The Thread Where You Talk About Music You Like

Dodens Grav said:
Haha, I just found another reason to laugh at the stupidity of reqium99, a reviewer for Metal Crypt.

One thing I can say about this album is that it makes an interesting conversation piece. “Hey, wanna see a piece of shit?” Unfortunately, that is about the only redeeming feature of Ebony Birds, an appalling bad collection of doom-pop tunes with one of the worst vocalists in the history of heavy metal. Don’t be fooled by the stylized swastika cover into thinking this is some white supremacist black metal band, this is just gay Belarusian anti-music that should never have been released.
Classified by most as doom metal, Gods Tower has at least a few albums out, but if this one is any indication of what they are like, count me the fuck out from the rest. To be sure, there are moments on this disc that I didn’t hate, and a parts of a couple songs almost reached enjoyable levels, but there are just so many examples of horrible musicianship, songwriting, and vocal performances I could barely listen to this thing even once without feeling sick. In fact, some parts of this disc qualify as “anti-music”, that is, they almost sound as if they were written with the intent to avoid melody. This is the second worst band in the world, and is the second worst band to ever come out of Belarus. What the fuck is up with that country anyway? They’ve also spawned the horrid demon bastard children Divina Enema, aka The Worst Band in the World, and now I’ve “discovered” (I prefer the term “been aurally sodomized by”) a band almost as bad, if not worse than that hideously terrible neo-gothic loungecore act. I think Divina Enema is a bit worse, but their vocalist can’t match the guy on this Gods Tower disc. He transcends awful. He is so bad I had a very difficult time trying to think of things to say in this review, because really words alone can’t prepare you for just how bad he sounds. Imagine the lower pitched style of James Hetfield crossed with a death metal growl ala Cannibal Corpse, but done in horribly accented Belarusian and completely and totally off key about 2/3 of the time. I’d say he ruins the disc, but there isn’t anything here to ruin.
I genuinely hate this album. In fact, I hate it so much I actually set it on fire and laughed maniacally as it burned after I finished listening to it. Sure, I was out a few bucks since I couldn’t resell it on ebay, but I figure I did the world a favour by removing it from existence. Perhaps I saved some poor unsuspecting metal fan from similar torment?
Unless you enjoy the feeling of being stabbed with rusty razor blades while lying bleeding in a ditch after being sodomized by a zombie Josef Stalin and 2 leprechaun astronauts wielding pruning shears, do not buy anything by Gods Tower. Ever.
Originally written for http://www.metalcrypt.com
An offense against both music and metal. - 0%
Written by requiem99 on August 26th, 2004
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These guys are seriously stupid and should be laughed at.
Looking at their reviews:
Nevermore - This Godless Endeavor = 3.5/5
Exodus - Shovel Headed Kill Machine = 4/5
Torture - Storm Alert - 4.5/5

To give Exodus and Torture a higher grade than that Nevermore albums is just amazing. Exodus has a groove metal tone like Lamb of God now, and that Torture albums was just a generic thrash album that didn't even have any huge thrash hooks... What the hell? These guys suck.:puke:
 
Thought I'd just drop some albums on you that I love that no one else appears to have ever mentioned on here.

Dominus - The First 9 (PHD/Plastic Head) - Sunlight studios sound meets So Far...So Good...So What era Megadeth (complete with vocals from both styles!). Great, if bizarre, concept album about a man who dreams 9 dreams and has to kill some ice demon. Or something. Great stuff, nether the less. http://rockdetector.com/artist,2691.sm

Daemon - 7 Deadly Sins (PHD/Plastic Head) - Pure LHP/Wolverine Blues worship by a "supergroup" comprising not only Nikke Andersson (Entombed), but also Anders Lundemark (Konkhra). Absolute killer Sunlight studios worship, chaotically written and recorded. http://rockdetector.com/artist,2096.sm

Thee Plague Of Gentlemen - Primula Pestis (IHate Records) - The bastard child of Celtic Frost, Winter and Crowbar. Brilliant, heavier than thou Belgian doom. www.tpog.be http://rockdetector.com/artist,35994.sm

