You're Invited!!!!!!!!!!!

@Hitori: yeah, i also think the little mermaid one is more appropriate. but maybe the prince should be changed with a werewolf? a hairy werewolf?

@Phyros: come on, you are obliged to attend. we won't have all the beer, the beautiful ladies and DT just for nothing. :D

@DL: now you know why you have to come. ;)
 
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Sure, Dafne, you can play the guitar, you should play the wedding song while we enter the church! :p
We don't say "i will" in greek weddings, but we can make a nice headbanging pit in the reception if you like. :D

@Human Desert: where the heck do you find all those shiny things? :p
 
Human Desert said:
Me and Lasse were never an online couple though. I know that's not the point of the list, but anyway i think most of the other relationships started online.

I don´t know about the others, but we weren´t together before we met. So that´s already 2 out of 6 "offline". Your statistics get dizzy unless you question them all ;)

And yeah, the point of the list was only to mention those of the DT-board who are a couple, regardless of at which point they became a couple.
 
fireangel said:
regardless of at which point they became a couple.
from my experience, it's hard anyway to define at what point exactly two people became a couple (normal relationships or not).
 
@Kov: thanks! will you regale us with your presence? we need to start arranging tables and such.
 
Siren said:
from my experience, it's hard anyway to define at what point exactly two people became a couple (normal relationships or not).
Really? I think before the first kiss it's hardly a relationship and afterwards there's usually a discussion about whether it's a relationship or whether it's just been "fun".. or how do you do it? :p
 
Angelbreeze: I said "those of my knowledge" (in the original post a page before..). Feel free to add whomever you know ;)
And also I left out the ex-es, I thought that would maybe not be nice for some people.



Siren said:
from my experience, it's hard anyway to define at what point exactly two people became a couple (normal relationships or not).

I have no idea. But I personally remember it pretty well :D
 
Taliesin said:
Really? I think before the first kiss it's hardly a relationship and afterwards there's usually a discussion about whether it's a relationship or whether it's just been "fun".. or how do you do it? :p

Well, sometimes it has been very clear when that point was crossed.
Other times, the emotional involvement, closeness and commitment was noticeable -even if silent- a long time before the first kiss or the verbal agreement of being a couple, and things progressed slowly, so it's not exactly clear when that transition happened. I do have vivid and fond memories, but who knows if it really happened at some point during the silent phase, during the first kiss, or after the verbal agreement? Can someone really tell me that? I, for one, don't know.

I also find the verbal agreement of being a couple a bit childish (even if necessary), because in my mind it's connected to high-school relationships with no real feeling. When strong feelings are involved, i think it's pretty obvious and i don't think discussions whether it was for fun or not are necessary. Of course discussions about the issue happen in order to clear out the situation and to see if the feelings are mutual and to decide how the couple will go on. But in my case kissing has never been just for fun, and the thought of someone telling me "it was just fun" makes me angry.


edit: it's not easy to express these things, so i hope it's at least a bit clear what i mean.
 
Uhh.. Ive just had a 4 hour man-to-man talk about a relation that's gone from very bright to very ugly in a matter of hours... needless to say Im quite drunk. :erk:
The only bright side is that it's not my relationship, lol ;)

Anyway.. what you describe as a "slow and silent progress of commitment" reminds me a lot more of what you call highschool relationships, because it seems to involve a lot more idealization instead of real love than a real relationship.
I dont think kissing someone "for fun" is assholish or condescending either, it's just a different approach, some people arent ready for real commitment. It's disappointing, but a valid way of behaviour, imho. That's why I said that with the kiss, the line between playing and the real thing is crossed.
Well.. I'll reread this thing tomorrow.. at some point.
 
Siren said:
Other times, the emotional involvement, closeness and commitment was noticeable -even if silent- a long time before the first kiss or the verbal agreement of being a couple, and things progressed slowly, so it's not exactly clear when that transition happened. I do have vivid and fond memories, but who knows if it really happened at some point during the silent phase, during the first kiss, or after the verbal agreement? Can someone really tell me that? I, for one, don't know.

Hmmm… I see your point, but I think you can easily pinpoint one or two specific moments in which you thought “hey is this something more than a regular friendship?” even if you later dismissed it with “nah, I’m imagining things”. Maybe you can’t be sure when it happened for the other person, but there IS a point in which you seriously considered it for the first time, be it because of a kiss or because the other person smiled a certain way or whatever. Of course commitment and closeness and involvement all develop slowly, but imo there is that one “magic moment” in which the point was crossed, at least mentally.

Siren said:
I also find the verbal agreement of being a couple a bit childish (even if necessary), because in my mind it's connected to high-school relationships with no real feeling. When strong feelings are involved, i think it's pretty obvious and i don't think discussions whether it was for fun or not are necessary.

Ah, you’re lucky then, and in that case I’ve met all the wrong people, or I’m just really bad at reading guys. I think the fact that someone even wants to have this conversation with you is the opposite from childish- it’s taking things out in the open, calling them by their name, and setting the rules for the game.

Or maybe it’s just a personal problem, but unless someone tells me “I like you. Seriously,” I think it’s all in my mind and get all paranoid. Maybe because sadly, most of the time when I think someone likes me, and that kissing or whatever meant something, it turns out it meant something completely different for the other person. All of this has reached a point in which I feel incredibly stupid and naïve for still thinking that kissing, making out, even sex, should mean something.

I guess what I’m trying to say is, it seems that your point is when things are unspoken, it’s because both persons are emotionally committed. What I’ve unfortunately found out by experience is that the norm is just the opposite- when things go unspoken, those unspoken things seems to be “this is just for fun.” It takes serious interest in the other person to be brave enough to be outspoken with your feelings. Even when I’m really interested, it’s impossible for me to open up.

Siren said:
But in my case kissing has never been just for fun, and the thought of someone telling me "it was just fun" makes me angry.

You mean most of the world isn’t like that? I must stop going to bars :p or move to Greece.

Taliesin said:
I dont think kissing someone "for fun" is assholish or condescending either, it's just a different approach, some people arent ready for real commitment. It's disappointing, but a valid way of behaviour, imho.

I think it is an assholish thing to do IF you let the other person get the wrong idea about what your intentions are. And well, the problem is most people don’t leave it at a kiss. And a lot of people lie about their intentions to get what they want- to the other person, and worst, to themselves.

… wow, I sound like I’m all traumatized or something :p
Can’t we just keep talking about the wedding? Can I be the maid of honour?
 
I think Hitori and I should get married. Or get together at least, if she doesn't believe in marriage. Or isn't gay. Erm :err:

It's quite hard for me to tell sometimes, when you spend a lot of time with someone and feelings develop and you wonder, "What? Him? No way..." And before you know it, you're having "the talk," which is necessary for me. It'd be great if everyone was so receptive and sensitive you didn't need to set things straight, but some people are just having fun so you must know if what they want is what you want.

Maybe because I'm female, I like to discuss things freely. My ex never talked about his feelings, which drove me nuts. He'd keep everything bottled up and explode for seemingly no reason out of the blue. Eh, I still hope to meet the right person, not at a bar, but from bumping into him around the street corner or something. Er. Not quite that way :p At this point though, I'm fed up with relationships.

Anyhoo, can I be the flower girl? :D
 
is that a formal proposal? :p
i am unfortunately not gay. but we should at least get together, sit in some rocking chairs, smoke in a pipe, have 20 cats around us, and get bitter together one of these days