That crocodile hunter idiot

spawn

Member
Apr 14, 2001
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Some "highlights" from this evenings show.

He gets in a tiny canoe and goes paddling out into a river with about 8 HUGE hippos in it, gets really close and watches the hippo in charge get REALLY agitated, then after the things been eyeing him like he is lunch for about 10 minutes and shapes to charge him and eat him, he goes "gees, id better get going".
Genius.

He tracks down the most aggressive venomous snake in the world, the egyptian cobra, then as it rears up and REPEATEDLY strikes at him, he keeps going after it, then it climbs a tree and starts launching itself at him from the tree, he says "wow its very aggressive", he then picks up a stick and starts POKING it, which agitates it even more, its hissing and striking like its posessed, then after about 5 minutes of prodding it, and grabbing its tail only to have it strike at him, he decides "gees, i think he is too agitated, id better leave him alone".
Mastermind.

He goes out to track down some rattlesnakes, finds *4* under a rock and pokes one with a stick and drags it out by the tail, its rattling like mad and striking at him, then he puts it on a rock and hears a rattle between his legs, yep you guessed it, ones about 8" from his penis and he looked very worried. He gingerly got up, still holding the other rattler mind you, and moves away, then lets the one he has go, and it strikes at him again before it leaves......he goes "wow, that was close".
A great mind of the 21st century.

He lies down in a burrow while 4 Komodo Dragons (big ass lizards if you dont know) circle him and get close checking him out, he says, "gees, id better not move".
Truly incredible insight he has.

He lies down in the mud along the nile behind a log on a mud flat while 10 feet away about 35 crocs (not an exaggeration) go nuts feeding on carcasses. He then decides to get close and moves towards them.............Then the frenzy ends and all the crocs go beneath the water, so he and the camera crew wade through knee deep water for a while to get out to the bank on the other side.
His intelligence knows no bounds.

Now, I have seen some stupid people, ive seen idiots, ive seen STUPID idiots, but this guy is INSANE, he needs one of those red rubber stamps saying insane stamped on his hand and a white nighty. He is crazy, noone in their right mind would do what he does, im surprised he didnt jump in and ride the crocs for a bit of fun........or maybe use the snakes as a hula hoop.........or see if he could be like jonah and go inside the hippo.........or slap the lizards about a bit and pull their tales for fun.

All up though, it was actually a very enjoyable show I must admit, cant wait for next week, it looked great from the preview! Just wanted to let everyone know he is insane. Utterly!

:D

Ill report back on next weeks highlights then :D
 
Back when it used to be on a few years ago, I was very cynical and didn't like it at all. Now it looks like I've changed because I found tonight's show to be one of the most enjoyable things I've watched this year.

My favourite thing about it - he still wears his shirt and shorts when he's swimming around with the sharkies! Brilliant! :) Can't wait for next week's show!
 
Originally posted by Kem
Ahaha! A-class reporting there Spawny!:lol:

Thanks, Ill be bringing you more of his crazy adventures and mishaps as they happen. This is Spawny signing off for ten news. ;)
 
LOL, Spawn! Did you see the hilarious splices of different snake shots? EVERY single snake was in a feral mood around him. He looks at the camera and blurts out something like "I don't know why, but Snakes just LOVE to STRIKE for my face, they ALWAYS try to bite me on the FACE?" argh ha ha ha *SLAP*
 
Originally posted by Jo
LOL, Spawn! Did you see the hilarious splices of different snake shots? EVERY single snake was in a feral mood around him. He looks at the camera and blurts out something like "I don't know why, but Snakes just LOVE to STRIKE for my face, they ALWAYS try to bite me on the FACE?" argh ha ha ha *SLAP*

Yes! I noticed that too, I think maybe he kicks them around a bit and slaps them a couple of times before he starts filming :lol:
 
The one I liked was when him and Suey(the dog) were in a dinghy and they were cruising around looking for very very poisonous sea snakes - so he spots one and dives out of the boat and into the water (full of poisonous sea snakes) and comes up out of the water with it in his hand and says "WOW what a little beauty this guy is!" Meanwhile his dog is going bollistic and he's just about kissing this snake hes so fascinated with it .:lol:

Who is more intelligent - him or his dog??

Although I can do a very good impression of him at partys:)
 
hehe. I saw last weeks show. He saw a snake. Yells "Snake" and climbs this massive tree to get the snake. He then brings it down on a branch and starts talking about it. While he is talking, the snake takes about 20 bites at him haha. I was rolling around laughing. He certainly is crazy.

As far as seeing snakes goes. Living in the bush and all. I saw a nice dead one on the road 200 meters from here the other day. "A beauty she was"!! haha

oh, and I think he does the anti venom at Australian Reptile Park. So he's not so bad!
 
Originally posted by ironcross
hehe. I saw last weeks show. He saw a snake. Yells "Snake" and climbs this massive tree to get the snake. He then brings it down on a branch and starts talking about it. While he is talking, the snake takes about 20 bites at him haha. I was rolling around laughing. He certainly is crazy.

As far as seeing snakes goes. Living in the bush and all. I saw a nice dead one on the road 200 meters from here the other day. "A beauty she was"!! haha

oh, and I think he does the anti venom at Australian Reptile Park. So he's not so bad!

Haha, yeah I saw that, he kept trying to say something, then the snake would go to bite him and he'd go "woah, youre right mate...." What a nutter :D
Yeah I think he does do the anti venom stuff, but probably because he needs a stickpile nearby!
The only good snake is a dead snake. As Indiana Jones said "I hate snakes!"
 
Yeah hehehe I can see him making the anti venom, it would be like, one for the general public and two for me, one for the general public and three for me! :lol:
You have got to LOVE the sexy snake! ;)
A green snake constricts his head tonight! Leave them alone already I say! :D