scraping the bottom of the barrel

[einride]

if you're like me and have a decently sized music collection and have been buying and selling things for a while, then you probably also have a bunch of stuff that is worth so little on the market that you basically cannot even give it away on discogs.

i'm talking the real bottom of the bargain bin stuff here, the albums that NO ONE wants. that you'd have to pay someone to take. the stuff with cut-out barcodes and five layers of price tags, last one being $0.99 and you're the sucker that ended up thinking "what the hey, how bad can it be" and taking it home.

i don't mean to say that these albums necessarily are bad, but just that for whatever reason they are generally undesirable. whether you like them or hate them but can't bring yourself to throw them out, let's talk about them. maybe skip the obvious stuff like the best of deep purple collection you bought at the gas station and go for the real obscure shit.

PRO TIP: if you have your things on discogs you can sort your collection by median value and start from the bottom to unearth some, errr, gems

rutthna "doomsdaylight" (median price $2.99)

this is a member or two from thyrfing doing black metal, distinctly darker than thyrfing of course but you can tell it is related. i always liked thyrfing for the most part and i think this is surprisingly well done too. it's nothing really revolutionary but it catchy, has some Groove(tm) to it and generally decent songwriting.

sapfhier "trollskogen" (median price $2.44)

i LOVE this album. this is "bedroom black metal" at it's finest. i know that the drum and synth sounds are stock from the General MIDI bank that was included with modplug tracker and i'm HERE FOR IT. the fucking troll forest feeling is 100% awesome great and inspired as fuck. this digital early 2000's sound is becoming retro cool in its own right. love it. if you find this for $2.50 buy it, it's the fuckin bees knees

sleeping gods "new sensation" (median price $2.60)

if you ever end up with this album, know that you cannot ever get rid of it. no one will take it. besides having some *TERRIBLE* cover art, it is german and some sort of post-melodic death metal goth whatever. it's like the least cool thing i could imagine. i mean it is clearly completely inessential but does it actually suck? well... truthfully, at its best, it's not that bad. "H99" is a pretty catchy ass song that is turn-of-the-millennium as fuck. if this was swedish and had a niklas sundin photoshop cover it would maybe have done better

madrigal "i die, you soar" (median price $3.24)

a swedish band that was i guess one of nuclear blast's worst signings because while i remember them having a VERY brief moment in the sun (getting interviews in large metal mags etc) in the early 00's, it didn't take long before literally no one cared and the album's been a bargain bin staple ever since. what it is: a bunch of swedes completely ripping off "draconian times" by paradise lost. honestly, you could do worse.

devil's whorehouse "revelation unorthodox" (median price $3.68)

ok let's end with a huge fucking whopper of a stinker. i mean i've never heard this before but i made it through about 30 seconds of the song above so now i'm even more sure it sucks. i ended up with this when buying a huge lot of CD's and it just suuucks. i mean i know it sucks from the cover. i know it sucks because they used the MS Word stock font "Chiller" for the album title. i don't need to hear it. it absolutely sucks ass. i know it sucks because it's MEMBERS OF MARDUK PRETENDING THEY'RE DANZIG AND IT'S RECORDED IN ABYSS STUDIOS I'M PRETTY SURE AND oh my god this is the most embarrassing garbage i think has ever existed. they're trying to be fucking danzig but they're using autotune. the first song i found on youtube is called "bondage goddess". i hate everything about this.

 

[Ellestin]

Oooh boy I'm going to love digging shit up for this. Great idea

 

[NAD]

I am 78.2498% convinced that I reviewed that Devil's Whorehouse album for Royal Carnage back in the day. Released on Halloween 2003..............hmm.

Well if I don't have the promo buried in a box (I found said box a few days ago even), I'd probably pay you $1 for it. Listening above, it's pretty bad. But I've paid good money for worse! In fact I probably own an actual Danzig album worse than this.

 

[einride]

I am 78.2498% convinced that I reviewed that Devil's Whorehouse album for Royal Carnage back in the day. Released on Halloween 2003..............hmm.

