okay, God saved me from the evil, evil hangover therefore I'm sort of ok, both physically and psychologically. today I will just dick around, do some shopping, read a book, and sleep. But first I will tell you my v. interesting story.
last night i finished my training and went for drinks with some classmates. the guy i sort of liked was not out with us for reasons unclear to me, then he called and asked me out for dinner. since i had to go to a gig next to where his house is i said yes, and i was suddenly faced with the stupidest bunch of things i have heard in a while. in around two hours, he managed to tell me more or less this:
a) I am an interesting and likeable woman, but men need hardons to fall in love, therefore i should consider going around in miniskirts and makeup to get them
b) since I am already hampered in my quest for mr. right by having a strong personality, if i don't comply with a) i will never find a man
c) I am a fundamentalist AND a hypocrite (huh?) when it comes to sex, since I had some but never went all the way b/c of my personal ethics. since some girls consider 69 heavier than making love, i should realize it is, stop being both fundamentalist and hypocrite, and sleep with him or anyone else for that matters
d) given what was said in b), if i add c) i lower even more my chances of finding a guy
e) it would be a problem anyway since silly women make love better than smart ones. silly women give themselves freely while brilliant ones are mechanic calculators (?)
f) on the other hand, not doing it would be an even bigger problem: if he goes out with me and we don't fuck as soon as possible, in his mind the idea of fucking will be connected to his ex and this is ugly and unfair
g) the fact that i didn't ever mention ONCE my intention to go out with him (i didn't mention it cos it's nonexistant, i might have liked him a bit but i had no plans) is not relevant to the previous points
h) besides being a fundamentalist and a hypocrite, i'm also somehow disgusting because i get the occasional crush (and, take heed, go no further: fundamentalist? hypocrite?) on a married guy
j) the fact that i consider sort of cheesy discussing sex all the time while on a first date is a confirmation of my FHD nature
k) anyway the seduction+lies+misrepresentation of self part is the best you get in a relationship.
i was so sure that in my new environment i wouldn't find this kind of guy anymore that i was about to beat him up to make him pay for all the deception and the cold-shower effect, but after all, although all this bad stuff above, i am civilized. figures.
h