Males and Females

Man what a whirlwind.

So I finally had a talk with the girl Ive been dating, to figure out where her head is at, as well as my own, and to see what we both want out of this. Turns out shes been in and out of long relationships and doesnt want anything to get serious any time soon. Shes keeping her options open to seeing other people, but would still like to see me as well. Found out the other day that she hooked up with someone over the weekend. Id be lying if I said I wasnt a little bummed, but whatever, shes free to act as she pleases.

But, Im not sure Im able to do this. Even though we arent exclusive, Im just not the type of guy to be with multiple women or the person Im dating/seeing/whatever to be with multiple men. When im involved, im involved and it gets devoted to one person.

Meanwhile, I got a message from the first love of my life, who I havnt spoken to in 6 or 7 months, saying she misses me and wants to see me. So once I found out that the current girl Ive been dating is keeping her options open on who she seees, I decided to meet up with my ex today. Long story short, she told me shes fucked up the best thing she ever had in her life because shes under the spell of her ex boyfriend. Its a toxic relationship that she wants out of but finds herself coming back. (This is the dude that she left to get with me, and then dropped me out of the blue to get back with him).

So she told me that she loves me, always has loved me, and will continue to love me and that Im destined to be with her all that shit and the kicker? Shes leaving on a plane today to go to Australia and SE Asia for an undetermined amount of time.

Ive never been so confused by women before in my life.
 
She wants to make sure you're available for when she returns. Given her history, I'd be very skeptical lest she pull the same shit as before and end up back with him after a brief dalliance with you.
 
Yeah I hear ya. But if this resurfaces again when she gets back, what the fuck am I supposed to do? Turn her away? Then it will always be one of those things you wonder what if for the rest of your life...

Tis better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all, no?...Still something im trying to figure out. :lol:
 
Kafka...I could understand her not wanting to get serious, but I don't think "exclusively casual" would be too much to ask on your part. It almost sounds like she's trying to keep you on retainer in case some other guy doesn't pan out... I dunno man. You're either interested or you're not, regardless of how serious you want it to be. It sounds like she isn't.
 
Yeah I agree, she says she's falling in love with me, but she just doesn't want this right now, I guess. Isn't casually exclusive the same as her being my girlfriend, just in different words?

I've been in this situation before where I meet a chick right when she just got out of a huge relationship(s) and I think she just doesn't want to have a commitment to anyone or to have that responsibility. I'm not one to just casually date whoever because more times than not it ends up hurting more than a breakup because it gets stopped out of the blue.

Still just gotta figure out my role in the clusterfuck of my love life right now.
 
Let me rephase... "don't sleep with anyone else, but you don't have to date me" situation. Just friends that could maybe become more? Especially if she's saying she's falling in love with you.
 
She said that this is how her last relationships went, that one ended and another one started right after it unexpectedly. She also went to say that she's jaded because her relationships have always ended from the guy she was dating, for no real reason other than "she's too good for them". So maybe her guard is up because she's feeling vulnerable and doesn't want to follow the same pattern?

I dunno, but the fact is I really like this chick. I don't think I can do a middle ground with her because of how I feel about her...I'm either in, or out.

Should I still try in the hopes to show her I'm not gonna fuck her over? Or let it go and if she comes around she comes around?
 
If you have papers to grade, why are you going out in the first place?

I told you why. Yolo bitch.

Regardless, nothing happened which is fine. She's a nice girl and relatively fun to be with and I may see if she wants to go out again some other time, but I am really not attracted to her physically. So yeah, for those who may give a shit.
 
Should I still try in the hopes to show her I'm not gonna fuck her over? Or let it go and if she comes around she comes around?

If you want commitment, you'll get it. Stick to your guns, no half measures. So long as you don't compromise, she'll eventually abandon resistance and accept your terms.
 
She said that this is how her last relationships went, that one ended and another one started right after it unexpectedly. She also went to say that she's jaded because her relationships have always ended from the guy she was dating, for no real reason other than "she's too good for them". So maybe her guard is up because she's feeling vulnerable and doesn't want to follow the same pattern?

I dunno, but the fact is I really like this chick. I don't think I can do a middle ground with her because of how I feel about her...I'm either in, or out.

Should I still try in the hopes to show her I'm not gonna fuck her over? Or let it go and if she comes around she comes around?

Fuck, your situation is confusing to me.

I'll just reiterate that, no matter what happens with her, don't worry too much about it, as you don't need to force it to work out with the first girl that comes along.
 
I told you why. Yolo bitch.

Regardless, nothing happened which is fine. She's a nice girl and relatively fun to be with and I may see if she wants to go out again some other time, but I am really not attracted to her physically. So yeah, for those who may give a shit.

If you really believed in "YOLO", you wouldn't worry about the papers.

And where are the fucking pictures, bitch?
 
She looked like this girl, except, not as attractive.

fat-girl.jpg


Also, I want that shirt.