Maiden-ish Christmas Songs

[Lord of Delusions]

So I remember a while back we did a little thread where you would take a Maiden song and reword the title to make a bit more Thanksgivingee. Why don't we do it again for Christmas.

Don't quite understand what I'm talking about? Here's an example: "Flight of Icarus" becomes "Flight of St.Nicolas"

Bonus points if you can actually reword the entire song.

 

[Downshifter]

ok

here is my first attempt

Set to the tune of

Running Free



Shopping Spree


Just sixteen, a Delivery truck, lots of shopping, for my buck.
I've got no money, I need a loan, smoke some grass, and off I go.

A Shopping Spree yeah, A Shopping Spree.
A Shopping Spree yeah, A Shopping Spree.

Spent the night looking through the mail, for a check to no avail.
Instant Credit Dawned on me, I'm running wild, A Shopping Spree.

Pulled into my next stop, near the whiskey, The Guitar shop.
Now all these axes, so many to see, Ill take just one, That Flying V.

 

[Lord of Delusions]

 

[Puckfiend]

This was written by a kid in a sweatshop somewhere near the North Pole:


Wreathchild:

Working in a shop, owned by my pop, decent pay I'm never given.
Hours are long, so I wrote this song about this hell I'm livin'

Now I'm spending my days weaving twigs around
a bunch of wire and berries found on the ground
Until I bind them, I'll never gonna stop sweating
Til all of these f**king wreaths are bound.

Cause I'm a Wreathchild
Well I'm a Wreathchild
Oh I'm a Wreathchild

Slaving away for the holiday..oooh, yeah..

You say it doesn't matter that I'm madder than a hatter, or working 24/7.
I know I've gotta break out or rub my dad out or I know I'll just go crazy..

Now I'm spending my days weaving twigs around
a bunch of wire and berries found on the ground
Until I bind them, I'll never gonna stop sweating
Til all of these f**king wreaths are bound.

Cause I'm a Wreathchild
Well I'm a Wreathchild
Yeah I'm a Wreathchild

Planning to kill you..this holiday..oooh, yeah..

 

[Archmagician]

LMAO You guys are fucking clever!!!

 

[Doodoobubbachuck]

Thanks for the 's! I think this has put me in the spirit of the holidayz!

 

[Lord of Delusions]

Flight of St. Nicolas


As the stars shine above his head
An old man stands in the sled
As the the ground pales to the first flakes of night
An elf's cry shatters the still

His eyes are ablaze
See the snowman in his gaze

Fly, on your way, like a reindeer
Fly as high as the clouds
On your way, like a reindeer
Fly, 'cross the night

Now the clouds break and a young deer appears
Looks the old man in the eye
As his nose glows he shouts at the crowd
In the name of St. Nicolas we'll fly

His nose now ablaze
As he flies with the jingle of his bells
Now they know that Christmas is saved
Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night

Fly, on your way, like a reindeer
Fly as high as the clouds
On your way, like a reindeer
Fly, 'cross the sky

 

[darthrya]

You guys have way too much time on your hands.

 

[metal maiden187]

ill give it a shot. this is hallowed be thy name


im waiting in a cold line when the door begins to open,reflecting on my kids christmas list and i dont have much time cause at 5:00 they are all sold out of playstations. the line it seems is getting low.
when the dad of my children come to read me bobbys list i relize i have to take a pi**in the stall on frst right and i know this is gonna go terriably wrong for me.
can it be that their is some sort of error i dont understand this jibberish is this how they teach kids to write in school today.
somebody please tell me that hes kidding its not easy to stop from screaming but the words escape me when i see the price. tears will flow from my sons eyes but why he can have the xbox360
as i march out of the store i see a guy with a playstation3 i snatch it from his arm but if im not a theift why did i snitch his gift?
as christmas eve night rolls around and their isnt much time fetch the wrapping paper cause im willing to wrap the presents.
mark my words son this gift wasnt easy to get please dont worry they wont find out i stole it.
when the cops come to arrest you maybe you will begin to understand that you dont pull out a gun on them.
cause then your kids will say hallowed be thy name without you.

sry guys i tried i hope sombody gets a stupid kick out of it

 

[spideyjg]

somebody please tell me that hes kidding its not easy to stop from screaming but the words escape me when i see the price.

That is damn fine writing.

Jim

 

[metal maiden187]

thanks dude

 

[Doodoobubbachuck]

These are fun! Keep em coming!

 

[metal maiden187]

to bad christmas is over so we cant see any more of these

 

[Lord of Delusions]

to bad christmas is over so we cant see any more of these

Says who?

 

[MattDouglas]

Exactly, LOD, says who?

As a matter of fact, upon seeing this thread a few days ago, I got some inspiration (if inspiration is really accurate to describe the process by which this product came, given what it is).

Lying in bed later that night, I realized that from what I knew of the lyrics to "We three kings", it would likely fit to the tune of "The Trooper". Upon looking up the full "We three kings" lyrics online, I realized I had a perfect fit. And last night, I went out to karaoke and actually performed my "hybrid creation" (Granted, I didn't know the 3kings lyrics full well so I had to stand them up beside the karaoke monitor). But it worked.

Better yet, the guy who hosts there on Thurs and Sat nights, video tapes the show and will put segments of it up on youtube. So with the Maidens' permission, I'll be happy to post a link to it when he puts it up on youtube (although that could be a week or three). Granted, it was recorded with a home-use digital camcorder, so don't exact studio level sound quality.

Happy Irons New Year Everyone!!!!