dear susie column

toolsofthetrade said:
Dear Susie,
the other day i met this girl. she's extremely pretty (as you are) and sweet and that - my kinda girl eh :D
now i've joined this band, and the drummer is her mate. and fancies her. he lives in her place cos he's in between houses for another 2 weeks.

i wanna get closer to her, but so does he. and he lives right beside her, i live 70 miles down south, ffs.
she said she fancies blokes not bald, not long haired, kinda like my hairstyle, basically in between. he's got long hair, i'm growing mine.

she could be the golden bunny; what can i do? :yell:
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RIGHT, it pays off to have abit of space between you , so what i suggest is that you dont try all this platonic shite, and when you next see her well ,say what my man did ,with sheer love in his eyes ( do you wanna portion or not) and then let her make her own mind up, if that aint respect nothing is, no seriously now , she,ll get bored of the guy in her face, and no one loves a tryer believe me :)
 
Achernar said:
Dear Susie.

I've been reading your column lately. The dawg shown below is my new dawg. My sixth dog to be more precise. She arrived here out of nowhere and we decided to keep her close to our other dogs cuz she was kinda cute. Well, the problem is, that whenever I play proper doom or some old-school death-metal, the bites every single moving beings in my house's perimeter. This is becoming quite annoying since I like listening to this kind of music every now and then and that is costing me a lot of bandages, and I don't think I can afford them anymore.
But then again...I don't wanna let her go..i mean...she has the spirit...she invented a whole new concept between my dawgz...the "bitepit"...she's a pioneer I guess...i want her!

What can I do my dear dead dear dear dear DEAR dear Susie? :( This is driving me mad FFS.

pikymetalhead.jpg
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you have what you call the rock bitch of dogs (let her rock in a seperate room) so that you can enjoy some time with friends, but if you let her carry on ripping limbs , it will be your friends who will have the say wether she stays or goes mmmm yes thats my advise :wave: p.s give her meat while playing music :D
 
Dear Susie,
last week-end I was dating a girl I met a few weeks ago.:)
We went to the restaurant and to the bar and all, and it went very well. But when it came to most serious stuff, crucial moment, she told me that she was already involved with a guy far older than her, and that the guy wasn't really decided if he wanted to stay with her or not.
So she told me that she could not go with me for the moment because she is still thinking about the other guy and I don't know what to do, because if I wait, I think that the situation will go shit for me and I will definitively lose her.
What should I do:
1 - Call her and say that she MUST leave the other one
2 - Stop worrying about her and let her with her stupid story
3 - Stop worrying about her and tell her to go fuck herself

Thanks Susie
 
Nicolas said:
Dear Susie,
last week-end I was dating a girl I met a few weeks ago.:)
We went to the restaurant and to the bar and all, and it went very well. But when it came to most serious stuff, crucial moment, she told me that she was already involved with a guy far older than her, and that the guy wasn't really decided if he wanted to stay with her or not.
So she told me that she could not go with me for the moment because she is still thinking about the other guy and I don't know what to do, because if I wait, I think that the situation will go shit for me and I will definitively lose her.
What should I do:
1 - Call her and say that she MUST leave the other one
2 - Stop worrying about her and let her with her stupid story
3 - Stop worrying about her and tell her to go fuck herself

Thanks Susie
Click to expand...

right, well my advise to you would be , number three , now the reason for this is a girl, dosent like the thought of you not bein interested in her, which will make her want you all the more, try it and let me no, another word of advise , give her a large cucumber when you tell her to go fuck herself, that is true rejection :D
 
Susie said:
she must be happy cos of my extremely mature advise :wave:
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Sure. Can't you see she's smiling on the pic? She already knew I was seeking your mature and kind advice. Thank you again Susie. She's enjoying her new room. I'm actually playing her some soft music now to check out her reaction...
 
Susie said:
whats the problem, it gives you sterio sound for a porno, most people pay five pounds for a good tape and your getting it free , why not try joining in the fun ask they wont mind. :)
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Thanks for the advice I guess, but I'm not a pervert or any of that. I don't fancy being anywhere near another man's erection either.
 
Susie said:
1 RIGHT unfortunatly you got to go to school :loco: so get it sorted then you can rock your socks off

2 theres nothing you can do but be proud of what you done , hold your head high because you will have lots more nights like this :)
3 right your fifteen your old enough to realise what you want so dont let people take the piss, now get to school, and do as your told :D
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Wow... I'll give you feedback within 6 months, how's that?
 
Ol' Dirty Bastard said:
Thanks for the advice I guess, but I'm not a pervert or any of that. I don't fancy being anywhere near another man's erection either.
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well all i can recommend is that you get your woman(if you have one) and bone her twice as loud till it irratates your friend :) if you dont have a girl,then immitate that you got one there that will soon make them quiet :tickled:
 
Frodnat said:
fuss2.jpg


Please help. I don´t know what do? My feet, look at them...
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there a great pair of feet, i even had to count the toes, now listen the only help and advise i can give to you is, try to get a good friend a close friend, and give him or her an axe to chop those fuckin blinders clean off hhaa :tickled:
 
Susie said:
there a great pair of feet, i even had to count the toes, now listen the only help and advise i can give to you is, try to get a good friend a close friend, and give him or her an axe to chop those fuckin blinders clean off hhaa :tickled:
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This will hurt...o_O Isn´t there another way to get rid of them, maybe I should get other feet from anywhere. A life without... nooooooooooooooooo:ill:
 
Dear Susie,
I know a lot of men wear these low slung pants, which shows quite a lot of bum off? I can't stop thinking about them for hours afterwards.....
Is this questionable behaviour?
 
Dear Susie , I have a problem. My girlfriend always fucks off after I cook fucking top nosh scrans for her and she leaves me to do all the dishes. What can I do?
 
Su Jacko said:
Dear Susie,
I know a lot of men wear these low slung pants, which shows quite a lot of bum off? I can't stop thinking about them for hours afterwards.....
Is this questionable behaviour?
Click to expand...

no this is perfectly normal, those low slung pants are made for you to think of hours later, and to help you towards a sly flick later on through the day, so never question yourself ok :)
 
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