Cheesy Peasy Thread

Dhatura

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Mar 19, 2003
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One of my colleagues came in the teacher's office today and said: "I'm in love with someone other than my boyfriend." First I laughed then I asked if she was kidding but she wasn't. She said she wants to live with her boyfriend, wants to give birth to his children but she's in love with this other guy and he doesn't even know about it.

I felt uneasy a bit and didn't know what to say to her. What do you think? Have you been in such a situation? What would you do? Or is it a deceit already? Somehow I feel I'd never be in a situation like this but that's a stupid thing to say of course (sometimes I feel my life is too simple, well, that's offtopic anyway but still, here I am sipping my hohes C vitamin orange and carrot drink and think life is fun and that I'll have no problems whatsoever).

Soooo? I mean what do you think?
 
auch

i was in such a situation. it ruined my life and made me leave my home, so hmmmm... ugh. exactly the thing you described, wow.
well, the biggest mistake in my life was that i didnt leave my boyfriend because i was too used to our life together and i couldn't even think of leaving him. i hurt the person i was in love with so much, now im still paying off for it, 2 years later...
and dhatura, i was thinking the same thing like you - this could never happen to me, i would never cheat on my boyfriend, NEVER. but when you're in love everything slips out of control.
i think she should leave him. but i guess it's easier said than done, everyone was telling me i should leave my bf... i just couldn't. and when i did it, it was too late.
 
i don't think this is 'typical women's stuff'.

i've been out yesterday with a dear (female) friend of mine. she lived together with her boy and now he dumped her and took the girl who was in love with him for a couple of months from his office.
but okay, besides thinking of 'what it is then' the months before the break up... he nevertheless did break up.
i don't know if what i would chose between 'just being with a man your comfortable with' and 'being single'... repeating myself: can you be 'the one of his dreams' for one... i don't think so. can i live with less... we'll see.
 
Allan said:
Wanting to have kids and live with someone if you're in love with someone else.

it's called habit. if you live 5 years with someone and think you will have his kids and marry him someday, it's pretty hard to let go of the idea.
 
who has the answer to that?
i haven't been in your situation... i dunno what i would do. would i have kids? would i be married? can i communicate with my man? what has he already experienced? do i feel too old for a new life? ... we live much longer these days, i see 90 year old grandfathers marrying with 70 year old 'youngsters', i see 20 year olds suffering because their boy has betrayed them and they don't want to leave him as magazines tell us you can grow over it anyhow... others are happy because they stayed with the boy and have a much deeper relationship now...

'we are so young/our lives have just begun...' :D
 
Allan said:
makes no sense to me to be comfortable with someone if you're in love with someone else. must be a male thing.

no, of course, you're not comfortable with your bf if you're cheating on him! i didn't mean that... i used to cry when we had sex... (revealing more loveless sex details....).
i meant that when you know someone so well and have spent every moment in the last 5 years with him, you feel SECURE with him, it's like a part of you, like the only person who really knows you. but this is so wrong...... so wrong.
 
yeh elisabeth, or the fact she's up for like a 'life-time" commitment, but yet itchy about it; falling in love, the rush, the excitement of playing.
i mean, the concept of deceit or adultory is in some kind of restrictions we bound the idea of love with.
it takes a lot of courage to step up to yerself and see why you fall in love with another guy while you're up for this big settling thing...

id say to her know that what you do with the guy is a choice or sth.

perhaps she could tell her bf, like open n honest, but suggest some time off to bunny about a bit :D if he's up for it.
last rounds, rienne va plus.

but if i were her guy, i'd feel [............this............] fucked :yell:
1:2 e-scale :)
 
relationships are starts with passion & love.. but it continues with:
respect, same hobbies, good communication btw partners, sex, social status..etc
sometimes,passion can fade away, but if those ones stay still relationships continues..
and you can feel passion for another man..
is it worth to let all those thing that I wrote, just for passion?
 
Dhatura said:
One of my colleagues came in the teacher's office today and said: "I'm in love with someone other than my boyfriend." First I laughed then I asked if she was kidding but she wasn't. She said she wants to live with her boyfriend, wants to give birth to his children but she's in love with this other guy and he doesn't even know about it.

I felt uneasy a bit and didn't know what to say to her. What do you think? Have you been in such a situation? What would you do? Or is it a deceit already? Somehow I feel I'd never be in a situation like this but that's a stupid thing to say of course (sometimes I feel my life is too simple, well, that's offtopic anyway but still, here I am sipping my hohes C vitamin orange and carrot drink and think life is fun and that I'll have no problems whatsoever).

Soooo? I mean what do you think?

To get to the point I think your friend knows which way she wants to go but is comfortable where she is and it is, after all, horrible breaking up a relationship. I think if she harbours any feelings of love for her current partner she should do the decent thing and make up her mind to either stay with him or to call it a day and not prolong the situation further. The longer it goes on the more hurtful it will be for her partner. This in love with two men thing, it will obviously be different kinds of feelings. New love being all exciting and perhaps the forbidden element is exciting too?
 
how the hell can you be in love with guy a and want to have the kids of guy b? thats just nuts.

hopefuly this new guy is just a phase. if not... :erk:
 
You men speak as if you had never heard of men cheating on their wives, haha.

To make it a bit clearer, it's not a relationship with the new guy, he doesn't even know (the boyfriend doesn't know either of course), I think it's some infatuation, I don't think she wants to cheat on BF anyway, but I don't know.

I don't care about it this morning, hehe *hohes C happy mood*

I've also been dumped for the same reason but that still doesn't entitle me to behave in the same way. If someone's dedicated enough to be with me, I respect that a lot :D