w:o:a 2003 - if this is armageddon, then who the hell are you?

[rahvin]

in a continuing effort to have people make fun of me, here comes this thread aimed to tell about my misadventures in wacken and have a jolly good time about it. as for the reasons for the subject of this thread, i'll get there in due time, meaning if i ever feel like justifying myself, which i don't.

first and foremost i want to talk about the trip and the life in wacken and the people i've met there. it's possible that most of you don't even care, but i'm that cruel. can't cure cruelty when you're my age, now can you?

leavetakings
left town early in the morning, heading for the airport. a couple of flights would take me to hamburg, but from there everything'd be a big pretzel-shaped hole. just my luck: on the second flight i happen to stumble into three italian guys headed for wacken. i join in driven by desperation and a sense of impending doom that materializes into them losing all their baggage. since the idea of going from "oh, wow, you're going to wacken, hello!" to "oh, wow, you lost all you had with you, goodbye!" didn't sound very polite, i stuck with them until they regained all their belongings and we could finally get to the next stop: hamburg, altona station. this happened by means of a bus, and as is always the cases with buses the trip was totally uninteresting.
then one would have to get to the humorously named (thanks alyona) town of itzehoe (try saying that out loud five times with an english pronounciation) - a ghost town whose inhabitants were once trampled by cows, who ended up covering the place in dung and putting up cow-themed posters at every street corner - by train, and yet another bus would eventually get the weary traveler to the festival site. the italians and i did all of that and got to wacken by seven pm, wednesday. a few drops of rain greeted us at the entrance. i thought it was an omen, while in fact it was exactly the opposite.

wacken is as wacken does
i set camp near the italians. there was plenty of room and i occupied it all by using a very peculiar strategy for building my tent which consisted in making it fall unto itself all over again every ten seconds. by friday it looked as if i had set camp over an active volcano, by saturday as if the volcano had erupted, and by sunday morning as if a very angry volcano god had come up to stare at my tent and his first words had been "what the fuck?".
i don't regret having slept in that tent for four nights, mainly because i'm stupid and i almost never regret anything, but it was pretty intense as far as experiences go. one night there was this guy being sick all around my tent while i was sleeping and it was like he was actually there inside with me. quality time, i tell you.
the climate took the most unexpected turn and got hotter than the innermost pit of hell. throughout all of thursday, friday, and saturday, we got like 38°C the whole day, very little shade, very little water. my body became a temple where sunburns gathered to pray and bake a quiche - you just had to put it on my arm for a second - so in the night i was freezing from the sudden drop in temperature. along with the dirt and the general lack of hygene, i had become some sort of black walking totem, which might be grim and tr00 but is not what i wanted out of life.
the festival area was huge, with camping sites stretching for miles all around it. there was one wide "antechamber" with shops and beer gardens lining the perimeter, and the enormous stage area, scattered with more bars and merchandise booths sticking out like oases of shade in the vast barren plains scorched by the sun. needless to say, the whole place got littered and more or less torn apart by enthusiast metalheads during the 3-day period where the shows took place. i think about thirty thousand people were there on friday and saturday. i saw noone without a metal shirt except for me.

the best part and the only reason i would do that again at some point in the future is the people i met. here's the list:

nogie: [opeth/chat-off topic forum, highest counting poster on um] wins the most timely presence award for always being there, getting me a ticket and generally providing good company through the mad days. it was a pretty meaningful experience for her as she's going to go join the army for two years pretty soon and - coming from israel - this was her last opportunity to see some of europe for a while. i hope she likes both the places she's visiting and the company we tried to provide her with, so as to make the dreaded 2 years a tad shorter and having something to look forward to. nogie, we'll be waiting for you.

veil the sky: [opeth/chat-off topic forum] along with his mates wins the best company of friends i've ever met award. now i can't even being to say how much i love this guy and his friends. i'd add that i also love his girlfriend, but that would just sound weird. anyway, i've had like the time of life hanging around with them (not to mention the drinking ) and i can't wait to meet them again in london - where i'm spending about a week later this month. stu, and see you soon.

