Males and Females

[Omni]

I think that a lot of people like the idea of being able to get people in a relationship to do stuff like that. I've never understood that.

 

[unknown]

@Funerary_Doom , you should've sent him a pic of a giant black cock and told him to suck it

 

[Funerary_Doom]

@unknown shit! i should've! Fuck... here I was trying to think of the most colorful curses to use! a big black cock would've sufficed.

I just don't get it. I actually think maybe he's trying to set up a booty call for when he visits New York. I thought I was quite clear Saturday, but yeah... i actually don't like getting that mad it's exhausting and i tend to say really mean things but i think that was warranted there.

Also, @Omni yeah I think that whole thing people are into. Never understood either. I personally like to sleep and anything that'll cause me a headache and interrupt that i get rid of.

 

[Carpe Mortem]

What a fucking weirdo. Its weird enough as an adult to be all 'teehee I likes you' let alone follow it up with blatant disrespect of you and your relationship.

 

[Master_Yoda77]

I had my lady friend over for the past 2 days. She initially came out Saturday night to see Accept play but she ended up staying Sunday as well after we got several drinks and shit. We didn't fool around or anything, but jesus christ I like her. Like, fuck, I really need to stop liking so much. I know she likes me as well, but she's insistent that she remains single, so I am always hesitant to pull any moves around her. Not that I need the sex so much, I fucking love spending time with her.

Like, I find the concept of soulmates to be pretty idealistic and stupid but I've never felt this way around a woman before. It fucking ruins me to see her leave and I really want to do these days is hang out with her. It's awful. I hate feeling like this.

So here I am, sucking down more beer about to head to a bar while listening to the following song. God, it hits close.

 

[CiG]

Are people really surprised that someone would try to fuck someone else? He's a douche but it's hardly surprising or shocking.
Everything about us is basically geared towards fucking somebody.

 

[The Butt]

Admittedly I've been "that guy" before who tried to weasel my way between a relationship but:

- She was an ex who was dating a new guy for like a week after three weeks of being "on break" with me.
- I was young (I think I was 18), and it was my first relationship.

Not my finest moment. Oops!

 

[Master_Yoda77]

It's not like I am actually weasling my way in here either. We banged months ago and I feel like I' gripping scarps just to be with her even though we both have the time of our lives together.

 

[Satanstoenail]

It's not like I am actually weasling my way in here either. We banged months ago and I feel like I' gripping scarps just to be with her even though we both have the time of our lives together.

Your lady friend has issued a challenge. You need to go forth and conquer.

 

[Master_Yoda77]

What do you mean there? Like, she's hanging out with me just waiting for me to make the big move and fuck her hard?

 

[CiG]

YES.

 

[Master_Yoda77]

Yeah, that is not what is happening... at least from what I can tell. Maybe you guys are right...

 

[Satanstoenail]

I think either girls like to be conquered or guys like to think they've conquered a girl. Either way there needs to be a conquering. Throw away your desperation and climb that mountain.

 

[Master_Yoda77]

I have too much respect for her to throw in the gutter like that. Fuck, I'm too nice.

 

[Satanstoenail]

I'm not talking about disrespecting her. You need to win her over. If she's coming and crashing at your place and you've fucked before but you're not fucking now because you're scared you'll hurt her feelings because she wants to be single or some shit then you need to rectify that situation because it's not a good one and you'll just sit there laughing at her jokes with pre-cum seeping out of your penis for days on end and then torture yourself when she leaves.

 

[The Butt]

You gotta tell her: she gon' learn what a big dick is today.

Only use the line if it is indeed big. Else you will be setting both of you up for disappointment.

 

[CiG]

Show up wearing nothing but a beer-helmet, wielding the Conan The Barbarian soundtrack and chocolate body lotion.

 

[The Butt]

And if you can't find chocolate body lotion this should suffice:

 

[Master_Yoda77]

I'm not talking about disrespecting her. You need to win her over. If she's coming and crashing at your place and you've fucked before but you're not fucking now because you're scared you'll hurt her feelings because she wants to be single or some shit then you need to rectify that situation because it's not a good one and you'll just sit there laughing at her jokes with pre-cum seeping out of your penis for days on end and then torture yourself when she leaves.

This might be the best thing I've ever seen posted on UM. I have to put my final cards on the table and accept the outcome.

My problem is that I'm still grabbing onto the possibility that we may be together once I move to Chicago but that won't be until August or something, so I still feel like holding out and it's kind of ruining me.

 

[Funerary_Doom]

Are people really surprised that someone would try to fuck someone else? He's a douche but it's hardly surprising or shocking.
Everything about us is basically geared towards fucking somebody.

True but what made me more upset was because I thought I was clear a few days before. Also sometimes things just seem like a bigger deal to me than it really is depending on the kinda day it was.

Honestly definitely feel for @Master_Yoda77. At the same time, I don't think it's fair to you. Like I understand wanting to be single and stuff but it's also a little odd to get all the attention from you knowing how you feel. I hope she comes around and it works out for you two. Y'all are adorable together and I had a feeling that was the girl you talked about when you posted the photo on Facebook.