What the hell is the world coming to?

[Lord of Delusions]

Here's the story: For the past YEAR I have been trying to put a band together. Nothing special, nothing too serious. All I want to do is jam with more than one person at a time, and maybe work on some songs I have written. I have countless ads posted on local sites, and inquired to others I have seen looking for guitar players. For all my posts, I have had a grand total of 3 responses. Non of them panned out. For all the ones I have replied to, I am either too old (32), don't have the look, don't have pro gear, or not able to make it my lifes work. So out of frustration I post a completly bogus ad looking for "other Satan worshipers to assist me in making alchohol/coke induced fury filled music, while burning goats and enslaving first-born children." Believe it or not, that is pretty much how the ad went. How many responces? 23! In a month! What the hell happened to making music for the fun of it?

 

[Melisan]

I dunno about music for the fun of it but that was the funniest thing I've read in ages. You should post more bogus ads and the responses you get.

 

[Lord of Delusions]

You should post more bogus ads and the responses you get.

Good Idea! I even have a name for the band. "Satan's Disneyland" I will set up a e-mail address and everything. Anyone have any ideas to contribute? :hotjump:

 

[Lord of Delusions]

Ok, its done! Here is the ad...

"A new band is arising from the ashes of the city known as Phoenix. We require more minions to complement our core members. Our sound is best described as a culmination of speed metal, thrash, goth, prog, and chamber music. Hopefull slaves must have a dark mind, soul, and wardrobe. Talent is not required, as your soul will be sold and you will be given all you need to overcome any obstacle. We are looking for the following qualifications: extended K9's, more than 20 peircings (visible or not), suicide scars, body modification, and S&M or D&D experince is a plus. Must have a brooding attitude and a penchant towards cannibalism.Any person with the slightest hint of skin color will immediatly be cast into the abyss. If you think you are worthy, you may reply."

Got a mail address for SatansDisneyland! This should be fun... :Spin:
Here is the link-check it before someone throws a fit and it gets cut! http://phoenix.communitymusician.com/index.php?arg=mc_detail&id=252228

 

[Lord of Delusions]

actually there seems to be alot of people looking for guitar players here, its just that they think they are minutes away from a world tour, or they don't want anyone with facial hair to ruin their chances of getting on Mtv.

 

[Lord of Delusions]

Again! I have been thrown aside again! My God, what do I have to do to get a band together? This time I even went as far as downloading and learning songs that were written by these people I was hoping to hook up with! They needed a 2nd guitar and I was willing and ready, so what do they do at the last minute? They get another bass player and teach the original bass player how to play guitar! WTF? Thats it! I am going to learn how to play the zither!!!!!!!

Oh, and by the way, my fake ad was pulled within a week of posting and I am permanetly banned from ever using Mindmail.com again....lol

 

[ROTLD]

The problem with putting ads out when you play bass in this area is that your phone rings off the hook.

That is so true! Why the lack of Bassists in So. Cal.? My last band had a hell of a time finding one.

Those are some funny ads bestwestranger, they'd find you people to jam with out here in CA.

 

[Lord of Delusions]

Maybe I should just learn a bunch of instruments and be like Trent Reznor, without talent. Or fancy cloths. Or money.

 

[Sabbathking]

Both bassists,and guitarists that want to play Black Sabbath material are hard to find here in Connecticut .Luckily I am only a bassist away from a complete line up.

 

[ah87ts]

This is a good thread. I have been in bands where we just wanted to write good, progressive, hard edged music and asked for people with a non-addict state of mind and it seemed all we got was drug/alcohol addicted people.

But then on the other hand, I use to belong to a Christian, progressive metal band. When we played at Christian concerts and events, Christians thought we were too bold but when we played in bars people loved it.

People can be a strange lot. Lots of hypocrisy.

 

[cycosuicide]

Yes. Its truly frightening that some of us are insistent on makin music our life's work. Man....I am in trouble.

 

[Lord of Delusions]

You know, I thought about responding to a couple of ads for Christian bands. I don't have a problem with the idea, it just bugs the shit out of me when people start preachin' and tellin me I'm goin to hell. I just kind of avoid the whole thing all together, though I am probably missing out on some valuable playtime...