alyona: [opeth/chat-off topic forum, stu's girlfriend]: wins the most stylish way to inflict physical pain award. she knows why. she's also very useful for smuggling sword-like weapons onto planes as she's got special powers that can confuse metal detectors. and if you think all i'm saying is way too cryptic, you're probably right. aly, see you soon too.

lamia: [dark tranquillity forum]: along with her boyfriend, wins the sweetest couple in the known universe award. not only is she herself a smart and caring girl, but when i got to meet the both of them together i felt like i was gently bathing in sugary waters. they're just so nice. lamia's boyfriend promised he would come and post here too, and that's yet another good reason for liking them both a lot. lamia, i'll never forget the first time we met we were one small step from discussing spinoza.

bleakest harvest: [opeth/chat-off topic forum]: wins the fastest guy to recognize me award, and that's no small feat seeing as how we never actually talked that much on um and i didn't even know/remember he was coming. it's been so nice to meet him too though, and this just goes to show that these boards are actually crammed full of cool people, and you just have to get to know them a little. bleakest harvest, have a good time in hamburg and come back safe and sound.

phyrus: [dark tranquillity forum]: wins the happiest face i've ever seen on a metalhead award. we met very briefly and then we couldn't keep in touch to meet again, but just thinking about how he looked happy makes me smile. and i don't think we were that drunk. so no matter how somber and mysteryous you look in your avatar, remember you can't hide forever! phyrus, hope you check some threads around here.

three random italian guys [those i met on the plane to hamburg]: win the random italian guys award. they were cool and nice to me, and they made me break the rule about never ever approaching anybody from my country when i'm abroad. this must be worth something. random italian guys, you're not seeing this, i know.

wacken security guards [they had "metal guard" written on the back of their shirts. oh god.]: die.

 

[rahvin]

and now let's talk about what you're all here for, you filthy long-haired unemployed metallers who think all the prefixes for international phone numbers should start with a triple six.

i haven't seen all the bands in wacken, mainly because i couldn't care less about some and i was quite busy getting drunk with veil the sky and his friends anyway. i'll now comment briefly on each of the shows i've actually seen or at least heard from start to finish (it was possible to stay in the stage area without actually being that close to the stage and still hear the band).

circle ii circle - 8/10 - this band featuring ex savatage singer zak stevens was a very nice surprise right at the start of the festival. i love this guy's voice and he does sound spectacula live. the best songs out of their album ('into the wind' and 'waiting in silence') were wisely dealt out one after the other. it's just too bad the rest of their material doesn't have much to show for it except for zak's vocals. with only one record out, they couldn't spend their 45' with a set comprising only their own songs, so they resorted to covers. they did very good versions of savatage's 'taunting cobras' and 'edge of thorns' (the crowd went wild on that one, and i loved singing along myself), and a standard, careful rendition of metallica's 'sanitarium'. one of the best bands at wacken.

running wild - 7/10 - i want to make it clear that the "cheese factor" accounts for 3 of the 7 points they get. the band is hilarious and, luckily enough, still focuses on the funnier (and better) old classics about pirates and the war of the roses and whatnot. they're way past their prime, but they're sort of honest in what they do and they didn't forget the past for the newer, excruciatingly boring stuff.

the quill - 3/10 - come on, these guys have written a song against satellites in the sky. booed off the planet.

sentenced - 6/10 - they did a no-shit, fast and funny set without the many mellow tunes i always dread they'll be putting in. 'the suicider', 'broken', 'sun won't shine', 'noose', 'nepenthe' and the maiden's cover 'the trooper' all were in the set and they were performed in a very accurate and passionate way. i gave em only a six because of the singer. i hate that guy. he keeps on ranting all the time trying to sound as if he's being sarcastic while making rather arrogant, sexist and trite jokes that show how he's always so full of himself. so you can't sing that well and you're not a stand-up comedian either. next time please try keeping the toilets clean, they badly needed it at wacken.

