"you know you're a viking if... "

[Dead_Lioness]

I am working full force on a huge project for school. I have to give a 30 minute speech about the heritage, and history of the vikibgs (with focus on Mythology and saga)

I already have every information I need, but I want to end it with
"you know you're a viking if"
kind of a funny endind. Sort of like the "you're a metal head if.."
and a list of funny things:
My brain can normally come up with funny things, but not when I'm all focused on the speech... please list funny things for me!!!

You're a viking if...................................



thanks in advance!!

 

[JBroll]

You may be a Viking if you go on a cruise and leave with more money than you had when you started.

Probably should pronounce the word as 'Wiking' like the silly English people in the documentaries - you'll probably need about half the content if the audience is cracking up half of the time.

Jeff

 

[WhiteBeastofWotan]

... if you like to rape and pillage.



Not so much a joke, just a fact.

 

[JBroll]

Yeah, wouldn't work as an endline seeing as how she's filling a half hour of presentation with Vikings raping and pillaging.

You know you're a Viking if you know the names of your weapons better than the names of the brides you've brought home as prizes of war.

Jeff

 

[Liverslapper]

you know you are a viking when your favorite band is Amon Amarth

 

[Dead_Lioness]

excellent, go on

 

[Dead_Lioness]

errr... come on, where is Nolordy... ?

 

[El Stormo]

You know you're a Viking when you keep getting blamed for rapes and decapitations even when you were nowhere near where it happened.

 

[fading]

"I am a Viking....... I'm going out to war.....I've got no fear in my mind..........."

 

[dreaming neon darkspot]

... if you're ID's on your belt buckle.



d'oh!


... well, that COULD work, too...
​

 

[Karmic]

when you are able to sleeprape

 

[EricT]

You know you're a viking if not even a bathtub full of Mead is enough...

 

[Dead_Lioness]

enough with the raping... there is more for the vikings than raping..
plus, it's not something I can say infront of my class and 3 professors...

 

[Karmic]

 

[Metal head87]

You know you're a Viking if you are offended by Hollywood depictions of Vikings.


You know you're a Viking if you think Rob Darken is gayer than the Village People.

 

[Liverslapper]

you know you're a viking if your teacher sent you to the school NORSE!

 

[Metal head87]

You know you're a Viking if a Bathory song (or Immortal's Beyond The North Waves) can make you cry.

You know you're a Viking if you can wear a loincloth in 0 degree weather.

 

[Dead_Lioness]

Kram

 

[JBroll]

enough with the raping... there is more for the vikings than raping..
plus, it's not something I can say infront of my class and 3 professors...

Bullshit, I've talked about raping in my classes, and my field doesn't even have anything to do with Vikings. What's the worst that could happen?

Jeff

 

[RedKef]

..if you're scandinavian.

sorry, folks, can't be a viking otherwise. I'm half viking, but I look full viking.