What the f*ck shoud i do??

Fractured

Fractured

Meh
Dec 3, 2002
4,374
32
48
48
Sthlm, Sweden
Visit site
Ok, me and my girl broke up about 1 month ago, and everything felt fine, until tonight..(I'm 27 and she is 38)...when one of her daughters called and just cried "dont you love my mother anymore? Are you not coming back?..You are the only one i have ever want to call my father", fuck that just broke my heart... I love her kids as if they were mine...damn...I tried to call her...She wont take my calls....What the fuck should i do??? I dont want to go back to her, i need to be alone for a while..This shit is tearing me apart, we have been together for 4 years, her kids are 11 and 9, i have been like their father... And now im not there for them.. That is the worst part.. I dont know fuck... She had lost about 8kg in the last week... i dont even know why i write this crap here... I just dont know what to do!!!! I want her to feel good dammit! But i feel as i cant be part of her life, i want my own life now... What if she takes her own life? Is that my fault? I cant just go back out of pity right?! Fuck...i dont know....

Despite the subject line i do not expect any answers, i just wanted to write this...it feels better this way...

//Johan
 
No, I don't think it's your fault. Getting back together because you feel sorry for her would definitely be the wrong reason. It's unfair for both of you. But I don't know what to tell you to do either. I hope you find some clarity soon.
 
Fractured said:
What if she takes her own life? Is that my fault?
Click to expand...
no, not your fault.
do you have the impression she would try? you write she has 2 kids - who would take care of them then? plus, I think you two are at an age where you both can think of a reasonable way out, which suicide would definitely not be. maybe you 2 find a kind of compromise...? that you stay in contact with the kids when they like you so much, ... this sort of compromise perhaps?
 
I'm really sorry to hear that Johan. :( But I have no advice for you other than what's already been said. This is one of those things you have to work out yourself... and the best of luck to you, sir. :)
 
yeah I´m sorry too :cry:
same here, I got no advice but what I do know is that it can feel better if you talk to someone, and sometimes the friends you wanna talk too doenst have time or other problems or whatever, so if you wanna go and have a beer or whatever, watch a fuzz game or just talk ...just let me know :)

/anders
 
This is one of those many times in life where there is no easy answer. In the interim it seems you lose no matter which way you go. In order to do the right thing though, you must do what is right for you! Ultimately this is the only way to do the right thing by other people. If you don't want to go back to this woman then DON'T!! You would be deceiving her and her kids and nothing good can come from that. It sounds like you've forged a very close relationship with those kids and maybe you'll be able to maintain it in the future but you already had that relationship with them when you decided it was time to split, so you must've been prepared for the ensuing sadness, surely.
Bottom line here is you are guilty of no wrong doing and should therefore not let guilt cause you to perpetuate a situation you already decided (and felt good about the decision) should end.
If she won't take your calls that proves you made the right decision. Either that or she's a 38 year old woman with 2 kids who doesn't mind playing games...in which case...errr...that proves you made the right decision! Getting back together "for the kid's sake" would not only be wrong, it would be irresponsible.
 
Caelestia said:
No, I don't think it's your fault. Getting back together because you feel sorry for her would definitely be the wrong reason. It's unfair for both of you. But I don't know what to tell you to do either. I hope you find some clarity soon.
Click to expand...


I totally agree. You have to do what is right for YOU. Not what other people want.
 
Talk to her kids and comfort them, and tell them to also discuss it with their mother. She will want them to be happy. I hope this works out for all of you.

Steve
 
Well it took a couple of weeks, but everything worked out good. :D

I jumped on a plane and talked to her and the kids face to face.

Just wanna thank you all for the responses here and the pm's. :)

Thanks...

Johan
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

DeadBaytar
I'm obsessed with Avril Lavigne!!!
Replies
52
Views
3K
Chat
Furious B
F
D
can i get some advice? sorry if this is too personal
Replies
20
Views
1K
Chat
paranoidmexican009
P
edtrax
Psycho I Met The Other Night
Replies
4
Views
279
Chat
Pessimism
P
TB666
An important question.
Replies
12
Views
276
Chat
TB666
T
pceptimus
Becoming
Replies
1
Views
249
Chat
pceptimus
P
Top Bottom
Back