primal fear - 4000/10 - they actually sing the subject of this thread in one song. it's a real line. and no, it doesn't really mean anything except from what can be seen at first sight. i never really listened to their show, but i remember walking by and overhearing this line. i think i spilled some beer and made a promise to myself to make this one totally senseless series of words *teh* most popular totally senseless series of words in the world. and i'm starting from here. i should add it to my signature.

testament - 10/10 - best show at wacken. i so regret not having been able to get closer to the stage. the played a lot of the old stuff, only the good new songs, and they were a smashing experience. i've been totally crushed by this band: after a short 'low' (the song) moment, they got into 'practice what you preach' and 'sins of omission' at full speed, and as soon as 'd.n.r.' and 'true believer' (their best new songs imo) were done with, it was time for the oldies. they played about half of the legacy album, plus 'into the pit' and a couple of others from the new order. the singer was absolutely perfect and he could change effortlessly from the growls on the hardest songs to the most melodic parts in tunes like 'electric crown' or 'burnt offerings'. they ended their set with 'disciples of the watch' and i felt pure bliss. i want to see them again soon. i want to listen to their records more. i want bootlegs. it was just *that* good.

gamma ray - 2/10 - i was hoping they would at least try and prove kai hansen can still recognize a good idea from the upteenth song about unicorns or heavy metal skies, but i was wrong. except for 'last before the storm' the set focused on the new songs, and managed to pick the worse ones too. there is no need at all to inflict all 8 minutes of 'armageddon' on the audience (especially after primal fear so accurately dealt with the issue) mister hansen looked tired and apathetic while somehow sticking to the belief that "we live in a heavy metal universe". i don't really know where he lives, but please someone take him back home before he's lost forever.

in flames - 7/10 - quite a good show, with fireworks and all. the crowd was really waiting for it. listening to anders friden sing live i feel a tad better and not as angry with in flames as i do when i put r2r on: the vocals are ok. maybe not as death-metallish as they once were, but ok. nothing like the nightmare on their latest material. they played the usual stuff, getting back as far 'behind space', then stopping briefly on 'moonshield', 'gyroscope' (you couldn't hear any of the words on this one... they should really take it out of their set and play either 'the hive' or 'morphing into primal') and 'episode 666' before dedicating the rest of the evening to the newer songs. 'colony' was just ok, but 'trigger', 'system', 'only for the weak' and 'clayman' actually turned out to be much more effective live than in their studio version.
i kinda resented comments like "ok, enough with the disco bullshit now" right after 'only for the weak' and before (i think) 'drifter'. in flames should either realize that they don't care about such labels as 'disco bullshit' - which i reckon translated into nu-metal - or that the newer material is in fact more of a departure from the old standards. it's not because it's fast and heavy that it's less bouncy and easy-listening than colony or clayman. it's a bit like with metallica, who try to reassure people that newly recorded albums are old school just by tuning down the production and getting mindlessly brutal here and there.

thyrfing - 5/10 - that was my first contact with the band. they had fake blood on their faces and fake viking blood in their veins but the music seemed somewhat enjoyable. i think i'll download some of their songs: at some point there were funny noises.

malevolent creation - 7/10 - ah, good old school death metal. aside from the fact that the singer looks like a retired bridge engineer and the songs are getting same-ish of late, they are a nice experience any time. lovely.

masterplan - 6/10 - i don't remember much of masterplan's set, as i spent most of that time making fun of the lyrics and the singer's attitude with stu and friends. i recall being doubled over with laughter for 'kind hearted light' and 'crystal night' and all the mentions of seven skies and seven seas. stu was eagerly waiting for an eagle to soar somewhere, but it unfortunately didn't. towards the end of the set the homoerotic innuendos really got the best of jorn lande and his crew of 50-something power metal stars, and the songs became even longer than their studio version while the singer was busy kissing passionately everything that moved on stage, provided it belonged to the male persuasion. i don't know about jorn's, but our performance of 'crawling from hell' was surely worth a ten.

