This one is for Gugs

Conspicuously Absent

Linguistically Confused
Mar 27, 2005
8,760
4
38
Berlin
The Sport Of Drunk-Driving
Late one night, a routine police vehicle was parked outside a popular Canadian tavern. After last call the police officer noticed a man leaving the bar so intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the street for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity and trying his keys on five different vehicles, the man finally managed to find his car--which he subsequently fell into. He was there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off.

Finally the man started the car, switched the wipers on and off (it was a fine dry night) flicked the blinkers on, then off, honked the horn and then switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle forward a few metres, reversed a little and then remained still for a few more minutes as more vehicles left the establishment. At last he pulled out of the parking lot and started to drive slowly down the road.

The police officer, having patiently waited all this time, now started up his patrol car, put on the flashing lights, and promptly pulled the man over and carried out a Breathalyzer test. To his amazement the Breathalyzer indicated no evidence of the man having consumed any alcohol at all!

Dumbfounded, the officer said, "I'll have to ask you to accompany me to the police station. This Breathalyzer equipment must be broken."

"I doubt it, "said the man, smiling. "Tonight I'm the designated decoy."