What do your farts smell like?

[Lord_Of_This_World]

Mine smell like when you walk past a café.

 

[breaklose]

mine smell like fuck all

 

[Etaoin]

 

[Lord_Of_This_World]

rotating flowers with faces?

 

[Etaoin]

depends on what I eat

 

[bleed_black_orchid]

mine are pretty non offensive apart from when Ive drank shitloads of beer then they just stink..

 

[Susie]

Mine are like flowers and all yeh favourite binbags, i suppose the day after a tandori, they smell like tandori, which i find even worse.

 

[Brynjar]

i don't fart, unless i'm taking a dump. and then it smells like the rest of my shit, i guess.

 

[bleed_black_orchid]

thats a blatent lie everyone farts.

 

[Light]

mine smell like country bus-stops

 

[Brynjar]

thats a blatent lie everyone farts.

wrong. i'm on a 24/7 dihorea so if i fart i'll soil my pant. hope you'll understand my reservation for farting.

 

[Lord_Of_This_World]

Can't you close your arse or something?

 

[StevenK]

mine smell like SHIT.

i can have the smelliest farts if i want, we used to have competitions at work.
i could win if the night before i had....
8-12 pints of guiness, any kind of chipper food ( usually a snack box ), then no drink for bed to wash it all down ( i usually bring a litre or two of water to bed ).
those are my deadly ingredients.
that will leave you very very very smelly all next day. my farts used to make peoples eyes water and also used to clear out small to medium sized rooms very quickly and effectively

 

[bleed_black_orchid]

Ive just took notes...thanks ste.

 

[Lord_Of_This_World]

It's usually best to try and be constipated before entering into any competiton of this nature.

 

[Susie]

Whiles in glastonbury, i waited 2 days before using one of those porty bogs for a shit, i was bracing myself for the big day and when i got in there, there was a turd as big as a large cucumber, with a pile of sweetcorn threaded through it not in the toilet but in the sink i stood there and puked me fuckin gutts right up uke: when all i wanted was a dump.

 

[zupi_clone]

Whiles in glastonbury, i waited 2 days before using one of those porty bogs for a shit, i was bracing myself for the big day and when i got in there, there was a turd as big as a large cucumber, with a pile of sweetcorn threaded through it not in the toilet but in the sink i stood there and puked me fuckin gutts right up uke: when all i wanted was a dump.

sound, i mean the look of the shit, theyre works of art. is there anyway to preserve these?

 

[Bambi]

mine smell like SHIT.

i can have the smelliest farts if i want, we used to have competitions at work.
i could win if the night before i had....
8-12 pints of guiness, any kind of chipper food ( usually a snack box ), then no drink for bed to wash it all down ( i usually bring a litre or two of water to bed ).
those are my deadly ingredients.
that will leave you very very very smelly all next day. my farts used to make peoples eyes water and also used to clear out small to medium sized rooms very quickly and effectively

8 pints guinness+stabrakebabra taco chips= stench of death

 

[Lord_Of_This_World]

sound, i mean the look of the shit, theyre works of art. is there anyway to preserve these?

Put it straight in the oven and dry it out slowly then use some boat varnish to preserve it in its glistening glory.

 

[zupi_clone]

Put it straight in the oven and dry it out slowly then use some boat varnish to preserve it in its glistening glory.

cheers lordy! you always come up with the goods! thats given me an idea now, the varnish, like decorate it in different styles, could do flowers on one, aztec designs, celtic spirals like this massive turd >