callenish circle - 7/10 - they're the only band i saw in the 'wet stage', which was probably wet from the sweat of the audience as it was placed in a tent that could have easily been used for creating a medium-sized supernova, or killing people. they were very very good, and they need to be encouraged. the sound was quite bad though and you couldn't hear the guitars, resulting in all the songs sounding quite the same. a cover song of an old pestilence tune only added to the embarrassment, imo.

soilwork - 8/10 - definitely a band that's attracting some attention from the crowds right now. a good, solid set of songs from the latest two records, featuring my personal favourite 'distortion sleep' alongside with classics like 'follow the hollow', 'as we speak' (wow and i say wow), 'natural born chaos'. there's just two small flaws: you never ever get to hear the clean vocals. they're just too soft. they should do something. and: the singer was wearing the exact same shirt he wore in italy last month. i hope he's washed it.

rage - 6/10 - oh, rage. i really don't know what to think about rage. in a way, i think their music started to suck of late and they're not doing anything at all to create something new. on the other hand, they've played their material with a passion and made it even stronger and more enjoyable. the singer shaved himself in a rather funny way for someone who was this close to hair metal twenty years ago. i think i respect them still. but now try going somewhere else with your next record.

vader - 5/10 - although i kinda like the band and they are being serious til the very end, i think the songs they played were a little to technical for 2am, saturday. one just couldn't get into it that much. i'm almost sorry.

slayer - 3/10 - *yawn*. if someone needs me i'm in my tent.


@yayo: you just have to ask.

 

[stefan86]

@rahvin: did you skip watching The Crown?!!?

 

[rahvin]

@rahvin: did you skip watching The Crown?!!? !

yeah, i know what you mean. but i don't remember where i was when they were playing. this tells me i was probably in no condition to enjoy their show.

 

[stefan86]

hmm I saw Soilwork opening up for CoB a couple months ago, and even though i was a pretty big fan of them then they were pretty weak.
But they only played new material pretty much, so that might be the reason.

 

[stefan86]

but i don't remember where i was when they were playing

too much beer?

 

[rahvin]

i don't think soilwork are going to play songs from their older records. as long as you people think natural born chaos is a good album i think you won't be disappointed. and it might be that they're gradually getting over playing that many songs out of figure number five anyway. so i guess it all depends on which soilwork era you like best.

 

[Thanatos]

That sounds so nice, it's good to know you had a good time there, my friend

 

[Hiljainen]

wacken security guards [they had "metal guard" written on the back of their shirts. oh god.]: die.

oh, but this is so metal

anyway, as Thanny said, happy to know you had fun

 

[rahvin]

Didn't you supposed to see lolita aswell?
Or did she just watched all people from distant as she did at Tuska

i don't know... i messaged her but she never showed up at any set place and time for a meeting. i don't think anyone actually saw her this time around either. perhaps she doesn't exist.

 

[Erik]

So... Only forum member I met was Tranquillian, whom I had also met before at a DT show. He had his tent pretty close to mine and was nice and all. Overall, I got much less drunk than I had expected (except on the first of the days) and spent too much on records and shirts when I had promised myself not to (the last day I had EUR 0,35 or so to live on.) I thank various weather gods for sparing us the Rain most of the time. As for the bands, here are my short opinions of the ones I saw:

Testament 10/10, best show I've attended. Near-perfect setlist. My neck is still sore.

Dismember 9/10, tight, enormously great sound, good setlist. The song they played from the new album seemed promising as well although there were a couple of playing mistakes. I'll let that slip as they have a new guitarist.

Slayer 8.5/10, well, they played all of Reign in Blood. What more could one ask for? Possibly not their best performance ever but a solid show.

