Social Hermits

[Fox Mulder]

How many of you practice/study audio engineering all day long at home, hardly leaving the house except for weekends (in rare cases)?

I'm one of them. I study/practice audio engineering, guitar playing, song writing, C++, music theory, nutrition and fitness all the time. I'm also doing a Graduate Diploma in Marketing. As for my social life - I hang out with my friends every other 2 weeks or so during weekends.

I meet different people 1-2 times a week, don't talk much. They come, record, leave, and I give them a shitty output, but they call me GOD because I live in Bangladesh.

It's kind of getting over my head and I'm on Xanax SR. Un-prescribed, but well-researched. Who needs med school when you got google?

Edit: And I think my girlfriend's loosing interest in me because of my lifestyle. She's the fun-loving type. Loves metal, loves what I do. But she wants to spend time with me everyday, which I can't.


---------------------------------------------

Is there anybody out there? *Pink Floyd*

 

[Joel4662]

This is me, plus I work a full time job, go to college, and minus the girlfriend part
I figure I'll have free time when I'm an old dude.

 

[tempe]

Trust me as someone who's been doing this full time for well only 6 months but I learned REALLY quickly to make time. Treat it like a 9-5 job if at all possible, take afternoons and evening to yourself. Balance is incredibly important. I'm aware that there is going to be really long days every now and then but you really have to find some time for yourself!

 

[ArnaudM]

Take care, dude. Living this way will burn you out. Three years of anti-depressive cure for me.
Take some rest, have a beer, see friends : your job will be better, you'll be more efficient and life will seem cool again.

 

[John_C]

I would say "If you're happy as a semi-loner then maybe that's how you should be"

but

you're obviously not happy, you're taking xanax to cover it over and you might well lose your girlfriend. You need to get outside more!

 

[vespiz]

Yeah, that sounds familiar (-girlfriend). Although I meet lots of people everyday at the job, mostly it's not that social ("Pack of D'Addario 10-46" "xx euro" "Kthxbye").
I've been trying to take it easier and some time for myself, but then I end up feeling bad for not doing anything! Talk about a workaholic..

 

[Morgan C]

 

[-Noodles-]

I'm strangely lucky that to get to University, I have to take an hour's train journey which passed through the city.

It means that from the studio to work I have optimal chances to go for coffee or a beer with people.. Plus I always make sure that I take a day off a week. Usually it's a Monday!

 

[MarcusGHedwig]

Godammit Morgan

 

[Star Ark]

I'm like the OP

Used to be outgoing, but now at 27 I'm bored of hanging out and talking shit with people

Fuck, I hate talking to women, all I wanna do is screw and go back to my shed to "tinker" like my old man used to

 

[Audiosprite]

i'm just like the op, minus the girlfriend, the xanax, the recording gigs, and i mostly put off studying and waste time on the internet instead. so nothing like the op.

 

[ze kink]

Not really, but I could've turned into one had I not realized at age ~15 that it's not good to just sit at home all the time and play guitar, trying to become the next Yngwie or something. My social skills were withering.

Actually, I think the most useful things I've ever learned considering music as work instead of just fun have been social skills, not how to use a compressor or how to edit drums to be tight. I've gotten through sessions which could've turned into band members kicking each other's asses, made band members change their minds when they've originally stubbornly wanted to do things in a way that would've resulted in the end result being worse, gotten good takes out of singers with really bad days, and even got a band feeling great about their gig that they played for an empty venue once.

That, and I think I actually understand how chicks work

PS. just to add, all this even though I'm quite introverted. It does not bother me at all that I'm better at focusing at a single person at a time, instead of socializing with people as groups rather than individuals.

 

[Chryst Krispies]

This is my life.

I have poor social skills. Fuck it. It's kinda late now. I sit at home and fuck with a metronome.

 

[jipchen]

i'm just like the op, minus the girlfriend, the xanax, the recording gigs, and i mostly put off studying and waste time on the internet instead. so nothing like the op.

 

[muckypup1]

I spend all my time in doors, recording and mixing music, and listening to music. the only days i go out to hang with mates are usually saturdays, maybe thursdays if theres a gig going on, but thats rare. I have no girlfriend and probably wont do for a long time because i dont really like going out to party, i just like chilling and sometimes going out to get absolutely shitfaced and stoned.

So you could call me a semi-hermit, i dont like people really lol

 

[MindMunch]

I think you should leave being old to when you actually get old.

ps: I don´t think you should be using ********** unless a professional told you so. And even then...

*edit*
Wow! Can you believe that the "generic" name of Xanax is censored on this board?

 

[HandsOfDespair]

I spend all my time in doors, recording and mixing music, and listening to music. the only days i go out to hang with mates are usually saturdays, maybe thursdays if theres a gig going on, but thats rare. I have no girlfriend and probably wont do for a long time because i dont really like going out to party, i just like chilling and sometimes going out to get absolutely shitfaced and stoned.

So you could call me a semi-hermit, i dont like people really lol

I'm completely like you. These days I'm ALWAYS working. I spend 25 hours a work working in a grocery store to pay the bills, and the rest of the time I'll be recording bands to buy new gear, or working on my Hands of despair album. I hang out max 1 time a week, sometimes every other week. I just don't like going to bars and drink that much, I get bored easily, and I prefer to work on music. I'm totally broke anyway so even if I'd like to hang out and get drunk each night I just couldn't .

 

[MarkG]

I used to be that way, but it changed with playing live (and going out drinking after). That led to me getting a girlfriend, being active together, her moving in with me, etc. etc. There's more to life than a desk/video games/what have you

 

[abigor731]

i think i've been there myself, although everyones different of course
never leaving the house and not speaking for days is not necessairily a problem, but if you're feeling that its kinda getting over your head the first thing you could try is getting a break from your usual daily life, i dunno maybe go on holiday somewhere? sounds like you could use some vacation
i know its easier said than done, and if you just can't because of university or something you can also just stop playing guitar for a week or so, it helps putting things into perspective if you feel kind of "stagnating"

but if getting a break doesn't help and it just doesn't go away, try to recognize the point where its better to really go to a psychotherapist, if you don't know where to start just go to a regular doctor and ask him/her
if you really have some of the regular indications of the xanax like, i dunno, sleep disturbances or panic attacks or something, i'd already go honestly
there are also studies that indicate that on average, psychotherapy is financially more efficient than just medication

 

[kvoid]

I'm really surprised so many of you are easily willing to prescribe yourself controlled anti-depressants!

When I was dumb and young and tried every drug I could get my hands on, that stuff scared me shitless! (any prescription psychoactives with long term effects for that matter)

Buddy go out to some scenic area and smoke a bowl, hang out with friends. Life is not staring into a screen as many have already said. I had a six month slump where I had no job and went out twice. I was inches close to a)blowing my brains out or b) selling off everything and going backpacking through Asia. The second time I went out, I saw a friend and got the job I now have.

I see a lot of people that suck at social skills and it really fucks with their job duties and consequently their career as a whole. If you can't communicate with people, you're no good to the workforce at any higher level.