The official WRITE A LETTER TO ANY BOARDER thread

Dear forum,

The threads in the past week have been sub-par. Kindly stop sucking so much cock and get back on track.

- some asshole

P.S. By "back on track" I mean "more tits plz"
P.P.S. What can I say, I'm a simple man.
 
Dear Danny Glover,

Be Kind Rewind was okay but not worth the admission fee; it needed more "you", probably.

Apologetically not yours,
some nobody laddie
 
dear det som,

do you ever go to school?

best wishes, rawra

ps - Dear John
–noun Informal.
1. a letter from a woman informing her boyfriend or fiancé that she is ending their relationship or informing her husband that she wants a divorce: Nothing is worse for a soldier's morale than getting a Dear John.
2. any letter terminating a relationship.
Also called Dear John letter.

[Origin: 1940–45]
 
Yes John be proud of your last name, and entire name. John Jones? That is pretty excellent.

My name is legally hyphenated. So it's long. Though I only use my dad's last name. I don't know why because my mom's is Morrison, which is pretty hard not to spell correctly or pronounce properly. My dad's is Baltusis, it's Lithuanian :kickass: but... everyone pronounces it wrong, and... once in 4th grade a substitute teacher was calling attendance and said "Jennifer Baltutu? Baltaco?" WHERE THE FUCK DID THAT COME FROM?!?!?!?! BALTACO!?
 
This thread was made by

Bill Wozarth-Lord Foul I think?
Will Boxarth-Laura
Will Boxart-Me
Bill Zobarth-Me
Ill Boxart-Me
Robozarth 3000-Me
The Bozzerator-Me
Bozzy-I Don't know?
Almighty Bozarth-Me as a parody of his song "Almighty Father"
 
Dear Laura,

I cannot breathe through my nose, and my head hurts like hell. Stop giving me AIDS!

Cordially, C.R. Beard.