Carpathian Forest 8/10, I wasn't familiar with much of the song material here but well, it all ruled. Very good show, and you also had the vocalist puking into the microphone at a rather appropriate place in the last song before the encore. Also, it was worth seeing them just to see their bassist. Tee hee. This band would definitely have benefitted from playing at dark instead of like 15:00 in the daytime in scorching sunlight. Oh well.

The Crown 7.5/10, their drummer rules. Also, "1999 - Revolution 666" and "Total Satan" were pretty intense live, as expected. A good show.

Nile 7.5/10, I'd probably have given them more had I heard more than one of the songs they played beforehand. They really did create an atmosphere -- unlike Carpathian Forest they got to play when it was dark. The band were all very energetic and stuff, and the show made me want to check out Nile further even more...

Annihilator 7/10, well, I know none of their songs but it seemed like a good performance. Another band I should check out based on what I saw live.

Thyrfing 7/10, well, yeah. They did what they do very well, and while I weren't familiar with more than a couple of the songs at least I got to scream "JAAA" when the vocalist asked "är det några svenskar här?"

Dew Scented 7/10, THRASH. Gets a little boring when you aren't familiar with any of their songs but tight and thrashy = good.

In Flames 6.5/10, I hate the way they rape "Moonshield" and "Behind Space" nowadays. Really fucking flashy pyrotechnics though. Also, they didn't play "Cloud Connected," and that's got to be a good thing. "Gyroscope" was good.

Sentenced 6/10, well, we got "Noose" and "Nepenthe" although the last sounds wrong with the "new" vocalist. A good show though the vocalist's between-songs banter was pretty pathetic at times. Didn't really seem like the band was 100% into the show at all times either. Nice to have seen them though.

Dark Funeral, I won't rate them, but suffice to say I left after the fourth song or so due to excessive boredom.

 

[Erik]

testament - 10/10 - best show at wacken. i so regret not having been able to get closer to the stage. the played a lot of the old stuff, only the good new songs, and they were a smashing experience. i've been totally crushed by this band: after a short 'low' (the song) moment, they got into 'practice what you preach' and 'sins of omission' at full speed, and as soon as 'd.n.r.' and 'true believer' (their best new songs imo) were done with, it was time for the oldies. they played about half of the legacy album, plus 'into the pit' and a couple of others from the new order. the singer was absolutely perfect and he could change effortlessly from the growls on the hardest songs to the most melodic parts in tunes like 'electric crown' or 'burnt offerings'. they ended their set with 'disciples of the watch' and i felt pure bliss. i want to see them again soon. i want to listen to their records more. i want bootlegs. it was just *that* good.

I must say I agree 100% with what you are saying above. That was one fucking amazing concert.

EDIT:

i gave em only a six because of the singer. i hate that guy. he keeps on ranting all the time trying to sound as if he's being sarcastic while making rather arrogant, sexist and trite jokes that show how he's always so full of himself. so you can't sing that well and you're not a stand-up comedian either.

I agree with this 100% as well. Someone should turn off his microphone between songs. "This goes out to all the ladies in the audience... I really need to get laid tonight, so...", "Life is like a box of chocolates, tastes like shit"

>_<

STFU PLZ KTHX

 

[rahvin]

I agree with this 100% as well. Someone should turn off his microphone between songs. "This goes out to all the ladies in the audience... I really need to get laid tonight, so...", "Life is like a box of chocolates, tastes like shit"

not to mention the point where he said they were playing the last song about 20' minutes into the show, nobody as much as raised an eyebrow and he still went on with the pathetic joke "oh, but you know we don't give a fuck about you. we hate you". lame ass idiot, people have heard this before.

i'm sorry we didn't meet you (or tranquillian for that matter): i wouldn't possibly recognize you guys in such a crowd of tall northerners, i'm afraid. maybe next time we hit the same festival we can arrange something in advance?

 

[Erik]

i'm sorry we didn't meet you (or tranquillian for that matter): i wouldn't possibly recognize you guys in such a crowd of tall northerners, i'm afraid. maybe next time we hit the same festival we can arrange something in advance?

