say something about ... yourself!

A day with Grandpa
Venice is getting too old
I'm no tourist guide

Spot the odd one out
It's so fucking easy that
It makes me giggle

College girls are hot
But like carbon copies they
fail to be unique

High school girls annoy
To the point of wishing death
Would rain upon them

No black people here
Wondering why they don't come
Maybe lack of bling

You old fart, why don't
you ever listen to me?
Heart attack not fun
 
when i went to europe, people were constantly walking up to me and talking to me in whatever crazy language applied to the country i was in. so i guess i should feel cool for not being an 'obvious obnoxious american tourist jerk' , cause i definitely saw some while i was there haha. mostly middle-aged southernish accented female types.
 
I saw a couple of "I'm from North Carolina and I won this trip at my local beer joint raffle" women there today, but only like two or three. I've also realized that the number of fat chicks (from all nations) in Venice is typically much, much lower than the number of them in other tourist spots around here...probably due to the fact that your only option in Venice is walking or boating and the paths are very narrow between the buildings. For some of the morbidly obese, that means getting stuck in the alleyways and capsizing boats.

I can pretty much see them saying, "I have to walk EVERYWHERE?!?! Fuck the birthplace of Vivaldi, Piazza San Marco, and The Accademia. Let's go to Vegas instead!"

The Russian chicks are so hot, though.

In all honesty, though, Venice is my least favorite place in all of Italy...maybe even Europe. I dread going there every time. Overpriced everything, overcrowding everywhere, food compared to other places is meh at best due to the fact that most of the patrons just don't know any better, and Veneziani aren't the warmest of people, nor the most honest.

I'm reminded of the Griswold European family vacation scene in Paris where the guy insults Clark to his face in French then warms up a bunch of microwave dinners and puts it on a plate.
 
Dead Winter said:
For some of the morbidly obese, that means getting stuck in the alleyways and capsizing boats.
Click to expand...
hahaha seriously, that city has to have the highest ratio of strange narrow twisting alleys of anywhere ive been (which isnt all that many places i guess). we just kinda wandered around and found all kinds of strange little courtyards and twisting passages that were mostly deserted. weird place, awesome though.
 
Poland too. Went there a few years ago for NATO Air Meet...walked through downtown Poznan and thought there was some runway fashion model show in town at the same time.

They love Americans, too, and love to fuck.
 
neal said:
hahaha seriously, that city has to have the highest ratio of strange narrow twisting alleys of anywhere ive been (which isnt all that many places i guess). we just kinda wandered around and found all kinds of strange little courtyards and twisting passages that were mostly deserted. weird place, awesome though.
Click to expand...

See, to enjoy Venice the first time you go there, you have to have an attitude like yours. Just walk in any direction and check out all the weird shit that's been there for who knows how long. Eventually you'll make it to the piazza because everywhere you go there is a sign that reads:

<----PER LA PIAZZA S. MARCO---->

No matter where you go, you'll end up in the same place.

Just wander off and stuff. It may get old after you've been there for the tenth time, but doing what you did is perfect. I bet you had fun. It's pretty much a free-for-all because no one gives a shit what you do. There is so much human traffic there that it's virtually impossible to control anyone.
 
One more thing...I like playing mind games with the Italians there.

I'm American; I dress like the average American with blue jeans or knee-length cargo shorts, white socks, sometimes baseball cap, etc. and I carry myself much like most American guys do. However, I speak fluent Italian so I like to catch them trying to fuck with me when I start to speak in English and then watch the entire situation change when I start rattling off in Italian when I know they're bullshitting me. The mood and attitude changes considerably.
 
Polish, Czech and Slovakian girls are ridiculously hot and surprisingly easy. I recommend visiting.

Chris, I agree with just about everything you've said over the past two pages.
 
Endorphins ist krieg.

Since I gave up trying to go against my body type and bulk up and just tone I've been doing so much better. I think in a month or two I can be one of those obnoxious cunts that walks around with no shirt on.
 
I have no more internet at home. I cancelled it. I was initially just going to cancel my cable but then I decided I use the internet enough at work as it is. I never watched TV much and the internet is reaching an all time high level of complete boredom for me, so I'm going to save the money. We'll see how long I can last before I order internet again. The TV is gone for good though.
 
i just came back from the Graspop Metal Meeting in Belgium... damn i had an awesome time over there Jupiler beer and fucking nice weather all weekend

best band that played was Gojira, fucking awesome show they gave.

but i had most fun with Volbeat :p i was so drunk that i puked in the pit xD

well i must say it isnt by far one of the best festivals in europe but its just close to my home and we went with lots of friends
 
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