 

[Jeff Milne]

Here's the story: For the past YEAR I have been trying to put a band together. Nothing special, nothing too serious. All I want to do is jam with more than one person at a time, and maybe work on some songs I have written. I have countless ads posted on local sites, and inquired to others I have seen looking for guitar players. For all my posts, I have had a grand total of 3 responses. Non of them panned out.

I've had an ad in the recycler for 3 years, and although I've had over 3 responses [I even heard from someone in this very forum, but that was nearly 3 years ago so they probably don't even remember it] nothing has worked out.

 

[Metal up ur azz]

Huh?
I mean im 16,Ive had my bass for what,4 months,I was in a band BEFORE I even had it,weird,I havent found a single problem joining a band...except for the guy with the rythm guitar who doesnt know how to play and wont take courses

 

[Keyser Soze]

except for the guy with the rythm guitar who doesnt know how to play and wont take courses

Sounds like every nu metal band out there... knowledge of the instrument, not required...

 

[ah87ts]

You know, I thought about responding to a couple of ads for Christian bands. I don't have a problem with the idea, it just bugs the shit out of me when people start preachin' and tellin me I'm goin to hell. I just kind of avoid the whole thing all together, though I am probably missing out on some valuable playtime...

I understand what you are saying. Our singer liked to talk but it was never the 'hell stuff'. More of the inner stuff. Dealing with things, life, etc... He had a tendency to keep all eyes on him with his on stage antics and his 'Morrison like' rants in between songs. I know the bands you are talking about. Nice thing we had is that the whole band just came together. Never any ads placed to find other musicians. At times I think that is the best way for a good band to get together.

 

[Lord of Delusions]

Huh?
I mean im 16,Ive had my bass for what,4 months,I was in a band BEFORE I even had it,weird,I havent found a single problem joining a band...except for the guy with the rythm guitar who doesnt know how to play and wont take courses

You do have an advantage over me, being 16 and all. I have responded to alot of ads, and the first reaction from people is "hey cool!", untill they find out how old I am, then they're like, "uh, well, we don't want anyone over 25". I seem to be at a weird age where the young ones think I'm too old, and the old ones think I am too young and don't play their kind of music. Believe me, I can play. Maybe not as well as I should considering as long as I have been at it (9 years), but I definalty don't suck.

 

[Lord of Delusions]

I understand what you are saying. Our singer liked to talk but it was never the 'hell stuff'. More of the inner stuff. Dealing with things, life, etc... He had a tendency to keep all eyes on him with his on stage antics and his 'Morrison like' rants in between songs. I know the bands you are talking about. Nice thing we had is that the whole band just came together. Never any ads placed to find other musicians. At times I think that is the best way for a good band to get together.

Before I moved here to AZ, I had a freind that played drums and we would jam every week or so. He was the religious type, but never judgemental. Turns out the youth minister at his church played guitar. He had him come over one night, and this dude was psycho on the guitar! Not what I expected from a youth minister! I decided to go with my buddy once on youth night when he told me they had built some skate ramps, and thought I would relive my youth a bit. Lo and behold here is the minister dressed in doc martens, black baggy pants, heavy ass wallet chain, black shirt, and the same spikey ass hair as the first time I met him. He did preach a bit, it was his job after all, but never once offended me. So yeah, there are some cool Christians out there, but I seem to attract the Bible thumpers.

With that said, I just responded to a Christian metal ad!

I keep thinking back to the second Spinal Tap movie where Derek Smalls recounts the time he played in the Christian band...lol

 

[cycosuicide]

Dude, it is very tough to find good people to work with. But if it means that much to you, keep practicing your craft, and be persistent. I am a firm believer that it does payoff. Another thought is for you to question yourself, "Am I doing everything possible to market myself, improve as a musician? Do I have other things to offer people besides playing just this one instrument?" You know, the more things you have to offer, the easier it is for you to get into music situations.

 

[Lord of Delusions]

Jeez, and all this time I thought my mediocre talent and average looks would take me anywhere I wanted to go! What a wakeup call! lol