Well if I don't have the promo buried in a box (I found said box a few days ago even), I'd probably pay you $1 for it. Listening above, it's pretty bad. But I've paid good money for worse! In fact I probably own an actual Danzig album worse than this.

yes take it off my hands please, i feel my will to live draining away just from the knowledge that i own this wretched thing

maybe i should just send you a good ol' rc (anti-)care package

 

[NAD]

Yeah man, we should do some Royal Covid packages. I found a stash of about 300 CD-Rs the other day, and a whole bunch of random music gear that I was gonna donate. Anybody want some Ektomorf promos and worn out New Balance trail shoes?

 

[Krilons Resa]

Oh man. I had some stinkers that were included in some CD Lots that I, for some dumb reason, bought on EBay back in the day. I'm talking bubble-jet printed cover art sorta stuff. I've probably tried selling them back on Ebay for .01 auction and they just remained on my shelf due to a communal market scoff. Alas, I actually pulled about 10 CD's of this variety from my shelf about 6 months ago to make some room, recycle the jewel cases, and toss the shelf-turds into the trash. They no longer infringe upon my personal space and I rest a little easier at night knowing that I incrementally boosted the Quality:Quantity ratio of my collection.

 

[NAD]

I listed a Taake vinyl boxset on Discogs for a long time, it was missing the t-shirt (which I still wear), and had one tear in the lid corner. I priced it accordingly but received so many absurd questions that I eventually took it down. Good because I like the boxset! I just listen to the CDs instead.

Not as silly as when I tried to sell some rare David Bowie CDs for a friend. They were some early pressings and worth $30 or so, I told him I'd give it a shot. After one year, I received one single message: "will you sell me this CD on eBay?"

I put a Limp Bizkit CD on half.com for 99 cents for a long time, it never moved. I eventually just gave it away with a bunch of other CDs of similar quality. LMAO @ shelf-turds hahahaha I should've done that instead!

 

[Krilons Resa]

Dude, the jewel cases were worth so much more than the actual CD's they housed. I get so many broken jewel cases (usually the hinge or the center nipple that holds the cd in place) in the mail that they were all utilized a while ago.

I've sold some CD's on Ebay for mega $$$ back in the day by rifling through used bins and knowing the market value of a bunch of shit and knowledge of the ug rarities. For the most part, them days are gone. I'd guess it's like that for vinyl these days though. Everyone is unloading their CD's nowaday and I'm loving it. The shit that's been steadily coming into a local Newbury Comics near me is insane. Every week I find some amazing shit that I can't believe people actually sold. The kids working there said they've never seen anything like it. That peeps are coming in with big boxes of stuff and that usually means a bunch of Scream DVDs and Hootie CDs....Not so! I just hope they are unloading them in favor of digital and not because they are hard up for cash due to these current times we are dealing with.

 

[SonOfNun]

I've gotten more than one copy of this as a freebie with my orders. It's not terrible but I have no use for it and I really don't need multiple copies.

 

[SonOfNun]

I've sold some CD's on Ebay for mega $$$ back in the day by rifling through used bins and knowing the market value of a bunch of shit and knowledge of the ug rarities.

I need to visit record stores more often to see what I can find but even before the pandemic it was never easy to leave the house with the little ones.

I still find deals like that online sometimes and I'll pick them up knowing they are worth much more than what's being charged.

 

[einride]

I've gotten more than one copy of this as a freebie with my orders. It's not terrible but I have no use for it and I really don't need multiple copies.

Country of origin: South Africa
Formed in: 2009
Genre: Melodic Black/Death Metal
Lyrical themes: Christianity, Faith
Current label: Vision of God Records

that's the least appealing collection of metal band attributes i've ever seen

also what the hell is that cover supposed to be

 

[einride]

if i REALLY want to dig into the ABSOLUTE dregs of my collection then i have a big box of promos and loose cd's that don't even deserve a jewelcase, those aren't even entered into my discogs list

maybe i'll eventually abandon all hope and go there

 

[SonOfNun]

I don't know but that's one of the things that turned me off about it.