Yep. That would be next year for me, I'm fairly certain...

 

[Lolita Vampiriá]

I'm back from Wacken.
What a tiring trip it was... .
I didn't even see any um-ers. Rahvin couldn't obviously find me nor our camp. And I couldn't find him and Nogie later. Where were you guys??

Actually, I'm lucky to be alive. I had an accident also, I broke my knee . Some campers close to us have dug a hole (= open grave) in the ground and I fell in it. It was dark and I was very, very drunk.

So I was carried to the first aid by some people. I got a painkiller so I managed to handle the rest of the evening. But obviously pain got back next morning and had to start drinking again... Luckily I was able to walk but it was very slow and the pain started to come back at some point again. I got quite depressed and didn't care to see so many bands .

Something about the music then... Me and my girlfriend tried to get to Metal karaoke to sing in the first evening but they said Finnish people are not allowed to sing there . I wonder what have happened earlier then. Some Finnish bastards obviously .

I saw Sentenced, Twisted Sister, Slayer, some songs by Testament, some Dark Funeral, some Soilwork, some Nile, and there were a lot of bands I heard from the Paulaner beer garden .

So Wacken 2003 was a huge disappointment for me because of the accident... Otherwise it was so much fun to be in our camp and drink beer. I met a lot of my old friends and made new ones too. I wish I could have met rahvin, Noga, veil the sky and Alyona ... Maybe on some other occation then.

@rahvin: you said Senteced's singer Ville Laihiala acted like a bastard on stage. Well, you just have to understand that it is his sick humour and he doesn't mean nothing with it. It is just his style to annoy people. In real life that guy is very nice and polite.

If someone is interested, here are pictures and a story made by a friend of mine: http://777-team.org/Menot/Festarit/Wacken-2003/
I am called "Sussu" in some pic. So maybe you'll find me in other pics too.


There are also a bit x-rated pictures of me but you'll have to find them on your own.

 

[rahvin]

@rahvin: you said Senteced's singer Ville Laihiala acted like a bastard on stage. Well, you just have to understand that it is his sick humour and he doesn't mean nothing with it. It is just his style to annoy people. In real life that guy is very nice and polite.

i have never met him personally. i just think this kind of humour is really out of place and sad, especially on stage. it also sounds quite forced, as if he was trying badly to seem gifted with brains. i didn't object to him being aggressive in his remarks, i objected to his remarks being just ludicrously petty and childish.
if anybody's looking for an example of someone who gets kinda outspoken on stage, take for instance vnv nation singer ronan harris. i heard him say quite a lot of stuff that could be considered in bad taste and i didn't mind (i actually liked most of them), because they were actually funny and at least made sense. it's not ville that doesn't mean anything with his pseudo-witticism: it's the comments themselves that are totally devoid of meaning.

 

[Erik]

I kind of even wish I had never even seen that Sentenced concert because the singer's attitude & comments really put me off. I see the band in a very different light now.

Anders of In Flames was also very full of himself ("We want to thank all our opening bands, it's great to have so many bands opening for us", "We're the best band in the world", etc.) but at least he came across as somewhat tounge-in-cheek and funny. Ville just made me cringe.

 

[Lolita Vampiriá]

About Senteced and Ville Laihiala... The man has had a very rough times in his life lately. That might not be an excuse for such lame jokes on stage but if you knew what was going on... Well, it's not my place to talk about it here.

I have seen a dozens of Sentenced shows and the jokes at Wacken were stupid - I admit. And such has not never happened before - although he makes jokes as I mentioned before.

 

[Thanatos]

Dismember 9/10, tight, enormously great sound, good setlist. The song they played from the new album seemed promising as well although there were a couple of playing mistakes. I'll let that slip as they have a new guitarist.

Damn you phyre I'd kill to see them live.

 

[stefan86]

@Thanatos: I also saw Dismember live some months ago, the show cost 6$ and they kicked ass