I am here to tell you that ultimately it's not a big fucking deal. Roll with the punches and do what you can to help yourself along the way and everything will work out. It did for me :)
 
the GF and I are moving into our house next weekend.
Tired of living in this shitty apt.
Still working on selling my house. This weather isnt helping. No one is out looking at houses when it's 5 degrees and snowy.
 
Thanks for the positive comments peeps. it was a low day for sure, I guess all the stress just got to me. Turns out I mis-counted the drawers(which I am claiming is due to exhaustion) and I still have my job. yea things are tough all over and it's all about the grind. I shouldn't take what I have for granted, especially since I've worked for it all myself.

also good luck Kriggs, it took my gf's mom 2 1/2 yrs to sell her house.
 
After 10 months of unemployment, it is finally over. Had an interview today at the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation here in Seattle and they hired me on the spot. I was not expecting that at all. What an epic feeling it is to get hired like that! I've never been so stoked for an employment opportunity!
 
It's nice when things happen like that. Good for you! :)

I'm burnt on life. It was a year of family stress, way too many funerals and way too many bad and stressful thing happening to friends and acquaintances. After Thanksgiving I'mma gonna pack a bag and go hide in the Keys for a few months and get a new perspective, and fish a lot.