The (Un)official write anything you want page

[Krilons Resa]

 

[lurch70]

haahha ... you got the virus ... had them shits a few weeks ago, Arse Magnet also

 

[Krilons Resa]

every dab of the toilet paper feels like sandpaper to my sphincter at this point. My intestines are absolutely torturing me.

I've been getting progressively worse aches and pains in my body for the past several hours too.

 

[cthulufhtagn]

sounds like bird flu to me


i need some mournful fiddling and sounds of women weeping to go with my beet soup

 

[Reign in Acai]

Beet soup? I just juiced some beets, parsley, apples, and carrots over an hour ago. This poor man's vitameatavegimin made me absolutely nauseous following a serving of scrambled huevos. I feared that I would soon reach Doomcifer's disgruntled 8 shades of shit, but thankfully the moment passed me by like a job opportunity presented to an African American.

Matt, you were on point about Our Journey through the Woods, this album absolutely decimates Der Ort.

 

[Thanatopsis123]

If you're sick, DON'T COME IN TO FUCKING WORK YOU ASSHOLE! I don't get these people. Take a sick day. You have them. Use them.

I'm about to go to Korea for a little vacation to see the missus and my co-worker comes in sick as all hell for the past two days. FUCK YOU!

 

[Reign in Acai]

If you're sick, DON'T COME IN TO FUCKING WORK YOU ASSHOLE! I don't get these people. Take a sick day. You have them. Use them.

Fuck that shit mate, my sick days* are spared for impromptu drinking binges. Only a severe strain of the flu can keep me from clocking in. Though such a strategy can really ream you unexpectedly, as I pulled this stunt two years ago and came down with a debilitating bout of food poisoning the following week. I got paid to wipe my ass raw. Looking back, it made me the sitting pooper that I am today.


*I have to use 3 vacation days before my sick time even gets touched. Next time I get really sick, I'm milking it for 2 weeks.

 

[Thanatopsis123]

Well I don't get sick days being a fucking temp but I know my asshole co-worker does. If that fucker gets me sick before I leave, I might have to stab a bitch.

 

[dorian gray]

@ Jerry

 

[E-bortion]

amen ra rules. fuck the haters.

 

[Nico]

'greed.

 

[Krilons Resa]

x 2


who the fuck is hatin'?

 

[E-bortion]

question: whats the beer that has a special edition that comes in something around 25% alc or so?

 

[swizzlenuts]

Sam Adams Utopias

 

[E-bortion]

any of you guys ever dabbled?

 

[dorian gray]

It's an urban legend

 

[Thanatopsis123]

Dabbled in what?

Speaking of something possibly sexual... What brand of condoms do y'all like? I always find condoms to be too damned tight. I know, they shouldn't be so loose as to slip off, but god damn. I swear one of these days I'm going to lose circulation to my cock for so long it just falls right the fuck off with that damned latex of death still around it.

 

[dorian gray]

Maybe you should try some Magnums, big guy.

Anyway, seriously, fuck condoms. I've had the occasion to forgo sex because of the dreaded condom. They fucking stink too. Or maybe that's me. Whatever. I'm getting a vasectomy soon. I will be able to have sex with everyone!

 

[Thanatopsis123]

Well, the thing is, I'm fairly sure I'm just average sized. Or have they started to do with condoms what they have with clothes sizes but in reverse? You know how they changed the sizes so an old XL is now called a L? Is an average sized condom now called a magnum? When I last bought some I noticed their were a whole damned lot of magnum boxes.

 

[dorian gray]

LOL I guess that's a possibility. I seem to remember a preponderance of Magnums as well. I don't tally long though; I just grab whatever has the most spermicide possible, so I may have just been imagining it. The other stuff like colored, flavored, textured, I just don't see the point. Maybe I'm missing out. But like I said, my days of latex funk are coming to an end.