Males and Females

She was willing to cut off people who might potentially make me feel uncomfortable without me even asking her to. It was a very closed-off sheltered relationship there for a while. Unhealthy as that was, it at least made me feel like I could trust her. I suppose she decided to betray her values when she realized that we weren't working out.

I seriously doubt this is the first time she's been unfaithful to someone though, despite insisting beforehand that she's never cheated before.
 
Everything about her was completely insufferable. I got so tired of seeing her every day that I'm pretty sure I subconsciously lost any fucks I gave about the relationship. That probably did the trick.

It's hard to remember but I'm pretty sure our sex life was pretty infrequent for the most part. It's hard to stay attracted to angry jealousy in a woman.
 
Whenever a person - male or female intentionally tries to shut down all your social connections good or bad and replace them with themselves - that's always a no thanks.
 
I was in complete and total denial man. The best part about our relationship was getting to show her off to family and friends. I guess I was hoping she'd chill the fuck out after a while but she never did.

She was gloating about things that her new boyfriend does for her, some which I OFFERED to do as well, but she declined me. Oh, ok, was I supposed to read between the lines and do it anyway?

How do people actually enjoy this bullshit?
 
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I've been told by both my (I guess) serious exes that I don't know how to properly empathize. There's probably some truth in that.

The first one was at least better because we actually went out and did shit together and she wasn't constantly in tears. Terrible relationship for other reasons but that's besides the point. I just want to actually enjoy my time and have fun with the person I'm dating. Not spend our time together in a holding cell just because she can't stand being alone.
 
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I'm not totally sure. It probably just depends. A lot of the time, I felt like my last ex was acting out in ruse in an attempt to get my attention. Something about the way she acted made it hard for me to take her seriously. Mostly because her emotional outbursts were seemingly out of nowhere.

I could just be an asshole and it probably had something to do with me not paying enough attention to her. That's what happens when you spend 24/7 with a significant other. You start seeing them as little more than a roommate and the obligation to even try feels exhausting. I don't know. She's clearly very mentally ill.
 
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How do people actually enjoy this bullshit?

Most don't. If I get into a situation like this, I straight up tell the girl that I can't read her mind and that I'm not going to attempt to do so. Either they get it or they don't. I'm pretty aloof when it comes to relationships generally which is probably why I suck at them. That and being an INTJ makes it hard as well. In the words of redditors, they are the 'coldest humans'.
 
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You know, it's funny, because despite all that, she never could bring herself to leave me herself. Sure, she did it about three times only to take it back an hour later each time. The third time, I'd had enough and dumped her a week later. Pretty sure she cheated on me during that prior week because we stopped staying together before work. It definitely crossed my mind since she was a lot less responsive to texts than usual but I was past the point of caring by then. For some reason I haven't dwelled on it since we broke up and kinda forgot about it until she told me a week ago.

The irony here is that I trusted her. I had some serious jealousy issues with my ex before her and she didn't cheat on me to my knowledge. She gleefully told me about her rebounds so if she had cheated on me, I would probably know by now.

I'm 110% sure I'm done with this absolute nonsense.
 
Actually, I know when it was. The last day we worked before our days off, she blocked the guy that's now her boyfriend and told him they couldn't be friends anymore because he was coming on aggressively towards her at the time and it was making me uncomfortable. Again, she did this without me asking her to. The next day I was supposed to take her out but was too hung over and told her I didn't feel like it. It was probably then.

I like how she thinks cutting people off that could be a threat makes her a noble, faithful girlfriend. It's just a miserable controlling relationship that I never wanted.

I am curious to know how he's doing dealing with a person like her though. I have no idea how long they've been official or whatever but her jealousy issues surfaced very quickly after we met. I don't think guys typically stick around very long with her because of her clingy behavior, which probably just makes her even more clingy. I don't think she's totally over me though because she spent two days (no joke) insulting me and gloating to me about cheating on me after I recontacted her. Flattering that she'd put that much effort into an alcoholic loser who dumped her six months ago.
 
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I'm somewhat of the opinion that controlling behavior alone isn't a reason to end it with someone. My dude was kinda controlling when we first started and I just did what I wanted anyways and logically explained why he was a silly ass. We had the world in common otherwise and about a year into our relationship he chilled out, we're going on 6 years together soon. It's a balancing act for sure. People tend to be at their worst in the beginning IMO, contrary to popular belief. Past experiences of being cheated on and whatnot fucks with their heads.
 
yeah, i've been on the other side of that. i used to think i was an irrationally insecure and paranoid person in relationships but then i got with someone who was a lot more mature and genuine etc and gradually realised the problem had been the nature of the relationships rather than me. i'm completely chill now about stuff that would've given me sleepless nights with past girlfriends.

that said, some people never change and are fucking insane and evil and you should run for your god damned life, RUN BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE
 
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that said, some people never change and are fucking insane and evil and you should run for your god damned life, RUN BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE
LEST YOU FACE THE CONSEQUENCES!

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Yeah, she had the jealous eyes alright. Every single stupid little thing she could find would turn into a jealousy issue. It would have been a reflection of myself from my previous relationship if it hadn't been FAR worse. My ex from before wouldn't have put up with me for that long had I been that jealous and we dated for two years.

My most recent ex literally thinks her emotions make anything she says, does, or thinks ok. Trust me, it was utterly hopeless.

I guess my effort to recontact her was an attempt to see if she had at least taken a look at herself after we ended but nope. She just used the fact that I drank too much as a scapegoat, per usual. She even tried to spin it around in saying she's the one who dumped me and I'm sure that's what she told all my former co-workers. I should send them a group text of the message I sent her explaining why we were done.
 
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Yeah, she had the jealous eyes alright. Every single stupid little thing she could find would turn into a jealousy issue. It would have been a reflection of myself from my previous relationship if it hadn't been FAR worse. My ex from before wouldn't have put up with me for that long had I been that jealous and we dated for two years.

My most recent ex literally thinks her emotions make anything she says, does, or thinks ok. Trust me, it was utterly hopeless.

I guess my effort to recontact her was an attempt to see if she had at least taken a look at herself after we ended but nope. She just used the fact that I drank too much as a scapegoat, per usual. She even tried to spin it around in saying she's the one who dumped me and I'm sure that's what she told all my former co-workers. I should send them a group text of the message I sent her explaining why we were done.

I'm not sure why you would even give a fuck. Former coworkers? Not like they can sabotage you at you current job. I'd leave it alone
 
I am happy I met my dude he's not a jealous person and neither am I. Life is too fucking complicated to be sticking around crazy motherfuckers that kill your joy. Youre better off MF. It doesn't matter how hot she is, hotness is not an excuse for being a terrible fucking person.
 
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