 

[Krilons Resa]

if i REALLY want to dig into the ABSOLUTE dregs of my collection then i have a big box of promos and loose cd's that don't even deserve a jewelcase, those aren't even entered into my discogs list

maybe i'll eventually abandon all hope and go there

That sure sounds like a lot more fun than rebuilding your house.

 

[einride]

random music gear that I was gonna donate

i'm listening

 

[NAD]

I've sold some CD's on Ebay for mega $$$ back in the day by rifling through used bins and knowing the market value of a bunch of shit and knowledge of the ug rarities. For the most part, them days are gone. I'd guess it's like that for vinyl these days though. Everyone is unloading their CD's nowaday and I'm loving it. The shit that's been steadily coming into a local Newbury Comics near me is insane. Every week I find some amazing shit that I can't believe people actually sold. The kids working there said they've never seen anything like it. That peeps are coming in with big boxes of stuff and that usually means a bunch of Scream DVDs and Hootie CDs....Not so! I just hope they are unloading them in favor of digital and not because they are hard up for cash due to these current times we are dealing with.

This is awesome, except the possible rent-money-massacre, yikes. What is this being called in the US now? The K-shaped economy?

Also I'd have to say that the Scream films are probably the most consistent horror franchise I've seen. I've made quite a point of watching terrible horror sequels (9 Hellraisers, 4 Crows, 5 Prophecies, etc.) and unlike all those other piles of sequel-turds, the Scream sequels are all pretty solid. Wes Craven Über Alles.

i'm listening

Mostly random instrument and speaker cables, some of which might work! Headphones that probably don't work. And one of those ampwedge thingies. These were found in a box I've had in a closet for 6 years. I think it was packed up in a move and never opened. If you want any... let me know! I kept the two guitar stands. I was just shopping for guitar stands and instead found two of my old ones, csore!!1!

I also still owe Hell Mike's kids a box of random things from probably 8 years ago now. I'll have to adjust to teenage taste by the time I get that wrapped up.

 

[einride]

i doubt any of that stuff is worth shipping across the pond, thanx!!! tho

 

[Ellestin]

Median price €5.49 (yeah that's a bit pricey sorry)
Eminenz was mocked a lot for their terrible taste even in Germany, which is something you have to work hard for. Can't say I hate this album but man, these choir synths are waaaaay too much after about half a song. And they NEVER stop. Also who remembers that label, Last Episode? They used to have shittons of these 3rd-4th rate German bands and would always manage to get them an opening slot on every random tour back in the early 00's. I called them merch time bands.

 

[Ellestin]

sapfhier "trollskogen" (median price $2.44)

this is beautiful

Here is Even Vast from Belgium:


median price €4
I remember that the big Saturn store I used to haunt back in Cologne had 3 or 4 of these tagged as second hand at any given time. Musically we're looking at basic melodic doom with female vocals (a bit in the vein of Anneke van Giesbergen but not as good). I don't remember how I parted with my copy. Probably slipped it as a "gift" in some discogs sale.


median price €3.25
Sun of the Sleepless/Nachtmahr split - that one is absolutely worth digging up, if you're willing to pay thrice as much for postage than for the actual CD. SotS is one of Schwadorf's side projects, whose 1999 EP, an excellent angry version of Empyrium, was followed up by a (forgettable) album only in 2017. Between the two, we have this split with Nachtmahr, which has pretty solid material from both bands (including a "Dunkelheit" cover). The SotS stuff dabbled in romantic electro a little, something Prophecy bands used to be good at in a time window from approximately 2004 to 2004.

 

[Doom]

I have a bunch of Prophecy albums from that time period, because for a while I had this Prophecy subscription where they'd send and charge you for every album they released, whether you wanted it or not. I only signed up for an initial incentive, and then felt bad about cancelling it straight away haha.

A lot of these fit well into this thread. Perfectly OK music that very few people cared about at the time, and certainly nobody wants to buy anymore, from bands nobody remembers like Mysterium and Ewigheim.