Another fucking story thread!

[maiden1]

....Well PEOPLES its been a couple of days now and Rays still on the turps, I can't hang around and wait for something to happen I need to find the path that will take me to the next Town or Village.
I need to find a Hotel/Motel and rest as we've been walking for days, there is no F*CKING WAY I'll be sleeping on the Moores tonight...PEOPLES Tizz said that when walking the Moore at night be ware of the MOON. Tizz written, when the moon is full beware of the Black Wolf as it shall become a Werewolf and once bitten by a Werewolf you to will become a Werewolf or you will become the living dead.
To stop the curse of the Werewolf you must take the life of the Werewolf that bites you.

So I leave a note for Ray it says, Ray If you are reading this note then you must still be alive and that means you still have time. I have gone on to find the next Town or Village, I have cut an arrow in the grass this is the direction I have gone, and Ray beware of the Wolf, If you see one shoot the F*cker.

Talk soon

Rodders.

 

[Lady__Stardust]

oh noes where have I gone!

 

[mutantllama]

I was lost.

 

[maiden1]

....But not yet found, Ray still has time to make it to the next Town or Village, but Ray must realise that its not safe on the Moores wen Tizz full moon. I just hope Ray has some Silver bullets with him as that would surly kill a Werewolf...me thinks

 

[maiden1]

...Anyway peoples I'm back on the right path to the next Village or Town, I see lights in the distance I'm thinking about 10-15 miles away I hope its not as F*CKED up like the last VILLAGE, only time will tell PEOPLES only time will tell.....:zombie:

So I start walking.......

 

[maiden1]

....I start walking down the path when I hear this all mighty scream, Wot The F*ck was that all about? but more to the point who the F*CK is that?

I start running, PEOPLES I feel like someone or something is right behind me, but I don't wont to stop running and have a look just in case I'm right about this feeling, so I run till I can run no more, I get to the point where my legs can take me no more and collapse beneath me.

I see a sign on the side of the path it says 10 miles to B&ND%YE>IL@*&%E WOT SORT OF F*CKING NAME IS THAT? So I keep walking till I......

 

[maiden1]

...Till I reach the next sign, I get to the sign its telling me I have 5miles to go...BUT...I must cross A bridge with no name...WTF...

So I head on down the road looking for this bridge with no name.

Who would build A bridge and not name it, some strange shit going down around here......its me....wot did the CLANSMAN put in our drinks? As you know PEOPLES i drank Rays drink as well as my own, so wot ever it was I had twice the dose.....

It...

 

[FenriR]

...chestnutted.

 

[Mythos Inibri]

he was too drunk as he walked the path.Suddenly there was a loud buzzing noise and a small swarmish cloud arose from the ground startling him.as he looked down,there lying directly in front of him in the middle of the path was a large piece of shit.the startling noise he realised was a bunch of flies startled by his approach.they seemed to be eating the turd.he pondered this while walking around the turd to continue his journey.the experience seemed to snap him out of his drunken stupor,if only momentarily

 

[maiden1]

....But now I am far from the shit I still have this buzzzzzzing sound in my ears, but why, WHY DO I STILL HEAR THIS F*CKING BUZZING NOISE?...I turn around and FARKME..it was the flies they weren't eating the shit...NO PEOPLES...They were collecting the shit....there fly bombers......

I started to run but they're still on my back, I run till I can run no more...SO I STOP..HAMMER TIME.....The flies they start bombing me with their shit...I'm standing still but not one piece of shit hits me...WAIT this must of been wot Ray was talking to me about, Ray warned me about some shit fighters...So now I know who and wot the shit fighters are.....

So now I can carry on my journey.......

 

[Lady__Stardust]

:O you shouldve done the hammer dance to dodge them!

 

[maiden1]

...I did do the hammer dance:danceboy: and I nailed it........And may I say your looking lovely tonight Charley.

I am walking down the path when I come up to a bridge, on the other side of this bridge was a bloody big fat hairy STINKY TROLL.

:zombie:STOP WHO GOES THERE?...Said the bloody big fat hairy stinky troll.

uuuuuuum could I cross your bridge pleeeeeas..

:zombie:YOU MAY CROSS MY BRIDGE...IF YOU CAN TELL ME THE NAME OF MY BRIDGE

OK...you freak of nature......Is it.........RUMPLESTILSKIN.....