The Enchanted - Trust in Death and Rebirth (Golden Lake) - What happens if you combine TSD era At The Gates with the Pagan Spirit of Solstice? You get The Enchanted, that's what. Superb. http://rockdetector.com/artist,32272.sm

Any thoughts?
 
swizzlenuts said:
These guys are seriously stupid and should be laughed at.
Looking at their reviews:
Nevermore - This Godless Endeavor = 3.5/5
Exodus - Shovel Headed Kill Machine = 4/5
Torture - Storm Alert - 4.5/5

To give Exodus and Torture a higher grade than that Nevermore albums is just amazing. Exodus has a groove metal tone like Lamb of God now, and that Torture albums was just a generic thrash album that didn't even have any huge thrash hooks... What the hell? These guys suck.:puke:
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Actually, Nevermore sucks and Torture is awesome, so that sounds about right, but of course requiem is a fucking idiot considering the rating he gave that Exodus album.
 
V.V.V.V.V. said:
Yeah that Torture CD is great! Random thing to re-release, but great stuff!
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:lol: Seriously. Does anyone know why it was actually re-released? I never looked up on it. But I never question when an obscure Thrash CD of high quality is re-released.
 
I bought Reverend Bizarre - "Crush the Insects" today. I'm really enjoying it. More upbeat/faster than their previous material.
 
Dodens Grav said:
Actually, Nevermore sucks and Torture is awesome, so that sounds about right, but of course requiem is a fucking idiot considering the rating he gave that Exodus album.
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I still like, Nevermore, but I gave that Torture album 2 listens and it sounded mediocre to me at best.
 
"Crush the Insects" is fucking great. Starts off with upbeat songs and then gets slower and darker later on. My favorite so far from Reverend Bizarre.
 
Carcassian said:
Thought I'd just drop some albums on you that I love that no one else appears to have ever mentioned on here.

Dominus - The First 9 (PHD/Plastic Head) - Sunlight studios sound meets So Far...So Good...So What era Megadeth (complete with vocals from both styles!). Great, if bizarre, concept album about a man who dreams 9 dreams and has to kill some ice demon. Or something. Great stuff, nether the less. http://rockdetector.com/artist,2691.sm

Daemon - 7 Deadly Sins (PHD/Plastic Head) - Pure LHP/Wolverine Blues worship by a "supergroup" comprising not only Nikke Andersson (Entombed), but also Anders Lundemark (Konkhra). Absolute killer Sunlight studios worship, chaotically written and recorded. http://rockdetector.com/artist,2096.sm

Thee Plague Of Gentlemen - Primula Pestis (IHate Records) - The bastard child of Celtic Frost, Winter and Crowbar. Brilliant, heavier than thou Belgian doom. www.tpog.be http://rockdetector.com/artist,35994.sm

The Enchanted - Trust in Death and Rebirth (Golden Lake) - What happens if you combine TSD era At The Gates with the Pagan Spirit of Solstice? You get The Enchanted, that's what. Superb. http://rockdetector.com/artist,32272.sm

Any thoughts?
Click to expand...

Obiouvsly not. *Sigh*.:mad:
 
swizzlenuts said:
Exodus has a groove metal tone like Lamb of God now
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lol yeah. I heard a song off the new Exodus, and I thought it was something by some crappy new metalcore band. I was shocked when I heard that it was Exodus. In a way, their conscious change in style is kind of like selling out, since metalcore is getting very popular, and they changed their sound accordingly to seel more records.:puke:
 
V.V.V.V.V. said:
Hahaha I have no idea but their site just makes it out to be a new CD or something...it says "release", not "re-release", etc...

Cool stuff though!

Also: WOW Escapi Music is awful! Why did they re-release this?!

http://www.escapimusic.com/

Holy shitty roster!
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Yeah! Fancy releasing Candlemass, Trouble, Krux, Testament DVDs!:rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:
 
When a cd is called shovel headed kill machine you know it's going to suck.
 
Erik said:
New Exodus is fucking awful :kickass:

Lee Altus should stick to Heathen :kickass:
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If they don't have a new album out this year I'm going to post angry messages on their forum. :mad:
 
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