The 10 Rules To Relationships by Xanina and jmbullet

[jmbullet]

Sorry guys !

Rule #1: Your ex-boyfriend is always wrong.
Rule #2: Even when your ex boyfriend is right, he is still wrong.
Rule #3: Even when he tries to be nice, your ex boyfriend is an asshole.
Rule #4: Men are stupid.
Rule #5: Men always think with their other heads, never with their brains.
Rule #6: Never leave your boyfriend alone with your sister or your best friend.
Rule #7: It will ALWAYS end badly.
Rule #8: Women are always right, especially Allie and Marie.
Rule #9: When in doubt men, you are ALWAYS epic failures.
Rule #10: Women should keep men locked in the closet and only use them for sex, cuddles and babies.

 

[Corny]

Lol @ kids who just discovered new hair down there

Sorry, I know that was mean.

 

[antiface]

Perhaps jmbullet should change her name to Miss Andry?

 

[bobvex]

THE UNDERSIGNED, AGREE THAT…

1. In the unlikely event of my not having an orgasm after you’ve drunkenly
> rolled on top of me and pumped away for five minutes, wheezing like an old
> man with emphysema, I shall politely fake one. And it’ll be a really good
> act too, with me saying stuff like “Invaginate me Donkey Man!” and
> howling like a cat that’s being repeatedly jabbed with a compass.

2. Should your mother call, I will not complain that you are a fat slob,
> but rather uphold the illusion that you are a sophisticated, high earning,
> clean, considerate and sexually generous modern man

3. I fully understand that a woman’s main role in any relationship is to
> take blame, provide daily solace and generally gratify. In the event of
> any household or other problems or accidents, I agree that - by some complex scientific equation incomprehensible to woman - it will be my fault. Even if I wasn’t there.

4. Whenever my friends and I get together for a girlie chat, I will tell
> them that you are better hung than John Holmes.

5. And I will also mention this to YOUR friends conspiratorially e.g. “I
> can hardly walk! Could his last girlfriend get it all in? I am worried I
> may be too tight for his massiveness”.

6. After sex, I will expect to be stroked to sleep.

7. I will never, ever give your penis a “cute” nickname. I will refer to
> it respectfully as “sir” or “master”, but mostly I will know it as
> “ummmmslurpummmm”.

8. In bed, I will be as keen as mustard to try any novel sexual position
> you fancy. Especially ones where I do all the work and you just lie there,
> grinning.

Xanina and jmbullet




sweeeeeet....

 

[OvSeth]

 

[Big Boss]

1.- According to Freud a fetish for a woman is one means by which she can
deny she's lacking a dick.

And it may continue...

 

[bobvex]

The two absolutes in life, you people will learn this as you get older, wiser, and more crass.

Men, all of them, are fucking stupid. There are no exceptions.

Women, all of them, are completely nuts. There are no exceptions.

 

[xanina]

I must agree, perhaps bob and I just know better because we are older

 

[Big Boss]

Everybody changes a lot in only 3 years, I can say right now " see as I'll outstripe myself in 3 years "

 

[bobvex]

I must agree, perhaps bob and I just know better because we are older

Indeed. You go through life and you realize these things. You find a good balance of everything, marry them, because that's the one.

 

[Bodominarvoitus]

Sorry girls !

Rule #1: Your ex-girlfriend is always wrong.
Rule #2: Even when your ex-girlfriend is right, she is still wrong.
Rule #3: Even when she tries to be nice, your ex-girlfriend is an asshole.
Rule #4: Women are stupid.
Rule #5: Women always think with their clitoris, never with their brains.
Rule #6: Never leave your girlfriend alone with your brother or your best friend.
Rule #7: It will ALWAYS end badly.
Rule #8: Men are always right, especially Al and Mark.
Rule #9: When in doubt women, you are ALWAYS epic failures.
Rule #10: Men should keep women locked in the closet and only use them for vaginal sex, anal sex and oral sex.

Not bad, jmbullet. Not bad at all.

 

[Corny]

I must agree, perhaps bob and I just know better because we are older

What is your birthdate?

 

[OvSeth]

She's the same age as you are.

 

[Big Boss]

What is your birthdate?

Are you 24 or 23 ?

 

[xanina]

i am 23

 

[CrazyChris576]

I agree with everything contained in the originating post of this thread. Mostly because I am bound to agreement under punishment of death by the hands of Allie and Marie.

 

[jmbullet]

I agree with everything contained in the originating post of this thread. Mostly because I am bound to agreement under punishment of death by the hands of Allie and Marie.

Good boy !

 

[Nikki]

I agree with everything contained in the originating post of this thread. Mostly because I am bound to agreement under punishment of death by the hands of Allie and Marie.

*crack whip*

 

[CrazyChris576]

*crack whip*

Yeaaaaaaaaaah, that about covers it, although I'm in that situation more by choice than by force.....

 

[jmbullet]

he said Allie and Marie, he didn't mention Nikki *takes whip from Nikki's hands*