:zombie:NO....:zombieOSE IT LOOK LIKE A NURSERY RYTHME...said the troll

OK, ok keep your hair on.....now wot would a troll call his bridge OK you big fat hairy stinky troll, did you call your bridge......WOODY......

:zombie:NO, I MUST HAVE THAT NAME OF MY BRIDGE BEFORE YOU CAN CROSS...ENGLISHMAN...........

Who knows the name of this bridge?????? The clue is in the story...anyone

 

[Lady__Stardust]

he called the bridge....mc hammer? =] that would be awesome

and thankyou ^^

 

[maiden1]

he called the bridge....mc hammer? =] that would be awesome

and thankyou ^^

Twood be a good name, but not the right name..

:zombie:I NEED THE NAME OF MY BRIDGE BEFORE YOU CAN CROSS...said the troll

Could it be RUPUNZIL because you do have alot of hair?

:zombie:HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA NOW YOUR JUST TAKING THE PISS...ENGLISHMAN...:zombie:IF YOU WISH TO CROSS MY BRIDGE I MUST HAVE THAT NAME...NOW GO FIND MY NAME

Who would know the name of this bridge? Ray knows the name but he's no were to be seen....Help anyone.

 

[maiden1]

...As I walk back to the place I left Ray, I remember a sign it mentioned A Bridge.

I got it "WOOHOO" I know the name of the Bridge...Farkinell....so now I walk back to the Big Fat Hairy Stinky Troll and his Stinky Bridge.

And I say to the Big Fat Hairy Stinky TROLL...HA...I know wot your Stinky Bloody Bridge is called....The name of your Stinky Bridge is called......

 

[maiden1]

....NONAME

That's the name of your bridge, am I right? I ask the Big Fat Hairy Stinky Troll.

:zombie: Well I suppose so Englishman, you may cross my bridge, but before you cross my bridge can you tell me Englishman, how did you figure out the name of my bridge?

Well you see there is a sign back in the woods it tells you the name of your bridge. Didn't you put it there? I ask the troll.

:zombie:NO....FEE FI FO FUM I SMELL RANDY AND F*CKING MANDY THOGHS F*CKING LITTLE BITCHES.........

You know the two sisters from THE VILLAGE OF THE DAMNED I asked?

:zombie:You may cross my bridge Englishman...BUT be warned I will be changing the name of my bridge.

Wot to I asked the troll, I wont tell anyone......

 

[Lady__Stardust]

 

[maiden1]

...:zombie:Move Englishman before I change my mind.

As I started to walk across the bridge the smell of the Troll got stronger and stronger, FARKINELL, I said to myself, WOT A FARKIN SHITTY STINKY SMELL.

As I walked passed the Troll he put his big ugly smelly foot out and tripped me over, I said now that wasn't very F*CKING FUNNY NOW WAS IT? I asked the Troll. The Troll said,

:zombie:That's the new name of my bridge Englishman.

Wot...TRIP THE ENGLISHMAN..haha very funny

:zombie:NO SILLY,I will call my bridge...TIMBER....HA.HAHA.HAHA I thought of it as you were falling :zombie:I was saying to myself...TIMBER....HA.HAHA.HAHA

So I get to the other side of the bridge and I SAY TO MY SELF, self you have to fix him, So I did, I........

 

[maiden1]

....I told the Troll he should of called his bridge "SHMOKEY"

:zombie:why Englishman>? why would you call my bridge Shmokey?

You see Troll as you were so F*CKING MEAN TO ME, I lit a small fire, I took out my sling shot, got some hot embers and shot them over to the other side of your bridge and you see all that smoke on the other side of your bridge

:zombie:YES

Well that is your bridge, its burning at the other end, soon to be the hole bridge, all that will be left will be a pile of Ash and Smoke, hence the name "SHMOKEY"

:zombie:ENGLISHMAN YOU WILL PAY FOR WOT YOU HAVE DONE TO MY BRIDGE.

So like an Englishman I......

 

[maiden1]

.....I hit the (frog & toad) back on the path, to where I don't know, as I am lost, no where to go, I SHOULD OF ASKED THE TROLL BEFORE I BURNT HIS F*CKING BRIDGE DOWN....

But then again if I had asked the Troll, then he too would know wot my plans are, that place I intend to go, now that would make it easy for the Troll to find me...

So now I'm walking blind as I don't know what's in front of me, this place....