So I think I am now at peace with the break up with the ex. Not that I don't still care for her deeply (I think she'll always be important to me) but I am basically at peace with the idea of not being with her. The idea of it doesn't put a knot in my stomach anymore. I think it was the trip to Spain that did something to my mind, something along the lines of other women exist and they will pay attention to me. I'm usually really insecure about that kind of stuff. I think the older you get, the better you're able to handle break ups. It's just a psychological mechanism that you develop out of necessity.
In other news, I made a profile on okcupid. I'm not really serious about it, I think it's kind of funny, and I don't actually see myself dating anybody in the near future. I'm just experimenting with it to see if I have some kind of game on this online crap. I've heard horror stories about how the response rate is so low, blah blah blah, whatever. Well I've only been on there two days, I've contacted a total of like 4 chicks and I now have some cute Asian chick messaging me. I think that's reasonable success considering the odds. I doubt that will amount to anything though and I don't really care.
I might actually be sort of content with my life right now. At least it's fairly stable in an emotional sense. What a relief.
edit: Also, so many of the women in Spain are drop-dead gorgeous and it seems like almost all of them are in shape. My God, what a country.
Dude, that is fantastic. Good job.